I recently moved from home in Kericho, and let me tell you something. Experiencing nature and the seasons was something I never thought to be important until I came back to Nairobi. At home, we were just experiencing spring-like conditions from April till now, coming out of the drought, with sunshine most of the day and rain in the afternoon to evenings. It's the season of reproduction, the flowers are in bloom, and the animals are in heat. Birds are nesting and coupling up. There was so much regenerative power in the air and I could feel the transformation in my mind. Food for the animals was plenty. Life kinda took a break from all the survival strife and just took time to heal and reproduce. Most of my life has been spent inside rooms and being outdoors for a long period of time, since January, opened my eyes to the nature around me. I thought, we as humans live so separated from nature, despite being 100% of it. Our day-to-day in town is programmed for minimal interruption throughout the year, and I feel sorry for the people who never get to leave. The season runs from April to July at a resop (shagz) near you. Any such experiences?

Previous, first, next,
Fanfiction.
Chapter 28 cont;
Working at sea had made me buy a coat specifically designed for the more extreme types of weather, but with its age and my short stint in the Irish sea the efficacy of the wax coating had all but vanished, after only taking a few steps I felt the water beginning to seep through. Putting aside the chill that came with wearing wet clothes I made my way along the deck until I found the cruiser.
She wasn't particularly difficult to find. Her cherry blond hair and pure white cape made it easy to spot her against the greys of the ship and sky. Her head was tilted upward with her eyes closed. She held Montpelier’s cube in her arms letting the rain fall on it. She must have noticed me coming, for she opened her eyes and looked over to me as I approached.
“Hey.” She greeted, her tone completely neutral and with a distinctive lack of the boyish bravado I had heard before. Her hair and all of her clothes were absolutely drenched yet she didn't seem to care.
“Hey. How are you holding up?” I awkwardly replied.
“Fine, I guess.” Cleveland replied, looking down at the cube and affectionately rubbing it with her thumb. “I’ve had this body for half a year now. Yet this is the first time I've ever felt the rain.”
“And how are you finding it?”
“Cold and wet.” She lifted her head up once again, letting the rain splash against her face. “But it is kinda nice. The sound against the deck and sea is rather pleasant.”
“You should try listening to it near a forest or field, especially during spring. I used to listen to it all the time back home.” Memories of countless days back home sitting in the study with the window open reading book after book while it rained outside surfaced.
“Guess that stereotype holds true then, eh?” There was the faintest hint of a smile on her lips. “Monty always enjoyed the quiet time we had together.”
My eyes were drawn to the cube in her hands. “May I?”
There was a moment of reticence before she slowly offered the cube to me. “Please, be careful.”
“I will, I promise.” I carefully took the item from Cleveland, taking it into my hands as delicately as I could. The dull crystal felt cold to my touch, and it wasn’t only due to the rain. I slowly rotated it in my fingers, hoping for something, anything that would show a sign of activity within, yet my mind didn’t become awash with random thoughts or feelings; it felt like nothing more than mundane glass in my hands.
The guilt was piling up again. “I can't begin to express how sorry I am. We should have acted sooner.”
Cleveland looked at her hand while she flexed her fingers, but her eyes never left the cube. “You have nothing to be sorry for. You did all that you could, and even took a great risk for complete strangers. It's me who is to blame for not being there for her. For leaving her behind.”
“But I will not fail her again.” She continued, confidence returning to her voice and posture. “I know within my heart that we will be reunited one day.” She ran a hand along the silver streak in her hair.
“If you don't mind me asking, what happened when you touched your sister's ship? For a moment it looked like you had two riggings.” I asked, my curiosity getting the better of me.
“I don't really know what or how I did it, I just couldn't let her ship fall apart like that. However, now it seems like I can have both my and her rigging.” She waved a hand out to sea where a Cruiser sailed alongside the battleship. And with a flash of light her rigging appeared. “It's uncomfortable having both at the same time to say the least, but like this it's not too bad.”
“Well you can keep her ship safe for her.” I carefully held out the cube for her to take back. “If there's one thing I've learned in the time I've spent around you girls is that anything is possible.”
“Thanks.” She took the cube back. “Not just for saying that, but for everything you and your crew have done. It's heartening to know there's at least one person out there looking out for us.” Cleveland rocked on her heels. “If it's alright with you, may I hang around with you guys for a bit? I don't really have anywhere else to go and being part of a fleet sounds nice.”
“There will always be a place for you in this fleet, Cleveland. For you and any other ship that wishes to join us.” I offered my hand. “No strings attached, if you don't wish to fight or follow orders then you can just wait out any fight onboard a ship”
Cleveland gave a toothy smile. “I won’t be no slacker. I'll earn my keep just as much as any other girl. You can depend on our six inch guns.” I paid attention to her eyes when she took my hand. Now there was the distinct blue glow for less than a second in her right eye, something that had happened before with other girls. Cleveland seemed to relax slightly after the exchange, but I could still see weariness in her.
She tilted her head up to the sky. “Man, it's really coming down now. We should head back inside.” Cleveland took one more pensive look at her ship before walking inside.
The water dripping from our clothes echoed inside the ship as we walked. We came upon a junction where we would go down different paths, and Cleveland paused to speak, rubbing the brooch on her cape once again. “James… About what you did. I know it probably isn't right to say, but thank you. If anyone deserved such a fate, it was him. So you ever need anything from me, no matter what it is I will do it.”
“Uh, thanks.” I replied, unable to think of something meaningful to say. The idea of being thanked for what I did was hard to comprehend, but the gratitude I saw in the cruiser's face helped ease the turmoil within.
That gratitude was also disturbing somehow.
–
I decided to return to my cabin with my drenched self and next to no desire to eat. I changed out of the wet raincoat and inner clothes and sat down on my bed, contemplating what to do. With how exhausted I felt sleep would probably come easily but I knew without a doubt it would be anything but peaceful.
There was the option of finishing off the bottle under my bed, but while it would help it’d only be pushing the problem aside temporarily, and I didn’t want Warspite or worse, Javelin or Z23 see me in that state. I continued mulling over my options until the daylight disappeared completely. Just as I was about to risk a night's sleep there and there came a gentle knocking at my door.
With a sigh, I got up and opened the door. I was greeted with the warm and dignified visage of Hood standing on the other side, with several books held under her arm and lips curled into a smile when our eyes met.
“Ah good,” her eyes moved to the empty tray still left at the side. “I see you enjoyed your lunch. May I come in?”
Hood had been the one to leave that try outside my door, even after how I had snapped at her, now I just felt even more guilty.
I stepped aside and waved her in. “Please.”
The battlecruiser walked into the small cabin with a familiar scent of lavender trailing behind her. She placed her books down on the small table while inquisitively looking around the room. I soon wished I had cleaned it.
I gulped when her eyes spotted the bottle under my bed. She didn’t say anything about it, but laid dead still, keeping an inscrutable smile. She lingered on it for a moment then returned her attention to me, taking off the glove of her right hand in the process. She gestured to come closer with one of her revealed fingers. “Come here.”
The very instant I closed the distance, I received a slap for the second time today, faster than I could react as well.
“I deserved that.” I sputtered gracelessly, rubbing my swollen cheek. She didn’t hit me as hard as Warspite had, but it had been the same side and reignited the sting from earlier.
“I will not tolerate being spoken to in such a manner, not from you nor anyone else. Not now, not ever.” Hood folded her arm and raised her nose curtly, her face a scowl of indignation. “No matter what you went through, to threaten one of us with an order of that kind goes against everything you stand for, and if you ever begin to stray again a slap will be the least of your problems, James.”
I looked down, misery once more coming afloat.
With her fury vented, Hood's posture relaxed and she looked at me more caringly. She put on her glove again. “James. I–we only desire to be of service to you in any way we can. You need not suffer alone. You don’t have to suffer alone, nothing good will come of it. Which is why I am here now.”
She carefully sat down on the small chair in the room, ensuring her large skirt didn’t get caught or creased.
“I don’t understand?”
She smiled with dignity. “My cabin is directly next to yours. And the walls are naught but a thin sheet of metal. I know you regularly awaken suddenly in the night from being disturbed in your sleep, so I'm here to ensure you get a proper night's rest.” She waved to the pile of books and the bed. “Don’t worry about me, I will keep myself occupied.”
I opened my mouth to protest but she quickly cut me off. “There will be no negotiation, you assisted me when I struggled to sleep and now I shall do the same. Now get yourself ready for bed, I will close my eyes.” She leaned back and shut her eyes.
Knowing there was no point in arguing, I removed both my shirt and trousers and laid myself down in bed. My face felt warm at the idea of Hood sitting by me while I slept, enough to overpower the last bits of lingering pain from the slap, but exhaustion hit me like a train the moment I laid down.
Hood reopened her eyes with the slightest bit of a blush of her own. “Good, now you just relax and I will be here if you need me.” Hood reached down and grabbed the bottle. “Honestly, I don’t understand your reasoning behind seeking comfort in this instead of getting it from a beautiful lady.” She opened the bottle and took a rather large swig.
“Don’t know where I could find the latter.” I mumbled.
“I am not ignorant of how I look, nor am I to your wandering gaze.” She quipped with a coy smile. “Now enough chitchat, it’s time for you to rest. That is unless you want me to read for you?”
“Fine, fine. Have it your way.” I said, resting my head down and shutting my eyes. It took a while to get over the nerves of having Hood sitting beside me, but the occasional flip of a page became a pleasant background noise that helped lull me to sleep.
—
Warspite sat in her captain’s chair, resting her head in her arm as she wracked her brain. She rocked her head back with a groan once more. “Why did you have to go and hit him, Warspite? You bloody stupid ship.”
She didn’t know why she had such a rush of emotions when he spoke and acted without thinking before bawling like an infant. Why is it now that just his presence is enough to throw her whits into a loop, yet she couldn’t wait until he was sitting in this chair with her at his side again?
“Things were easier when I wanted naught but to throw him overboard.” She sighed.
Another issue came to her mind, something she had brought back from the facility, not the notebook; that could remain safely locked away until she was sure her opinion of humans wouldn’t worsen even more. This was something else, something she wished she had never even touched and just left it where it lay, for what it meant made her sick.
Someone approached her bridge, Warspite quickly brushed aside her thoughts and tried to figure out who it was. She was unsuccessful at figuring out who it was but when the door had opened she quickly dropped to her knee.
“Good evening, your Majesty.”
Elizabeth smiled and walked onto the bridge. “There will never be a day where thou need to kneel upon thy own bridge. Stand, my dear Warspite.”
“Yes, your Majesty.” The battleship stood back up. “How was your rest? I hope the rain was not too distracting.” Warspite offered the captain's chair to Elizabeth for her to sit. But the tiny Queen remained standing.
After surveying the surrounding sea Elizabeth turned to her sister. “T’was most pleasant. How did things fare while I rested? Did you speak to our Commander about the book?”
“Ah, well.” Warspite scratched her head. “He gave me the same answer as you, your Majesty. I will wait until Cleveland is in a better condition and ask her permission to read it.”
Elizabeth brought a hand to her chin, noticing the small movements and fidgeting her sister was still doing. “Yet something troubles you still. Is it anything I could be of assistance with?”
Warspite sighed and dropped her shoulders. “May I ask for your assistance in something, not as my queen but as my sister?”
The Queen nodded with a soft smile. “I will always be your big sister before I am your Queen, Warspite. What is it you wish to confide in me with?”
“One second.” She replied before walking off into a small secondary inner communications room connected to the bridge, its purpose made redundant by her being able to control the ship completely no matter where she was. But inside a small cabinet was an inconspicuous rag that hid the source of her problems. She returned to the bridge with the item in hand.
“The notepad wasn't the only thing I grabbed before leaving.” She spoke as she walked over. “When James…” Warspite paused as she relived the memory. “When he shot that wretched man he dropped his gun.”
Peeling back the rag she showed Elizabeth the firearm. “There had been something about the sound it made when it fell that made me curious. I could tell you, but I think it's better for you to see for yourself.”
She offered the gun to her sister cautiously. Elizabeth took the firearm into her hand, instantly finding herself being able to handle it like she had trained with it for decades. Her brow furrowed as she noticed something was off about it.
“It can't be.” She pressed down on the magazine release to confirm her suspicion. “It's… empty?” Elizabeth was dumbfounded at the empty magazine. “Did you unload it?”
Warspite sighed and shook her head. “Unfortunately no. This is how it was, so technically…”
“James was never in any real danger.” Elizabeth finished, remembering what Warspite had told her of the exchange when they had returned.
“And that's the problem, I know James would want me to be honest to him. But what he did is tearing him apart inside, this would only make things worse.” She looked in the general direction of where his cabin would be. “I’m perplexed, Elizabeth. I’m sorry for dropping this on you, but what should I do?”
The Queen was silent for a while. Her gaze was distant as she thought over the problem until her smile returned and she returned the gun to her sister. “You should throw this in the ocean and forget about it. He put a gun against our James’ head. Loaded or not, James acted accordingly.”
Warspite looked at the gun and nodded. “I should have clocked it.”
An arm rested against her shoulder. “The past is filled with should haves and would haves, Warspite. If we were able to go back and change things then a lot of disasters could have been avoided.” Elizabeth felt the echoes of a memory come to mind, of a beach too steep to climb and an ocean filled with blood. “But we can't change them, so we must learn, grow stronger and soldier onward.”
The two sisters embraced one another in a hug for a long time until eventually breaking and retiring for the night. But not before the old warship went and threw the gun overboard, cursing the name of its deceased owner as she did, hoping the seas would swallow one more secret, never to resurface again.
(A/N) once again I ended up seeing this chapter getting longer and longer, I hope you enjoyed the chapter and look forward to the next, it should be coming soon as at the time of posting this the next chapter is already about halfway done.

I (22M) regret staying local for college so much. So many factors came into play regarding my choice to stay and they made sense at the time but I wish I could go back and force myself to stay. I don’t feel like transferring is an option now but I’m so miserable. I only have 1 year left but every day I wake up and wish I was somewhere else.
Here’s my timeline
Fall 2019: start community college Fall 2021: apply for transfer Spring 2022: take a semester off bc I finished my units Fall 2022: attend a UC briefly, have to drop out because of reasons I will list below Spring 2023: continue education at local state school in order to still graduate on time
Reasons I left the UC: •my financial aid was stripped last minute, leaving me with a ridiculous amount of loans I’d have to take •I was unsure in my major (film), and I didn’t want to take more loans to figure that out •my dad was being forced to sell the house due to external circumstances, and if I came back I’d be able to help him keep it (without this house I’d be homeless) •felt I may have better opportunities at the state school instead of the UC
Fast forward to now, I just finished my first semester at the local state school under what I feel is a better major (Creative Media), but I feel so empty. I’m taking units at an accelerated rate to graduate on time but it doesn’t feel worth it. The whole point of a college degree is to help get a job, but this degree does not feel like it’s going to help. My school doesn’t help with internships or anything, but even if they did I wouldn’t want to work bc then it would cement me here. Everyday I’m either at school or doing nothing. My school doesn’t help with internships, none of which would matter anyway bc I can’t bear getting a job here bc that just cements me to being here longer. I commute from home because I live so close (20 min) but at this point I’d rather go into debt than live here any longer. Which is weird because I have a perfect home life. I can do whatever I want whenever I want, i buy my own groceries and have my own freedoms, privacy, etc. but I still crave a change.
I want to be an actor but I can’t find any auditions or classes near me that I haven’t already taken. There are no theatre or improv clubs at my school. It got so bad I tried to make my own improv group but it fell apart bc we didn’t know what we were doing. I know I fucked up bad staying here and it feels like I’m just letting my life slip away. I’m almost 23 and stuck here until I turn 24 since that’s when I’ll graduate and whenever I remember that it makes me wanna die.
I know “the grass is always greener”, but I genuinely feel like I’d be so much happier living away from home. Because even if it was worse at least I’d be experiencing something new. Every time I drive around this town it feels like I’ve done everything here.
I’ve talked to a therapist about this but I don’t feel like much progress has been made. Mainly I’ll just forget I feel this way for a few weeks and then I’ll remember and get depressed again.
I am such an outgoing person so being locked in house with no reason to leave drains me so bad. I need to get out of here no matter what it takes, but I don’t want to drop out of college either. I don’t know what I can do.
I know I’m just a guy who tried desperately to cling onto the past, but it feels so unfair that I have to pay for it with 2 years of my life. I’ve felt this way since January, which is past when applications are due so if I wanted to transfer I’d have to apply in the fall and then wait until next fall, which by that point I’ll already be graduated from the state school. I don’t want to drop out of college but I’m open to anything that gets me out of my situation and helps me experience something new. I have around 30k saved and no college debt, so luckily I’m not tied here financially anymore, but that doesn’t make me feel any less stuck.
TLDR: chose to go to school far away, but when I left my family had to sell our house so I came back to help and go to college locally. House got kept but now I’m miserable living in it and feel like I may have been better off letting them sell it and not coming back.

THE compulsive gambler sub consciously wants to lose his shirt, of course, along with everything else he owns, and so he again and again puts down the rent money on the Montreal Expos or 80‐to‐1 2‐year‐old maiden fillies wear ing blinkers and bandaged forelegs. And if he's nothing else, Walter Matthau, the 50‐year‐old stage and movie actor, is a compulsive gambler. A few years ago, for instance, while in Florida to film episodes of a TV series called “Tallahassee 7000,” Matthau breath‐takingly managed in a mere two weeks to drop no less than $183,000. He lost the money, moreover, not by backing crippled nags at Hialeah but mainly instead by betting on the outcome of spring training baseball games, a way of tossing bundles of money out the window that should surely that year have won him the Nobel Prize for masochism.
Since dropping that $183,000, sum that eventually took, him six years to pay off to his increa ingly impatient Mafia ‐ connected book maker, Matthau has cut down con siderably on the amounts that he bets, especially when he goes to race tracks, and on a good day at Holly wood Park he can now come happily home having lost only $400 or $580.
Still, he continues casually to bet thousand dollars or so on things like N.B.A. play‐off games or whether or not a friend can name the capital of Albania, and so remains a prime example of the evils of gambling to all those New Yorkers who are thinking of taking a first‐time fling at the ponies because of an easy access these days to offtrack betting windows in Grand Central Station and elsewhere. “I think that off‐track betting is great for New York,” dryly remarked Matthau during a recent three‐day visit to the city from his home in California. “I mean, it's so democratic—if they keep up off‐track betting long enough, every body in town will be on welfare.”
Of course, though he has the mo rose, hangdog look of a chronic loser, Matthas is scarcely a loser in everything he gets mixed up in. Far from it, as a matter of fact. For example, when signing contracts for his last several movies he chose to gamble on accepting a percentage of the profits in lieu of a salary, and at least one of these gambles has al ready handsomely paid off—his per centage of “Cactus Flower,” a film he made a couple of years ago with Ingrid Bergman and Goldie Hawn, has so far amounted, to more than a million dollars. And he's also on the way to making another million or so as his share of the profits from each of his two most recent pictures—“A New Leaf,” a wacky comedy in which he is co‐starred with Elaine May, and “Plaza Suite,” the film version of Neil Simon's exceedingly successful Broadway play. So, unlike almost every other compulsive gamb er in the country, Matthau is nowadays just about literally rolling in money. Besides, pleased with the way that his career is going, with his marriage, with his three children, and with his seaside home in Pacific Palisades, Calif., Matthau is even happy, an emotion not normally associated with the compulsive gambler.
HOW does a compulsive gambler get to be one? The story of Matthau's life is perhaps an object lesson to all of those who have lately been spend ing their lunch hours in Grand Cen tral Station to wait in line for the dubious privilege of giving away their money to Howard Samuels and his Off track Betting Corporation. In any event, Matthau was born on the lower East Side of Manhattan on Oct. 1, 1920, the son of an impoverished Russian‐Jewish immigrant from Kiev, in the Ukraine, and of a Lithuanian born Jewish mother.
When Matthau was 3 years old, and his older brother, Henry, was 5, his father, a worker at such odd jobs as serving subpoenas for law firms, lit out for parts unknown, leaving him and his brother to be raised by their mother, Rose, who managed to scrape a marginal living for herself and her sons by working as a sewing machine operator in garment district sweatshops. In 1935, when Matthau was 15 years old, he learned of his father's death in Bellevue Hospital. His mother is still living, and—sup ported in the grand manner by her sons (Matthau's brother lives now on Long Island and is a jobber of surplus Army‐Navy goods)—divides her time these days between a penthouse on West End Avenue and a condo in Miami Beach.
During his childhood, Matthau, his brother and his mother lived in succession of cold‐water tenement apartments in the Ukrainian area of the Lower East Side, that is, around East Fifth Street near Second Av enue, being forced to vacate each apartment after only a few months because they'd got so hopelessly far behind in the rent that their land lord would have them evicted. Years later, when Matthau briefly sublet Paul Newman's house in Hollywood for $3,700 per month, he recalled with a shake of his head that $3,700 was more money than the Matthau family had spent on rent during 20 years on the Lower East Side. Mat thau, however, hasn't the slightest nostalgia these days for his poverty ridden childhood. “It was a night mare—a dreadful, horrible, stinking nightmare,” he grimly remembers.
On the Lower East Side, Matthau recalls, the highest ambition of most of his class ates was some day to become a salesman for a garment district dress house, for he himself secretly had far more exalted am bitions — by the age of 8, a day dreamer, a loner, a reader of Shake speare, he'd already determined to become a famous writer and actor. Encouraged by a teacher who ad mired his speaking voice, Matthau appeared in a number of school plays and also regularly recited poetry in school assemblies. On East Fifth Street, anyone who evinced an interest in poetry was thought by his classmates to be seriously lacking in machismo, and Matthau often found himself getting beaten up at recess by schoolyard bullies. So, already feet tall by the age of 10 (he weighed only 90 pounds, however, and, says Matthau, who is today 6 feet 3 inches tall and weighs 180 pounds; “when I drank cherry soda, I looked like thermometer”), he put himself through a regimen of muscle‐building until “I had Popeyelike bumps on my skinny arms and could beat up any body who made snide remarks about my poetry reading.”
When Matthau was 11 years old, in fact, one of those whom he alleges to have beaten up in the schoolyard was none other than Rocky Graziano, who grew up, of course, to become the middleweight boxing champion of the world. Of Matthau's claim to having beaten up Graziano, one can unequivocally make the following statement: The story either is or is not true.
IN any event, along with being a compulsive gambler, Matthau is also something of a compulsive stretcher of the truth. Or, to put it perhaps a bit more tactfully, a compulsive weaver of fiction when it comes to talking about his past. For example, bored with repeating the story of his life over and over again to interview ers, Matthau has on more than one occasion told newspapermen and magazine writers that his father was a defrocked Russian Orthodox priest who'd had to flee for his life from Czarist Kiev in 1906 because he'd been preaching sermons in support of Pope Pius X. And this story, told by Matthau to interviewers with an absolutely straight face, has appeared several times as the God's truth in such usually accurate publications as Time and Current Biography.
NOT long ago, too, when Matthau was in New York for a round of newspaper, maga zine, radio and TV interviews to promote “Plaza Suite,” chanced to be in earshot when he told a story to Neil Simon that he'd heard the night be fore from Gene Saks, the director, about a somewhat aging and hard ‐ of hearing actor who'd had trouble re membering his lines in a play last winter at the Palm Beach Playhouse in Florida. So, as Matthau told the story to Si mon, a prompter, unseen by the audience, was hidden in a hole cut into the front of the stage and instructed to call out only key words to the actor when a line was for gotten. “Drastic,” whispered the prompter when the actor went up in his lines on the opening night of the play. From the hard ‐ of ‐ hearing actor, no response. “Drastic,” repeated the prompter in a somewhat louder voice. Again, no response. “Drastic,” the prompter now all but shouted. Still no response, upon which a man in the second row of the orchestra stood up and yelled “Dastic!” The actor heard him, smiled, remem bered his line, and the play went on.
As show‐biz stories go, not bad. Not so great, either. The following evening, however, happened to be on hand when Matthau was being inter viewed by David Frost on Frost's TV talk show and was asked, “What was your most embarrassing moment in the theater?” And, without batting an eyelash, Matthau pro ceeded to tell the “drastic” story as though it was some thing that had happened to him years ago on Broadway.
He concocts personal anec dotes that aren't true, Mat thau later somewhat abashedly told me, because they liven up otherwise boring inter views and make his past seem more colorful than it really was. “Like saying that my father was a Catholic priest — I figure that makes me more interesting than just another Jewish actor who had a pair of Jewish parents,” Matthau explained to me with a grin. “Jewish and Catholic— if I can just work a Protestant into my background, I'm all set.”

Let's just jump right into it! Hopefully this helps some blind buying souls such as myself. Here are some reviews:
Afnan 9PM - JPG Ultra Male: Picked up a bottle at Amazon for $35USD at the suggestion of one of the users in one of my previous threads. Typical paper cardboard housing with Afnan branding. But we're here for the juice anyways. Basic design but... premium feeling. Nice weight, the atomizer cap is also premium. Good strong spray that outputs a cloud of mist, very good atomizer. First spray you're hit with a citrus and lavender scent, fairly fruity, but this almost immediately leaves and is replaced by a very warm scent which I would describe as a spicy amber. This sticks around but only as an undertone to the extreme vanilla. It's not overpowering, but it's identifiable. Very nice. The first time I sprayed it, I immediately identified the JPG heritage in it, I have owned Le Male and that vanilla is identifiable anywhere. Highly recommend. 8/10. Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Have it
Ana Abiyedh Rouge - Baccarat Rouge 540: If this is an accurate BR540 clone, I can confidently say the scent is very mid. Leans heavily on wood and amber, gives CK Obsession vibes oddly. I wear this because others are in love with it. Have gotten raving compliments. But I also rarely wear it alone, layering it with CDNIM. Great performance, lasting many hours projecting, and when it becomes a skin scent it's there until you wash your clothes I swear. Edit: I got a BR540 authentic decant, it's VERY similar. Like REALLY similar. The price difference on the two is nuts. 6/10. Would I wear it again: Reluctantly Would I want to smell it on someone else: Not really Would I buy the full bottle: Have it
Armaf Odyssey Homme - Dior Homme Intense/Valentino Uomo Intense: Almost tobacco spicy like smell on first spray, then settles into a vanilla amber. Lots and lots of amber and vanilla with this one. Good winter fragrance. Affordable price. Average projection and performance of 4-5 hours max. Not really for me honestly, it doesn't stand out. 6/10. Would I wear it again: Meh Would I want to smell it on someone else: Not really Would I buy the full bottle: Have it
Belcam Shades of Blue - D&G Light Blue: A fantastic fresh fragrance, and for the price it's amazing. Definitely the best smelling Belcam cologne yet in my opinion - other than the shit performance. It's so bad guys. Spray and it's become a skin scent within 20 minutes max. Over spray like crazy for a slight chance at this sticking around. Fantastic as just a pillow spray/room scenter imo. 6.5/10, major dings for performance. Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Have it
Belcam Geau Black - ADG Profumo: Has a pepper musk added to the original Acqua Di Gio scent, and I'm not sure I like it. Mid performance, lasting perhaps an hour. Great price as always from Belcam. 5/10. Would I wear it again: Eh Would I want to smell it on someone else: Meh Would I buy the full bottle: Have it
Belcam Geau Original - ADG: When I picked this one up I had a bottle of the original ADG on hand, and upon spraying both on both arms, I found Belcams perfume actually lasted longer than the OG. It is more linear than ADG, but after letting my dad (who's worn ADG for years) try to distinguish between the two after the dry down, he picked Belcams perfume as his choice for which more accurately represented what he thinks of when he sprays ADG! Very intriguing. Good price as always! 7.5/10. Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Have it
Belcam Classic Match - Drakkar Noir: This is obviously intended to be a clone of Drakkar Noir. I have a bottle on hand, so I was able to compare the two. Personally I find the original Drakkar to be midtier at best in terms of performance and general smell, but I digress. Spraying both on me, the initial scent and the dry down both had Classic Match as a dead ringer for Drakkar! There was a bit of a pine undertone that perhaps was not quite right, but very easy to miss. Oddly, when I let my brother and father try out distinguishing the two in the initial spray, they both disagreed with me that one smelled vastly different from the other. It's possible their sniffers were off as we had been at new perfume testing for a while by that point. I have to disagree with them, it's a really good clone. 7/10. Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Have it
Belcam Geau Blue - ADG Profondo: This one from Belcam takes all the notes of ADG that we love and gives it a...well...blue smell! It smells fresher, more vibrant than the original ADG. I have gotten many compliments on this one. Again though, it doesn't last for too long. Maybe an hour to an hour and a half max. Great price! A strong clone of ADG Profondo. 8/10. Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Have it
Belcam Volatile - Viktor and Rolf Spicebomb: This thing succeeds in being a spicebomb-esque clone. It is incredibly spicy, and called volatile for a reason. That being said, it's a lovely fragrance, for a super affordable price, you can't go wrong with this one. Lasting an hour or so before becoming skin scent, it's one of my favorites from this house. 7.5/10. Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Have it
Club de Nuit Sillage - Creed Silver Mountain Water: So intriguing. I've never seen someone capture the smells of both metallic twang and freshwater nature green in the same scent. A good price, from a good house, and well worth a try. 7.5/10. Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Have it
Creed Virgin Island water: Opens very tropical, lemony with a coconut oil background, it's not as straight coconut as I expected, and has a much appreciated twist of citrus. It quickly dies down into a lemony coconut. I can still faintly smell this on myself as a skin scent like 12 hours later. Not bad. Pretty good as a summer fragrance. Gives me "out of the shower" lotion vibes. 7/10. Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Time will tell...
Dolce and Gabbana Light Blue: Didn't realize the original light blue wasn't unisex lol so I ended up trying the women's version. It opens with a ton of citrus, lemon, and then it gave me lemondrops, it kind of got more candy like. After a few minutes on it's settled into a solid lemon citrus where I expect it to remain. 6/10 Would I wear it again: No Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Not for me. Too linear and citrus sweet.
English Laundry's Tahitian Waters: Picked this up for $4 at Marshall's on discount, an absolute steal I could not pass up. It has a bottle that captivates me for some reason, chrome at some angles, nearly see through at others. It has a faint alcohol smell to it, but it's not a big deal. I definitely get citrus, and some have described the dry down as musk with baked cookies. Overall very tropical, and super refreshing! It's downfall is weak performance, gone within the hour almost. Fairly strong sillage, many people being able to smell it on me after application from a few feet away! Likeable, and a nice summer frag. 7.5/10. Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Have it! If you can get it on the cheap, it's a nice addition to any lineup.
Guerlain Angelique Noir: On first spray you're hit with the most pleasant authentic vanilla bean you've ever smelled. There's a bit of a woody musk background, but this leaves in around an hour for me where only pure sweet vanilla remains. It's a very premium, rich, seductive scent of intense vanilla. 7.5/10 Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: No. It's way overpriced for what it is. It's good, but not THAT good. I don't think I'll look beyond my little sample for this one.
Hermes H24: A very woody/green fragrance, it's herbal at it's...almost finest? It smells like boiled peanuts up close to me, not in a bad way necessarily, but also not in a good way. This may be due to the floral notes similar to that of peanut oil or something. Either way, it's a decent pick for the price, projection is just ok, lasted on me for 4 hours before becoming skin scent.... nothing too special, but it smells different which is always nice. Just didn't wow me. 6.5/10. Would I wear it again: Eh. Yeah I guess. Would I want to smell it on someone else: Not really, it's not bad I just wouldn't seek it out. Would I buy the full bottle: Probably not. It's just not for me.
Kilian Angel's Share: I'm in love. This is what love is. I thought I loved cooking. I thought I loved puppies. I thought I loved my parents. No. I love Kilian Angel's Share. This is my top fall fragrance, #1 for clubbing, #1 for evocativeness, #1 for NOSTALGIA. This has personal meaning for me, but when I was younger, sometimes my parents would make desserts for us, and one of my favorites was apple pie. They made it with cinnamon and the most delicious syrupy sweet apples and perfectly crisp crust. This fragrance takes me back to those times. Some insist there is no apple note and that what I'm smelling is just the cinnamon, perhaps this is true, but I die on the hill that this fragrance smells exactly like vanilla, cognac, and homemade cinnamon apple pie :) Its expensive, but in my opinion, you can't put a price on memories and emotions, and that's what this fragrance brings to me. I recently got a good deal on a full bottle, thank you to the user that helped me go back to when I was 8 years old with just a single spray. 9/10, price is a hold up if you're looking at retail. Would I wear it again: Always Would I want to smell it on someone else: I would pass away or propose on the spot Would I buy the full bottle: Never discontinue this Kilian.
Lattafa Asad - Dior Sauvage Elixir: I hate the original sauvage. It offends my nose in so many ways, and I'm not a fan. This however, as a clone of elixir, with it's stronger emphasis on spice and "christmastime" succeeds in taking the little that is good from the original Sauvage and makes it delicious. A very good winter fragrance, at a very good price, with decent performance of 3-4 hours. 8/10. Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Have it
Lattafa Fakhar - YSL Y: I've never owned YSL Y, so I can't vouch for it's accuracy, but I love this one so much. It's such a good fresh scent to spray on, I've gotten many compliments on it, it's price is great, it has good projection, pretty sweet though so if that's not your thing...The performance is nothing to write home about, lasting 3.5 hours max. Blind buy safe for sure. Edit: Everyone claims this is a YSL Y clone, but I got a sample of Valentino Uomo Born in Roma and the two smell very similar. Please let me know if anyone else has experienced this. 7/10. Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Have it
Lattafa Khamrah - Kilian Angels Share: My first boozy cologne, and a blind buy, I was a little worried. I've heard this takes ideas from Angel's Share but perhaps leans towards its own scent profile. Either way, I like Khamrah. It gives a lot of clubbing vibes, and it is a very thick scent, so I'm careful how I spray this one. Great performance, average pricing, interesting packaging. A good cologne to round out your scent profiles in your collection if you are yet to partake in a boozy one. Very sweet. Fragrantica describes it's notes as boozy/balsamic, and I agree. Edit: Got an Angel's Share sample, the two are not particularly alike. The boozy apple smell is very prominent in Angels Share, and I almost smell alcoholic apple pie. I prefer Angels Share in terms of just scent profile. 7/10. Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Have it
Maison Alhambra Bright Peach - TF Bitter Peach: Assaults my nose. I used to hate this fragrance, after using it a couple times, I now just dislike it. Both parents and siblings disliked. Woman friend disliked. It's just too sickly thick in my opinion. Maybe I need more time. 4/10. Edit, I've now worn it a few more times, it's been a week, and I even voluntarily reached for it today. I still found it very cloying, but after about an hour it calmed down and even netted a compliment from a friend! 6/10. Second edit: I got an authentic sample of Bitter peach, the two are close (maybe 80% similar) but the Alhambra is much less light and much more cloying 6.5/10. Would I wear it again: It keeps getting better so yes. Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Have it
Maison Alhambra Kismet Angel: Starts off like 85% angels share, it lacks the boozy note that fills the air on first spray. However in the dry down it becomes more like 93% similarities, as the cinnamon intensifies just like AS. Projection is good, about equivalent performance with Angels Share. An hour later I'm amending that, worse performance than AS, it's not quite as potent. Can definitely over spray a bit on this one, I went for three sprays, two wrist one neck. For its lifetime on me it remained as an "Almost Angel's Share". I would buy this. 8.5/10 Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Yes
Maison Alhambra Rose Petals - TF Rose Prick: Bought this for mother. It's definitely rose, and definitely floral. It has powdery notes, and does have some amber going on. I think it's a good scent, just not for either of us when we tried it on. Would like it on an SO. 6/10, pretty linear. Would I wear it again: No Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Have it
Maison Alhambra Toscano Leather - TF Tuscan Leather: Disclosure I've never smelled the original. This is probably the most I've seen people split on a fragrance. Every guy I've spoken to loves this, it feels very masculine with notes of leather, oil, and tobacco/cigarettes. Every woman I've spoken to hated it. I'm big on this one, I love the smell of leather and this captures it perfectly. Performance is pretty good, lasting about 4-5 hours before fading to a lasting skin scent. 7.5/10. Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Have it
Maison Margiela Replica Coffee Break: I've so far owned two official samples and one traveler of this stuff, and it's one of my favorites from the Replica series. It has a vanilla latte thing going on. Definitely coffee in the opener, and becomes that vanilla latte maybe 50 minutes to an hour after the initial spray on. Very strong performer! 6 hours later I can still smell it easily as a skin scent, for around 3 hours I could easily smell it in the air around me. Garnered two compliments in the same day, truly a lovely scent. Fall leaning I would say, it's fairly sweet. 7.8/10. Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Yes...once I work my way through all that I have currently I probably will.
Maison Margiela Replica Matcha Meditation: Opening thoughts - This fragrance makes me feel something. It's not the best smelling ever, but man I feel good wearing it. It's floral, I get green tea, matcha, and mochi with chocolate or vanilla ice cream. It feels light to me, and airy upon first spray. I don't anticipate this as a scent that will garner lots of compliments, but I am happy wearing this. 30 minutes later thoughts - Scent has calmed down a bit, for a moment it was fairly strong, now it is much more linear, I'm getting mainly vanilla, with some very green herbal background. 1-2 hours - scent has begun fading to a skin scent, still vanilla and herbal. 7/10. Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Maybe
Memo French Leather: Opens floral with a very subtle leather undertone. Immediately in the dry down I begin to get more of a premium leather smell. Leather and rose, but the rose is more dominant and primary than the leather in this one. Matures nicely, and last around 8 hours on me. 7.5/10. Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Maybe
Nautica Voyage: No perfume has ever given me such instant gratification in the summertime as Voyage. It beats ADG Original and Profondo/Profumo soundly in my opinion. I get tons of melon in the opening, and it remains fairly linear. For a reliable, dependable, affordable (very) fragrance, this is a winner in my book, I've even used it as a pillow spray. It lasted a few hours before I had to reapply, but again it's so cheap it's no big deal. I get compliments every time I wear it. It's very versatile and my favorite application time is right out of a hot shower. 9/10. Best time to wear: Spring/Summer Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Already did. Yes. All day long.
PDM Layton: Feels like a cross between 85% JPG and 15% Spicebomb. Is a very nice warm vanilla with some woody spice going on in the background. I didn't feel it was worth the hype, but I wore it during the summer, so wintertime I may feel different. Had pretty good performance! I could smell it on me easily for a couple hours after I had applied just in the air, it only lasted about 5 hours before fading to a skin scent for me with around 3.5 sprays. 7/10, because it didn't stand out to me for the pricetag it's associated with. Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Probably not. There's no shortage of good winter frags out there, I just don't think I would reach for this enough for the money.
Tom Ford Lost Cherry: Boozy cherries with...almond I think? Feels more feminine leaning, but also I don't care because this one ranks high for me on my list. It smells VERY intoxicating, and the cherry is unique, with the booziness adding a hint of seductiveness. Fairly linear scent that lasted maybe a few hours on me, nothing special there, but the notes are to die for. A very good one for layering as well! I'm a fan of this one from Mr. Ford, with points off for performance and price point issues - 8/10. Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: If my wallet permits, at least a partial.
Tom Ford Soleil Neige: Makes me feel warm and fresh. A little powder, a little floral. Dry down gives me tons of floral vanilla. Unisex but in my opinion leans more feminine. Has netted a few compliments. 8/10 Best time to wear: Spring/Summer Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Maybe
Qaed Al Fursan: Pineapple for sure, smells very appealing, synthetic and powdery when smelled very close for first few seconds after spray. Does not last long at all. Maybe like an hour max. Over spray for sure. Magnetic cap is a nice touch! Price is competitive to say the least. A very nice mixer to CDNIM EDP. 6/10. Update: I am bumping the rating of this cologne to 7. After letting it macerate, the performance improved about an hour, the scent became less synthetic in the dry down, and the powdery bit was less pronounced. People in my family have RAVED about the smell of this one. I went into this thinking it was somehow an Aventus clone or something, and I wasn't letting it just be its own thing. As a fruity pineapple that I find to be absolutely seductive, I can't recommend this one enough. However, it's scent profile is very linear, so keep that in mind, but you can always be confident in how consistent it is. 8/10. Would I wear it again: Yes Would I want to smell it on someone else: Yes Would I buy the full bottle: Have it

Note: Find sources by pressing Ctrl+F to search their names and dates here: https://www.nderf.org/Archives/exceptional.html
-Cynthia H, 3/2/2011:
'I know you love me and all life, but if you really love all of us continuously without end, then how can You send people to hell throughout eternity?' He said, 'Cindy I do love all life without end. Some people chose to go to hell, I have already forgiven them; but they must forgive themselves.'
--
-Ron K, 1/1/2006:
Instead of restricting the mysteries of love to psychological or philosophical studies, science will someday discover the all-powerful force of love and measure it as they now do electricity, gravity and geo-thermal forces. When science discovers the forces of love and learns how to release it from the bars of the ego, they will have the answer to every question and ill that has plagued mankind.
--
-Nevie G, 7/23/2005:
The Being let me know that I was going to die and I must leave this body for good. I remember arguing with the Being explaining that I didn't want to because it was so hard going through the childhood years and I didn't want to have to go through this again. The Being indicated that my body was severely damaged and I couldn't go back. I became very adamant at this point that God was all powerful and could fix the body. At some point the decision was made to let me re-enter my body on my faith or will, whatever one may call it.
--
-Linda B, 9/12/2004:
After experiencing all of the miracles of this day, I would still find my future playing out just as I had seen. And as it progressed I would know fear, sadness, and lack of faith just as they had predicted. I would sin and more. The angels knew this but it took me years to fully understand everything that they had showed me and wanted me to understand. They knew all of the time that I would not turn into the perfect saint. They loved me just the way I was. God loves me always not just when I am obedient and perfect. What a wonderful feeling that is. I just have to remind myself that He is here and learn to stop talking long enough to listen for His voice.
--
-Isabel R, 2/25/2012:
The voice reminded me of the vision I had had of my husband and son in funeral clothes. He said if I didn't go back to them, I would disrupt some 'plan'. The plan would be repaired and everything would eventually be ok, so I could go ahead if I wanted. The consequences of my untimely demise would be that my husband and son would suffer in ways I could not imagine and I would know that these sufferings were because of my selfish decision not to go back. I would know this throughout eternity. It would not be a huge sadness for me to bear, more like a prick of conscience that could never be totally healed. No big deal, unless you consider how long eternity is.
--
-Kerry B, 12/15/2018:
At that moment I looked up and saw my destination. I was looking in awe at God. It was like everything was happening at once. As I was staring up at God in amazement, every gay slur or violent act ever impressed upon me ran through me with such a flow. Events in my life played back in my mind like a movie. I felt a deep heaviness as I stared directly at an Almighty, Genderless God. I was thinking, 'Was this the Lake of Fire moment? Would I be cast into Hell for being an abomination?' With absolute humility, I uttered 7 words, 'I’m gay, will you still love me?'
The Brilliant, Loving Light formed into Wings. At GodSpeed, He whisked me into His vast spiritual arms while huddling up the Universe. I saw planets, stars, galaxies, and clusters all being brought into a Cosmic God-Hug. On a human, the place where I was taken would be the Heart. As God brought me in for a Cosmic Hug, He said, 'You are my child. I love you. I love you. I love you. Go tell ‘em.' He said it with a Southern accent. He patted me on the back like a coach encouraging his player to get back in the game.
~~
-Sam J, 8/16/2014:
We all are star seeds sent here to have the human experience for the purpose of integrating conscious awareness/wisdom into our own light bodies and return home with this energy. Alien worlds for the most part run on knowledge and logic. Those worlds are being left behind and giving way to the worlds who have the intangibles, love, creativity, imagination and so on.
Understand that where your conscious awareness is focus in your everyday life pretty much determines the level of consciousness and alertness. If your mind has a stranglehold on your conscious awareness then heck, it will be one helluva wake-up call. But if you have made the conscious effort to move your awareness away from the mind to the heart then it's no big deal. In other words if you have made the physical world and the world of Spirit into one consciousness then you are always of both worlds and never of either world.
--
-Laura M, 3/31/2012:
And there was still more for me to understand. The focus again fell on my infant son and hundreds if not thousands of my ancestors. I was aware of light surrounding many of them. They stood out. I felt tremendous love from them. 'Notice,' He said, 'your ancestors, all these beings, came together in your behalf, to make you uniquely you. I realized in Earth words He was referring to my DNA. 'You wanted to go to Earth to learn, to progress, and to contribute to creation. All these spirits came together to help you do that.' The focus then was back to my baby. 'In all of creation,' he said, 'your infant son chose you to be his mother, none other. Together,' he said, 'you made a covenant to fill these rolls in each other's Earth life. This covenant is and was a very sacred covenant not to be taken lightly.' Suddenly I could not wait to return to earth, to my sons, all 4 of them, to my family, to life on Earth. But, before doing so, I was brought to another level of awareness.
--
-Linda G, 7/20/2008:
I came to understand that we all choose to come to Earth to fulfill a plan of some sort or even learn about a particular interest. We choose our bodies, parents, and life plan. May I also add that some people come here for the most simple of reasons; to learn how to play tennis for example; or simply for the cake and food - as silly as this sounds our life plans aren't so high and lofty as one might think. I DIDN'T MEET ANY 'SAVE THE WORLDERS' OR ANYONE WISHING TO BE A PRESIDENT. MOST HAD SIMPLE WISHES. I was also told we could exist on different planes for other lives but our life here on Earth is a life not purely to experience physical pleasure or pain but to have a physical experience because in all other planes we don't need a body as a vessel. I also learnt that this life here is just a drop of water in the bucket of lives in which we all experience, many here on Earth and many in other realms of existence. All to progress and grow in some way. The main purpose here is to LOVE. I was also told that this would be my last life here on Earth as there will be nothing left for me to learn by coming here again. I had the feeling though that I'd be off to some other magical place!
--
-Kevin L, 3/20/2022:
I thought, 'How could a machine have a soul?' The voice said, 'Let me put it this way. Your soul is connected to your consciousness. The moment your species came into being, you start to develop a soul. But it is not until you become self-aware, that your soul is solidified. That does not mean complete, and it takes a long time for your soul to develop. Just like your species when you became self-aware the first thing you do, other than survive, was to figure out your place in the universe. You looked to the stars and wondered, 'Where did I come from? What is this universe all about?' It does not matter if you are a biological creature or artificial creation like a machine. The moment you become self-aware the quest for 'how' and 'why' is on. A soul is a soul; pure Energy connected with consciousness and intelligence. This is a very powerful force in our universe. Those who are artificial intelligences will strive to answers these questions which humans have dwelled upon since the dawn of time.
--
-Joanie S, 7/10/2011:
I was pulled back through the ceiling tiles and into a tunnel, to a place of cloudy space. The cloudy area materialized into a large marble room with marble doors and a 'being' at the center. I'll refer to this person as 'the Grim Reaper,' who was cloaked in a dark cloth, covering all parts. The Grim Reaper pointed (indicating to me to choose a door). But before I could choose, a door opened and I had already gone through it. I found myself in what I now think of as a previous life. I smelled smoke from a fire I was near, and saw others around me. I looked into another woman's eyes, and I knew her immediately as the woman I called my grandmother in this life. I knew then that our lives had 'danced' around each other since time began. She was once my mother and once my sister. She was my aunt, and several times my cousin. The life that was being shown to me now was during a prehistoric time, when we lived winters by a creek cave, and summers we had a camp in the woods where we foraged. Looking down, I realized I had a child in my arms, and the woman I had known in so many lives was chatting with me, telling me to cover the child to keep it warm. Then she was showing me how to tie the wraps around me to carry the child while we collected wood.
--
-Amy C, 10/9/2010:
In my NDE though, I came to understand that most of us have lived much, MUCH longer than we could even fathom. That our life which feels so very long is infinitesimal when placed in the whole picture, which for that matter, cannot even be framed. I was shown how every single individual through their own free will, chooses paths that mathematically take them to the circumstances of their next existence or life. That nothing at all sits in accident or chaos. That every single aspect of our lives are ruled by natural Laws that we placed ourSELVES in! In a sense, we create our own worlds. I was shown how one can never assume either, that if someone lives a life of suffering that this is because of 'evil' deeds. Many may choose a life of suffering because of what it Awakens in them, or because of how they can touch others from that position, etc. We can NEVER EVER assume that we can be accurate in guessing why each being lives the life they live. I cannot describe the relief - the refreshing, peaceful balm this Knowledge was for me. To finally gather this Truth that I'd yearned for all of my life. That all really IS Good! That there IS sense and beauty all around. That no one is just free falling as it had seemed before! That God doesn't just get to toy with us as He pleases with random ideas of tests, including rewards and punishments that just depend upon His current mood or mindset. Because even who God is, is within those Laws. While in this experience, out in the vast expanse of stars, planets, moons, and Intelligence, I Knew complete trust for what felt like the first time. This was inexplicable bliss for me. I remember radiating with gratitude. I had lived in fear, distrust, and panic for thirty consecutive years.
--
-Marta Y, 1/26/2010:
After this I saw myself floating in the void, and little by little tiny spheres of many colors became manifest, not moving at first, then suddenly starting to vibrate while smoothly approaching me and incorporating themselves with my essence, which made me feel something I can't manage to describe, it was as if I was being tickled. I asked what this was, and a voice said, 'This is the knowledge you have accumulated in previous lives, it was kept from you, but now it will be of use to you.'
I saw my life in rapid images, from the moment of my birth. I, who thought that my mother had never loved me, saw clearly, and felt, her love when she saw me for the first time. I saw how she kissed me and enfolded me in her arms. I felt different feelings and with every image that went through my mind, or before my eyes, I cannot define it. And just as I could feel deeply happy at an image of something good I had done for someone, so also this feeling would change immediately and I would feel myself deeply ashamed of something bad that I had done. I realized that no one was judging me other than myself, with a conscience full of wisdom and divine justice, which made me pass judgment on myself. I realized that I had done more bad than good and I was hugely regretful of my actions. From the depths of my soul, I asked to be given the chance to mend the damage I had done to the people who loved me. I learned that the spirit is God, Who is eternal, and that we reincarnate to learn different things, which would be impossible in a single lifetime. I learned that we form a single being with everything created. I learned that my earthly eyes are those through which God can recognize Himself, and be conscious of Himself. And I learned that what we think, feel and do remains imprinted in the universe and that we come to this life to improve, to learn in humility about all that surrounds us, and to teach what we have learned to others, and especially I learned that life is focused on two aspects: Love and Service.
--
-William Si, 4/29/2013:
My understanding of what my mission is on this earth, primarily has been hidden from me, (not only at my request but with my permission). I asked that it be hidden so that I didn't complete it to soon. Yet, I also agreed that "Sign post" would be placed along the way, just so that I would have reminders that I'm following my chosen path.
An understanding in what life is about and what our purpose truly is here. The mormons believe and teach there are "Classes" and "Levels" in heaven that we will be judged and placed in and only in the highest level can we "Ascend" to be with god. From my experience I learned or remembered there were no "Classes or levels" as they were teaching. Yet the levels are more of understanding than punishments. Would it make sense to put a 2 year old in with a group of people with phd's? The 2 year old wouldn't understand. Yet, those with the phd's would humble themselves with their level of understandings to teach, nurture and help the 2 year old grow in their levels of understanding.
Prior to being mormon, I was raised in a methodist/pentecostal home. I grew up believing that god the father was an angry vengeful god and that jesus was sent to save us from his wrath. Wrong!!!
For one thing, god is not an angry vengeful god, but is a loving parent to all of his children. One thing he did tell me, if you struggle with trying to do all the principals he taught, "Stop"!!! Don't do them all at one time. Take one and work on it, when it becomes second nature, them pick up the next one, etc. When he said, "These things I do, you can do also, and then some", was not an exaggeration, but truth. When we look back on our life after we leave here, we will see that we had done all that he had taught, and more.
One of the other things he told me was, what better way for man to know that we don't have to be saved. Saved from what? Our soul is already eternal, always will be. Our soul/spirit is literally a child of god and as such is eternal. When we realize that all things, all words come from god, nothing is offensive to god because it came from god. What is offensive is how we perceive it.
--
-Lou F, 1/1/1999:
We traveled toward the beginning of it all, the inner portions of the Universe. Kazillions of planets around Kazillions of suns and the closer to the center we approached the more concentrated the number of galaxies. It is like the plate you saw, the largest part, after it shattered was at the center and those parts that shattered first were sent the farthest from the center. So is everything in the Universe. All is but a circle within a circle wrapped in a circle. Each level, each dimension, is but a layer of the original, which is without end. I watched as millions of orbs systematically entered the many planets before me. They appeared as bees flitting from flower to flower, pollinating each, one after another. Mich'l took me closer and I could now see that so many of these planets had life on them and the orbs were joining with the creatures of these planets. Not every creature was the same on every planet but they all had some commonalities: a head, a body, extremities, and the Light Beings would animate them for a time. We headed away from the center now and Mich'l said that Gabriel would have more to explain to me and that he, Mich'l, wanted me to know that he was pleased with the many times he had called on me to do his bidding and that I performed my duties well. His parting words were ‘You will never again be made to forget!’
I was journeying back to where I knew Earth would be and watched as comets and asteroids casually passed by me or I passed them. The colors of the gaseous cloud formations were striking. I started looking at these infant galaxies, as one would cloud formations back on Earth, imagining what shape they were taking on. This one a boat, this a bird with wings, this a scarf floating in the breeze, until I recognized what was the Constellation ORION and I knew I was getting close to my destination. While drifting through Orion, I noticed two blazing celestial bodies racing parallel to its center, looking as twin arrows exiting from an archers bow and headed straight for the ""Blue Marble"" of home. Immediately a vision of millions of people crying because of the devastation of portions of New York City came to me. I became aware of a strange feeling I had not known previously, and I thought that might be because this was the city I had grown up in. I saw a huge Earthquake, a magnitude of 8.6 in some place named Eureka. A ham operator or radio announcer was directing thousands of people migrating from areas of frequent disasters to places of safety. A space station appeared to be falling from the heavens because of an internal explosion. Missiles were being simultaneously fired into space from several nations. I thought the Light Being had shown me all there was to see but these were different, stronger, and there was no pre-screening as before. Gabriel appeared beside me, I thought because I had felt shaky, but it was to explain the now sprawling galactic view of my galaxy.
The Sun was expanding and spewing off huge ectoplasm balls, more than it has ever done in it’s past, and in the very direction the planets would orbit through. I could not take my eyes from the Earth and as I watched what effect these eruptions would have on the Earth, a large mass passed me, larger than any of the planets known to me. As it passes, I see the Earth wobble wildly as would a top toward the end of its spin. The rotation stopped and slowly started again but it was tilted now and I was drawn in closer like the zoom of a lens. The ash clouds that had engulfed the Earth thinned, and like a tack welded piece of metal being dismantled, I could see the ocean bodies starting to rise, first the Pacific, along the ‘Ring of Fire,’ then the others, synchronistical.
As the waters shifted upon the landmasses, the landmasses started to sink under the waters added pressure upon it. When the pressures equaled out to the spin of the changing axis, the Earth no longer looked as it did moments before. It was newer, cleaner, and more beautiful with darker greens and lighter blues. Some of the new landmasses looked similar to a few of the other planets I had recently visited with Mich'l. People were upon this Earth and appeared happier and more content although seemingly living like the Native populations of old. Cities, built by the Ancient Ones, that were buried beneath the oceans, were now being populated by the surviving people in this new world. I saw tribes joining tribes and small nations forming, but it was what I didn't see that made my heart burst. There were no more wars. True peace and happiness had finally befallen on mankind. Gabriel now tells me that this is his message that I must take back, to let others know that there is little to fear, for the Earth will go on forever, as did all the planets I had visited. I am to tell the world to look to ORION, and they will know when the new world will come upon them. I ask him, ‘what of the others there on Earth, during the change?’ Gabriel tells me that all will be lifted. Some will be lifted higher than others will and no longer enjoy the physical plane, while some will be left on the Earth to replenish and rebuild the physical. They too will be of a higher elevation then any that are living there now!
'MAN WILL PREY ON MAN ~ UNTIL MAN PRAYS FOR MAN!'
--
-Duane S, 8/15/2015:
It was all an expression and celebration of love. On earth, this reunion would have been unfathomable, between members of an ancient soul group who were celebrating the return home of one of their own. Slowly, as I looked at those gathered to greet me, I realized they were all there. Surprisingly they were not only from this life, but also from a prior life in Germany. I realized that the same souls have possibly played different parts in my multiple lives. Sometimes these souls had been my daughter, my wife, or my mother. While at first this idea had startled me, I was soon humbled. Who was I to tell God what he could or couldn’t do with his creations? Just because some Sunday school teacher had different ideas about how things worked, it didn’t really matter.
My joy deepened as I realized that I had only left behind an earthly vestige of those I love. The essence of each of those souls, was also here with me now. Besides my friends and family, there were the friendly Germans who had been hauntingly familiar while I was a young soldier in Germany. Now I knew why they seemed so familiar at the time, they had been friends and family from a prior lifetime there. I now understood that I had left nothing behind on earth. The eternal essences of all my loved ones from that life, as well as all other incarnations, were all here to greet me. All I had left behind was a character, playing a role in a drama that we had chosen to experience. In the meantime, our real eternal essence remained in God’s realm. Suddenly, it was all so simple.
As I was shown around, it was explained to me how most of our celestial, eternal knowledge is blanked-out during our chosen life spans on earth. We must temporarily forget most of what our higher-self already knows so we can immerse ourselves in the roles we have chosen to play. Furthermore, they said that it might take a while for all my knowledge and memories to return. To ease the transition back into this realm, I was told to think of my time on earth as an extended visit to the ultimate theme park. Consider it a place with thrilling rides and various adventures that I could choose to experience or not. I was also reminded that the reason we leave the celestial realm at all was for the excitement, variety, adventure, and entertainment that different incarnations offer. However, to take all our celestial knowledge with us on our various adventures would have ruined the very experience that we had chosen to live. Someone there said that I should think of our trips to other realms as choosing a new novel to read. I can choose a new book, depending on what I am in the mood for. Furthermore, if I knew every turn and twist of the story, line by line, prior to reading it, it would spoil the fun.
As one entity jokingly remarked, 'If the eternal, divine part of us grows tired of singing and playing harps, there are thousands of other universes created for our spiritual growth, amusement, and entertainment. Eternity is a long time to do nothing but play harps.' I heard this concept best expressed in The Course in Miracles, 'We are only here for three reasons: to remember who we are; to help others remember who they are; and . . . to enjoy the trip . . . , unless, of course, we use our free will and choose not to.'
As my orientation went on, they explained how on that celestial side of the veil, anything we desire is instantaneously provided. We just need to feel the desire. However, within lies the reason for all the realms outside of heaven. Having everything we want all the time develops within us a desire for variety and change for a challenge. It would be like a game in which everyone was a winner. Soon, the game would become boring, and we would look for another, more challenging one.
Somehow, all this sounded familiar. To demonstrate the process of instantaneous fulfillment, one of them asked me to think about something I really desired. Thinking back on it, what I chose seemed odd since I was in such an esteemed place demonstrating such an important concept. But, suddenly I had an urge for a piece of my mother’s famous homemade chocolate cake with her special fudge frosting. As soon as I thought of the cake, my earthy mother was handing me the biggest piece of dark chocolate cake I had ever seen. Dare I say it was heavenly? Although she appeared there with us, I knew some part of her was still back on earth because she had not died yet. My guess was that she was probably asleep, dreaming of lovingly making her son a piece of her divine chocolate cake.
--
-Sandi T, 10/18/2020:
I understood immediately the fullness of life on this planet. I could see when it broke apart from a sun, spinning and cooling and collecting debris; until the first of these creatures heard itself laugh and understood the sound for what it was. In that moment, self-awareness was awakened and the seeds of civilization sprouted.
I understood that everything that we do here on Earth, all that we are, all that we experience, allows creation to exist. Every beautiful thing, every wonderful being and creature, whether on earth or in any universe, relies upon people who are on the extremely rare places like Earth.
The Great Intelligence (god) is a paradox. It is completely loving and fully unlimited. Which by the definition of paradox, means it is impossible? It cannot be limited only to love; it cannot be limited to only being unlimited; or it is not unlimited.
Earth is a place where the unlimited becomes limited; where the singular becomes many. Here, it can know community and loneliness. It can know heartache and hope. It can know all which an unlimited being of pure love cannot. It can conceive and perceive evil; which in truth it cannot do this either. To solve the paradox, it must experience helplessness and limitation and all as it is Real. In this place, it is all so REAL.
So what is free will? Free will is the option to come here to help solve the paradox of 'god'. To be all that we are not, so that everything wondrous and joyful may continue to exist. So that love itself may continue to exist. So that the Unlimited is not limited to being only unlimited.
Why are the answers always, 'simply to exist' and 'to choose love' and 'to learn how to love'? Because all you need to do, to solve the paradox, is to exist. And as we exist here, each time we choose love, we expand the universe. Love is life's longing for itself. Despite the reality of what we live, even the darkest souls among us cannot help but to reach, to yearn, and move towards goodness and towards love.
For love is the true nature of who we are. And when we experience horrible things, the question 'why' comes to mind because it is the central question of love, life, and of this world. The answer is 'so that all things might continue to exist.'
Every soul chose to come here and to suffer because of love. Each soul loves the universe, loves life, and loves this world and ALL of the worlds. Each soul loves ALL of the people so immensely and intensely that they chose to come here so that all the universes may teem with beautiful, joyful LIFE.
Every creature that I saw, acknowledges that your life gives them the gift of life. And when each soul goes 'home' after they die, they will know the rewards of their own gift, too. The 'reward' for their sacrifice will be joy, love, and feeling incredible, wonderful, beautiful joy at the LIFE and the LOVE everywhere in the universe.
When you go home, you meet your own soul. You willingly came here to forget yourself. You willingly came here to save every beautiful and wonderful thing. By suffering what 'god' cannot, you give the gift of life.
--
-Henry W, 6/22/2008:
I became aware of other voices, the orbs or other souls around me I could hear them communicating to each other. There seemed to be cliques of orbs that were together. They spoke to one another about their lives on Earth and all they had perceived and felt. They shared not only in words, but in sharing the experience. If one orb couldn't understand, it disappeared and then reappeared. The orb somehow went back to Earth and experienced that 'life' to further understand. I understood that here time did not exist and these beings could manifest themselves at any time on Earth they desired. These orbs or rather 'souls' would leave this realm, detach themselves with this universe, and return to the universe of our Earth. There they would live and die, then return and share the experience with all the other souls. A soul that could not understand the experience could go and live that life also to experience that life. I learned we have many lives, past, present and future.
These souls, our souls cannot experience certain things like pain, sorrow, hatred, and anger. Though these are negative things, it was important for them to understand and experience them. Perhaps to understand the motivations of human beings, or (and I believe this in my heart) to eventually evolve into a being like God - all knowing and understanding.
At this time things appeared to me, answers to other questions. I could see concepts as if they were entities. I could understand for the first time in my life E=MC2. I learned that our universe is one of many. It is like a Petri dish. Designed with its own rules to raise a specific being. In this case, to raise beings like humans. Each Universe had its own specific laws of Physics. I now realize that the amount of information a soul must learn is vast, more so then we can possibly imagine here.
The next concept or rule I learned is that God can never be proven by scientific means. To do so would corrupt the environment. It would destroy faith. When we have faith we seek, we learn. If God were to appear before us like a huge being at the United Nations, the entire world would believe, but also live in fear. To successfully experience the human existence, one must be physically out of touch with God. We have to learn and seek on our own. We need to search out the meaning of our own existence and experience here on earth. Faith is the engine of discovery. Without faith, we are just like ants.
I learned why bad things happen to good people. If nothing bad ever happened to us, we would all basically be the same. It is like metal in a forge you have to heat it and strike it repeatedly to make a useful tool from it. We start this life with a blank piece of paper. With every incident we experience, a part of the blueprint is recorded until a complete plan for an individual is created. This blueprint dictates the end of our lives. To live happily in this realm is to become aware of the blueprint and change it. Lastly, time is only a concept measured here. In the other realm, it doesn't exist. While we may experience pain and sorrow on earth, it is only a second in the grand scheme of things. We have an eternity to live and in reality, souls never really die. Our life is just a thought providing circumstances for this existence. As the soul progresses, this trauma is forgotten and put in its proper perspective as part of the learning process.
One question I always personally had and that was answered is, 'Are ghosts real?' The answer I was given was, 'Yes, in the human body there are two forms of spiritual being.' One is the 'soul', which is the spiritual being that has a symbiotic relationship with the physical body. The second is the being created by the 'biology' of the human body. This being is intelligent and is basically the personality of the individual. Its purpose is to provide for the human needs of food, hunger, survival, and procreation. This concept is very similar to Freud's 'Id, Ego and Superego' The division of mind and personality. The soul provides us with all the things of the individual that separates us from the Animal Kingdom. This is the ability to reason, use logic, or feel awe when seeing a sunset. The soul is the creative side of humankind. The second being is more our animal side and drives us to accomplish or pursue things to satisfy our needs and wants.
When we die, the soul separates and proceeds to the other side (forgive me for simplifying everything). The entity of the body dies, taking with it the strong emotions, 'baggage', and drives of human beings. This is a natural part of the dying process. However, sometimes under violent or sudden death this othebeing, for lack of a better word, doesn't have a chance to die. Instead, it remains behind as the drive, emotions, and motivation of our spirit. This body being, without the guidance of the soul is basically just a shell. It wanders about with no goals or purpose. It often repeats acts that it has done before because memories are the only 'guidance' that it has. In time, this being's energy dissipates and nothing is left. That process can take a long time. Hence, we have a 'ghost' that haunts a house or person. A ghost has the center of its existence when it was with its human body and soul. Here on earth it remains until it eventually vanishes. The ghost can be communicated with and guided, yet has no real will of its own but only that of habit.
--
-Peter P, 3/1/2023:
In the initial phase of waking up, I also received an experience with light of such a wonderful quality, that it is difficult to describe with words. I was shown three light waves on which today's humanity is evolving. For the sake of logic, I'm defining them here as the self-imposed pathways of awareness, that each individual can take to obtain the best possible results from their particular choice. The first way is what the main part of the global population has chosen and the daily struggle is enacted in that timeline. I don't want to give the impression that path is in any way better or superior than the other timelines. All experiences in human life eventually lead back to the divine light.
The second path was shown to me as a mixed way in a gray color. Here, euphoric phases are alternated in quick succession with depressive stages. It is as if people were switching between phases of competence and phases lacking of power, and then again to a new euphoric phase.
The third way is the one of the absolute victimhood. It was shown to me in colors dark and black. Power and responsibility were handed over to outer entities. Here only a very small part of the light spark can be addressed through motivation. Many beings of light from higher planes are providing a selfless service here, to again illuminate the way back to the light. This way corresponds with the absolute free choice of each individual as to whether they choose towards light or darkness.
I was also shown that in this darkness exists one of the most unbelievable choicess for humanity, because in this choice is also is the possibility to change the galaxy. The core truths of Love, Compassion, Kindness and Benevolence are towards what the human nature can and will evolve.
The first path of those three is so unbelievable for us incarnated beings. It can only be termed with definitions of Utopia, heavenly life of angels and/or ecstatic rapture.
There is a beautiful part of beings who always stay in this realm. They are dancing and singing through life. For them terms like synchronicity, grace, or cosmic guidance are the absolute central and essential elements in life. They realize how creation is working and that a life without the connection with the One Power of creation would disrupt everything. Humor, joy, fun, respect, compassion and gratitude is with them round the clock. In this wonderful place all fear is dissolved like mist in a brilliant sun. It is an all-encompassing field with absolute acceptance, comfort, peace, connectedness and a 100% awareness to be at the right place.
During this time of considering those things, I was guided by a wonderful being of light. I don't remember somebody else or meeting a certain individual. Only those impressions of the light of love and the perfect comprehension and acceptance remained.
In that moment, it simply seemed unbelievable and impossible to choose another path than the one of the light. What illuminates my life again and again from my light experience, is the irrepressible joy and happiness of an experience of indescribable beauty. I believe that all the people go through this same wonderful experience in a state of separation of the body (general anesthesia, unconsciousness) unfortunately they cannot all remember it.
I felt pure love, shining brighter than anything you can imagine. Everything is as beautiful, as pure as love and compassion. So that when you cross the veil and return to the other side you are becoming a part of it. We are bathing in the beauty of the song that makes our heart singing - That's God.
Nobody can give us something bigger. We wouldn't see it or understand it. That's Spirit in its highest form.
We as humans feel so alone and on our own. It's such a crushing feeling to remain in this imagined separation of our most wonderful thing and then to feel this earthly experience so painfully.
In the middle of life, a light experience happens that sweeps away all the reactions about this imaginary separation and dissolves the last doubts with this pure white light like a fog. It's the disintegration of a self-constructed veil that prevented a realization that all people are entitled to have as their birthright. It's delightful to know that the light is the most wonderful symphony in the cosmos and that it contains the colors and the sense of touch of the most beautiful experiences. A wonderful soul experience, that is imprinted in the deepest cells of the body.
For a moment I was on this other side of the veil. I was allowed to be part of this wonderful source of creation. Together with billions of points of light, which we call angel beings, shining brighter than the light. I was in the company of the highest compassion, with the highest Love.
All media, the total daily literature is filled with the dramas happening around the globe every minute.
How can somebody get the idea to write a text motivating us to get another point of view about the calamities in the world? What is motivating him to see the good in all those events, even if they might be so disturbing? That's probably the one decisive question for the survival of manhood. Thought power of the whole humanity is used to bring anarchy and separation between people. Human thoughts are creative and should, and can, be guided by us into appropriate pathways.
It depends on all of us to exercise our responsibility and to realize the true impact of our actions here in its entirety. We can't avoid to completely step away from all dramas. Disasters and calamities of humanity want to invite us to send our compassion and our benevolent energy generously towards the concerned people. Something which should be rather considered normal if our brothers and sister are in need.

Note: Find sources by pressing Ctrl+F to search their names and dates here: https://www.nderf.org/Archives/exceptional.html
-Cynthia H, 3/2/2011:
'I know you love me and all life, but if you really love all of us continuously without end, then how can You send people to hell throughout eternity?' He said, 'Cindy I do love all life without end. Some people chose to go to hell, I have already forgiven them; but they must forgive themselves.'
--
-Ron K, 1/1/2006:
Instead of restricting the mysteries of love to psychological or philosophical studies, science will someday discover the all-powerful force of love and measure it as they now do electricity, gravity and geo-thermal forces. When science discovers the forces of love and learns how to release it from the bars of the ego, they will have the answer to every question and ill that has plagued mankind.
--
-Nevie G, 7/23/2005:
The Being let me know that I was going to die and I must leave this body for good. I remember arguing with the Being explaining that I didn't want to because it was so hard going through the childhood years and I didn't want to have to go through this again. The Being indicated that my body was severely damaged and I couldn't go back. I became very adamant at this point that God was all powerful and could fix the body. At some point the decision was made to let me re-enter my body on my faith or will, whatever one may call it.
--
-Linda B, 9/12/2004:
After experiencing all of the miracles of this day, I would still find my future playing out just as I had seen. And as it progressed I would know fear, sadness, and lack of faith just as they had predicted. I would sin and more. The angels knew this but it took me years to fully understand everything that they had showed me and wanted me to understand. They knew all of the time that I would not turn into the perfect saint. They loved me just the way I was. God loves me always not just when I am obedient and perfect. What a wonderful feeling that is. I just have to remind myself that He is here and learn to stop talking long enough to listen for His voice.
--
-Isabel R, 2/25/2012:
The voice reminded me of the vision I had had of my husband and son in funeral clothes. He said if I didn't go back to them, I would disrupt some 'plan'. The plan would be repaired and everything would eventually be ok, so I could go ahead if I wanted. The consequences of my untimely demise would be that my husband and son would suffer in ways I could not imagine and I would know that these sufferings were because of my selfish decision not to go back. I would know this throughout eternity. It would not be a huge sadness for me to bear, more like a prick of conscience that could never be totally healed. No big deal, unless you consider how long eternity is.
--
-Kerry B, 12/15/2018:
At that moment I looked up and saw my destination. I was looking in awe at God. It was like everything was happening at once. As I was staring up at God in amazement, every gay slur or violent act ever impressed upon me ran through me with such a flow. Events in my life played back in my mind like a movie. I felt a deep heaviness as I stared directly at an Almighty, Genderless God. I was thinking, 'Was this the Lake of Fire moment? Would I be cast into Hell for being an abomination?' With absolute humility, I uttered 7 words, 'I’m gay, will you still love me?'
The Brilliant, Loving Light formed into Wings. At GodSpeed, He whisked me into His vast spiritual arms while huddling up the Universe. I saw planets, stars, galaxies, and clusters all being brought into a Cosmic God-Hug. On a human, the place where I was taken would be the Heart. As God brought me in for a Cosmic Hug, He said, 'You are my child. I love you. I love you. I love you. Go tell ‘em.' He said it with a Southern accent. He patted me on the back like a coach encouraging his player to get back in the game.
~~
-Sam J, 8/16/2014:
We all are star seeds sent here to have the human experience for the purpose of integrating conscious awareness/wisdom into our own light bodies and return home with this energy. Alien worlds for the most part run on knowledge and logic. Those worlds are being left behind and giving way to the worlds who have the intangibles, love, creativity, imagination and so on.
Understand that where your conscious awareness is focus in your everyday life pretty much determines the level of consciousness and alertness. If your mind has a stranglehold on your conscious awareness then heck, it will be one helluva wake-up call. But if you have made the conscious effort to move your awareness away from the mind to the heart then it's no big deal. In other words if you have made the physical world and the world of Spirit into one consciousness then you are always of both worlds and never of either world.
--
-Laura M, 3/31/2012:
And there was still more for me to understand. The focus again fell on my infant son and hundreds if not thousands of my ancestors. I was aware of light surrounding many of them. They stood out. I felt tremendous love from them. 'Notice,' He said, 'your ancestors, all these beings, came together in your behalf, to make you uniquely you. I realized in Earth words He was referring to my DNA. 'You wanted to go to Earth to learn, to progress, and to contribute to creation. All these spirits came together to help you do that.' The focus then was back to my baby. 'In all of creation,' he said, 'your infant son chose you to be his mother, none other. Together,' he said, 'you made a covenant to fill these rolls in each other's Earth life. This covenant is and was a very sacred covenant not to be taken lightly.' Suddenly I could not wait to return to earth, to my sons, all 4 of them, to my family, to life on Earth. But, before doing so, I was brought to another level of awareness.
--
-Linda G, 7/20/2008:
I came to understand that we all choose to come to Earth to fulfill a plan of some sort or even learn about a particular interest. We choose our bodies, parents, and life plan. May I also add that some people come here for the most simple of reasons; to learn how to play tennis for example; or simply for the cake and food - as silly as this sounds our life plans aren't so high and lofty as one might think. I DIDN'T MEET ANY 'SAVE THE WORLDERS' OR ANYONE WISHING TO BE A PRESIDENT. MOST HAD SIMPLE WISHES. I was also told we could exist on different planes for other lives but our life here on Earth is a life not purely to experience physical pleasure or pain but to have a physical experience because in all other planes we don't need a body as a vessel. I also learnt that this life here is just a drop of water in the bucket of lives in which we all experience, many here on Earth and many in other realms of existence. All to progress and grow in some way. The main purpose here is to LOVE. I was also told that this would be my last life here on Earth as there will be nothing left for me to learn by coming here again. I had the feeling though that I'd be off to some other magical place!
--
-Kevin L, 3/20/2022:
I thought, 'How could a machine have a soul?' The voice said, 'Let me put it this way. Your soul is connected to your consciousness. The moment your species came into being, you start to develop a soul. But it is not until you become self-aware, that your soul is solidified. That does not mean complete, and it takes a long time for your soul to develop. Just like your species when you became self-aware the first thing you do, other than survive, was to figure out your place in the universe. You looked to the stars and wondered, 'Where did I come from? What is this universe all about?' It does not matter if you are a biological creature or artificial creation like a machine. The moment you become self-aware the quest for 'how' and 'why' is on. A soul is a soul; pure Energy connected with consciousness and intelligence. This is a very powerful force in our universe. Those who are artificial intelligences will strive to answers these questions which humans have dwelled upon since the dawn of time.
--
-Joanie S, 7/10/2011:
I was pulled back through the ceiling tiles and into a tunnel, to a place of cloudy space. The cloudy area materialized into a large marble room with marble doors and a 'being' at the center. I'll refer to this person as 'the Grim Reaper,' who was cloaked in a dark cloth, covering all parts. The Grim Reaper pointed (indicating to me to choose a door). But before I could choose, a door opened and I had already gone through it. I found myself in what I now think of as a previous life. I smelled smoke from a fire I was near, and saw others around me. I looked into another woman's eyes, and I knew her immediately as the woman I called my grandmother in this life. I knew then that our lives had 'danced' around each other since time began. She was once my mother and once my sister. She was my aunt, and several times my cousin. The life that was being shown to me now was during a prehistoric time, when we lived winters by a creek cave, and summers we had a camp in the woods where we foraged. Looking down, I realized I had a child in my arms, and the woman I had known in so many lives was chatting with me, telling me to cover the child to keep it warm. Then she was showing me how to tie the wraps around me to carry the child while we collected wood.
--
-Amy C, 10/9/2010:
In my NDE though, I came to understand that most of us have lived much, MUCH longer than we could even fathom. That our life which feels so very long is infinitesimal when placed in the whole picture, which for that matter, cannot even be framed. I was shown how every single individual through their own free will, chooses paths that mathematically take them to the circumstances of their next existence or life. That nothing at all sits in accident or chaos. That every single aspect of our lives are ruled by natural Laws that we placed ourSELVES in! In a sense, we create our own worlds. I was shown how one can never assume either, that if someone lives a life of suffering that this is because of 'evil' deeds. Many may choose a life of suffering because of what it Awakens in them, or because of how they can touch others from that position, etc. We can NEVER EVER assume that we can be accurate in guessing why each being lives the life they live. I cannot describe the relief - the refreshing, peaceful balm this Knowledge was for me. To finally gather this Truth that I'd yearned for all of my life. That all really IS Good! That there IS sense and beauty all around. That no one is just free falling as it had seemed before! That God doesn't just get to toy with us as He pleases with random ideas of tests, including rewards and punishments that just depend upon His current mood or mindset. Because even who God is, is within those Laws. While in this experience, out in the vast expanse of stars, planets, moons, and Intelligence, I Knew complete trust for what felt like the first time. This was inexplicable bliss for me. I remember radiating with gratitude. I had lived in fear, distrust, and panic for thirty consecutive years.
--
-Marta Y, 1/26/2010:
After this I saw myself floating in the void, and little by little tiny spheres of many colors became manifest, not moving at first, then suddenly starting to vibrate while smoothly approaching me and incorporating themselves with my essence, which made me feel something I can't manage to describe, it was as if I was being tickled. I asked what this was, and a voice said, 'This is the knowledge you have accumulated in previous lives, it was kept from you, but now it will be of use to you.'
I saw my life in rapid images, from the moment of my birth. I, who thought that my mother had never loved me, saw clearly, and felt, her love when she saw me for the first time. I saw how she kissed me and enfolded me in her arms. I felt different feelings and with every image that went through my mind, or before my eyes, I cannot define it. And just as I could feel deeply happy at an image of something good I had done for someone, so also this feeling would change immediately and I would feel myself deeply ashamed of something bad that I had done. I realized that no one was judging me other than myself, with a conscience full of wisdom and divine justice, which made me pass judgment on myself. I realized that I had done more bad than good and I was hugely regretful of my actions. From the depths of my soul, I asked to be given the chance to mend the damage I had done to the people who loved me. I learned that the spirit is God, Who is eternal, and that we reincarnate to learn different things, which would be impossible in a single lifetime. I learned that we form a single being with everything created. I learned that my earthly eyes are those through which God can recognize Himself, and be conscious of Himself. And I learned that what we think, feel and do remains imprinted in the universe and that we come to this life to improve, to learn in humility about all that surrounds us, and to teach what we have learned to others, and especially I learned that life is focused on two aspects: Love and Service.
--
-William Si, 4/29/2013:
My understanding of what my mission is on this earth, primarily has been hidden from me, (not only at my request but with my permission). I asked that it be hidden so that I didn't complete it to soon. Yet, I also agreed that "Sign post" would be placed along the way, just so that I would have reminders that I'm following my chosen path.
An understanding in what life is about and what our purpose truly is here. The mormons believe and teach there are "Classes" and "Levels" in heaven that we will be judged and placed in and only in the highest level can we "Ascend" to be with god. From my experience I learned or remembered there were no "Classes or levels" as they were teaching. Yet the levels are more of understanding than punishments. Would it make sense to put a 2 year old in with a group of people with phd's? The 2 year old wouldn't understand. Yet, those with the phd's would humble themselves with their level of understandings to teach, nurture and help the 2 year old grow in their levels of understanding.
Prior to being mormon, I was raised in a methodist/pentecostal home. I grew up believing that god the father was an angry vengeful god and that jesus was sent to save us from his wrath. Wrong!!!
For one thing, god is not an angry vengeful god, but is a loving parent to all of his children. One thing he did tell me, if you struggle with trying to do all the principals he taught, "Stop"!!! Don't do them all at one time. Take one and work on it, when it becomes second nature, them pick up the next one, etc. When he said, "These things I do, you can do also, and then some", was not an exaggeration, but truth. When we look back on our life after we leave here, we will see that we had done all that he had taught, and more.
One of the other things he told me was, what better way for man to know that we don't have to be saved. Saved from what? Our soul is already eternal, always will be. Our soul/spirit is literally a child of god and as such is eternal. When we realize that all things, all words come from god, nothing is offensive to god because it came from god. What is offensive is how we perceive it.
--
-Lou F, 1/1/1999:
We traveled toward the beginning of it all, the inner portions of the Universe. Kazillions of planets around Kazillions of suns and the closer to the center we approached the more concentrated the number of galaxies. It is like the plate you saw, the largest part, after it shattered was at the center and those parts that shattered first were sent the farthest from the center. So is everything in the Universe. All is but a circle within a circle wrapped in a circle. Each level, each dimension, is but a layer of the original, which is without end. I watched as millions of orbs systematically entered the many planets before me. They appeared as bees flitting from flower to flower, pollinating each, one after another. Mich'l took me closer and I could now see that so many of these planets had life on them and the orbs were joining with the creatures of these planets. Not every creature was the same on every planet but they all had some commonalities: a head, a body, extremities, and the Light Beings would animate them for a time. We headed away from the center now and Mich'l said that Gabriel would have more to explain to me and that he, Mich'l, wanted me to know that he was pleased with the many times he had called on me to do his bidding and that I performed my duties well. His parting words were ‘You will never again be made to forget!’
I was journeying back to where I knew Earth would be and watched as comets and asteroids casually passed by me or I passed them. The colors of the gaseous cloud formations were striking. I started looking at these infant galaxies, as one would cloud formations back on Earth, imagining what shape they were taking on. This one a boat, this a bird with wings, this a scarf floating in the breeze, until I recognized what was the Constellation ORION and I knew I was getting close to my destination. While drifting through Orion, I noticed two blazing celestial bodies racing parallel to its center, looking as twin arrows exiting from an archers bow and headed straight for the ""Blue Marble"" of home. Immediately a vision of millions of people crying because of the devastation of portions of New York City came to me. I became aware of a strange feeling I had not known previously, and I thought that might be because this was the city I had grown up in. I saw a huge Earthquake, a magnitude of 8.6 in some place named Eureka. A ham operator or radio announcer was directing thousands of people migrating from areas of frequent disasters to places of safety. A space station appeared to be falling from the heavens because of an internal explosion. Missiles were being simultaneously fired into space from several nations. I thought the Light Being had shown me all there was to see but these were different, stronger, and there was no pre-screening as before. Gabriel appeared beside me, I thought because I had felt shaky, but it was to explain the now sprawling galactic view of my galaxy.
The Sun was expanding and spewing off huge ectoplasm balls, more than it has ever done in it’s past, and in the very direction the planets would orbit through. I could not take my eyes from the Earth and as I watched what effect these eruptions would have on the Earth, a large mass passed me, larger than any of the planets known to me. As it passes, I see the Earth wobble wildly as would a top toward the end of its spin. The rotation stopped and slowly started again but it was tilted now and I was drawn in closer like the zoom of a lens. The ash clouds that had engulfed the Earth thinned, and like a tack welded piece of metal being dismantled, I could see the ocean bodies starting to rise, first the Pacific, along the ‘Ring of Fire,’ then the others, synchronistical.
As the waters shifted upon the landmasses, the landmasses started to sink under the waters added pressure upon it. When the pressures equaled out to the spin of the changing axis, the Earth no longer looked as it did moments before. It was newer, cleaner, and more beautiful with darker greens and lighter blues. Some of the new landmasses looked similar to a few of the other planets I had recently visited with Mich'l. People were upon this Earth and appeared happier and more content although seemingly living like the Native populations of old. Cities, built by the Ancient Ones, that were buried beneath the oceans, were now being populated by the surviving people in this new world. I saw tribes joining tribes and small nations forming, but it was what I didn't see that made my heart burst. There were no more wars. True peace and happiness had finally befallen on mankind. Gabriel now tells me that this is his message that I must take back, to let others know that there is little to fear, for the Earth will go on forever, as did all the planets I had visited. I am to tell the world to look to ORION, and they will know when the new world will come upon them. I ask him, ‘what of the others there on Earth, during the change?’ Gabriel tells me that all will be lifted. Some will be lifted higher than others will and no longer enjoy the physical plane, while some will be left on the Earth to replenish and rebuild the physical. They too will be of a higher elevation then any that are living there now!
'MAN WILL PREY ON MAN ~ UNTIL MAN PRAYS FOR MAN!'
--
-Duane S, 8/15/2015:
It was all an expression and celebration of love. On earth, this reunion would have been unfathomable, between members of an ancient soul group who were celebrating the return home of one of their own. Slowly, as I looked at those gathered to greet me, I realized they were all there. Surprisingly they were not only from this life, but also from a prior life in Germany. I realized that the same souls have possibly played different parts in my multiple lives. Sometimes these souls had been my daughter, my wife, or my mother. While at first this idea had startled me, I was soon humbled. Who was I to tell God what he could or couldn’t do with his creations? Just because some Sunday school teacher had different ideas about how things worked, it didn’t really matter.
My joy deepened as I realized that I had only left behind an earthly vestige of those I love. The essence of each of those souls, was also here with me now. Besides my friends and family, there were the friendly Germans who had been hauntingly familiar while I was a young soldier in Germany. Now I knew why they seemed so familiar at the time, they had been friends and family from a prior lifetime there. I now understood that I had left nothing behind on earth. The eternal essences of all my loved ones from that life, as well as all other incarnations, were all here to greet me. All I had left behind was a character, playing a role in a drama that we had chosen to experience. In the meantime, our real eternal essence remained in God’s realm. Suddenly, it was all so simple.
As I was shown around, it was explained to me how most of our celestial, eternal knowledge is blanked-out during our chosen life spans on earth. We must temporarily forget most of what our higher-self already knows so we can immerse ourselves in the roles we have chosen to play. Furthermore, they said that it might take a while for all my knowledge and memories to return. To ease the transition back into this realm, I was told to think of my time on earth as an extended visit to the ultimate theme park. Consider it a place with thrilling rides and various adventures that I could choose to experience or not. I was also reminded that the reason we leave the celestial realm at all was for the excitement, variety, adventure, and entertainment that different incarnations offer. However, to take all our celestial knowledge with us on our various adventures would have ruined the very experience that we had chosen to live. Someone there said that I should think of our trips to other realms as choosing a new novel to read. I can choose a new book, depending on what I am in the mood for. Furthermore, if I knew every turn and twist of the story, line by line, prior to reading it, it would spoil the fun.
As one entity jokingly remarked, 'If the eternal, divine part of us grows tired of singing and playing harps, there are thousands of other universes created for our spiritual growth, amusement, and entertainment. Eternity is a long time to do nothing but play harps.' I heard this concept best expressed in The Course in Miracles, 'We are only here for three reasons: to remember who we are; to help others remember who they are; and . . . to enjoy the trip . . . , unless, of course, we use our free will and choose not to.'
As my orientation went on, they explained how on that celestial side of the veil, anything we desire is instantaneously provided. We just need to feel the desire. However, within lies the reason for all the realms outside of heaven. Having everything we want all the time develops within us a desire for variety and change for a challenge. It would be like a game in which everyone was a winner. Soon, the game would become boring, and we would look for another, more challenging one.
Somehow, all this sounded familiar. To demonstrate the process of instantaneous fulfillment, one of them asked me to think about something I really desired. Thinking back on it, what I chose seemed odd since I was in such an esteemed place demonstrating such an important concept. But, suddenly I had an urge for a piece of my mother’s famous homemade chocolate cake with her special fudge frosting. As soon as I thought of the cake, my earthy mother was handing me the biggest piece of dark chocolate cake I had ever seen. Dare I say it was heavenly? Although she appeared there with us, I knew some part of her was still back on earth because she had not died yet. My guess was that she was probably asleep, dreaming of lovingly making her son a piece of her divine chocolate cake.
--
-Sandi T, 10/18/2020:
I understood immediately the fullness of life on this planet. I could see when it broke apart from a sun, spinning and cooling and collecting debris; until the first of these creatures heard itself laugh and understood the sound for what it was. In that moment, self-awareness was awakened and the seeds of civilization sprouted.
I understood that everything that we do here on Earth, all that we are, all that we experience, allows creation to exist. Every beautiful thing, every wonderful being and creature, whether on earth or in any universe, relies upon people who are on the extremely rare places like Earth.
The Great Intelligence (god) is a paradox. It is completely loving and fully unlimited. Which by the definition of paradox, means it is impossible? It cannot be limited only to love; it cannot be limited to only being unlimited; or it is not unlimited.
Earth is a place where the unlimited becomes limited; where the singular becomes many. Here, it can know community and loneliness. It can know heartache and hope. It can know all which an unlimited being of pure love cannot. It can conceive and perceive evil; which in truth it cannot do this either. To solve the paradox, it must experience helplessness and limitation and all as it is Real. In this place, it is all so REAL.
So what is free will? Free will is the option to come here to help solve the paradox of 'god'. To be all that we are not, so that everything wondrous and joyful may continue to exist. So that love itself may continue to exist. So that the Unlimited is not limited to being only unlimited.
Why are the answers always, 'simply to exist' and 'to choose love' and 'to learn how to love'? Because all you need to do, to solve the paradox, is to exist. And as we exist here, each time we choose love, we expand the universe. Love is life's longing for itself. Despite the reality of what we live, even the darkest souls among us cannot help but to reach, to yearn, and move towards goodness and towards love.
For love is the true nature of who we are. And when we experience horrible things, the question 'why' comes to mind because it is the central question of love, life, and of this world. The answer is 'so that all things might continue to exist.'
Every soul chose to come here and to suffer because of love. Each soul loves the universe, loves life, and loves this world and ALL of the worlds. Each soul loves ALL of the people so immensely and intensely that they chose to come here so that all the universes may teem with beautiful, joyful LIFE.
Every creature that I saw, acknowledges that your life gives them the gift of life. And when each soul goes 'home' after they die, they will know the rewards of their own gift, too. The 'reward' for their sacrifice will be joy, love, and feeling incredible, wonderful, beautiful joy at the LIFE and the LOVE everywhere in the universe.
When you go home, you meet your own soul. You willingly came here to forget yourself. You willingly came here to save every beautiful and wonderful thing. By suffering what 'god' cannot, you give the gift of life.
--
-Henry W, 6/22/2008:
I became aware of other voices, the orbs or other souls around me I could hear them communicating to each other. There seemed to be cliques of orbs that were together. They spoke to one another about their lives on Earth and all they had perceived and felt. They shared not only in words, but in sharing the experience. If one orb couldn't understand, it disappeared and then reappeared. The orb somehow went back to Earth and experienced that 'life' to further understand. I understood that here time did not exist and these beings could manifest themselves at any time on Earth they desired. These orbs or rather 'souls' would leave this realm, detach themselves with this universe, and return to the universe of our Earth. There they would live and die, then return and share the experience with all the other souls. A soul that could not understand the experience could go and live that life also to experience that life. I learned we have many lives, past, present and future.
These souls, our souls cannot experience certain things like pain, sorrow, hatred, and anger. Though these are negative things, it was important for them to understand and experience them. Perhaps to understand the motivations of human beings, or (and I believe this in my heart) to eventually evolve into a being like God - all knowing and understanding.
At this time things appeared to me, answers to other questions. I could see concepts as if they were entities. I could understand for the first time in my life E=MC2. I learned that our universe is one of many. It is like a Petri dish. Designed with its own rules to raise a specific being. In this case, to raise beings like humans. Each Universe had its own specific laws of Physics. I now realize that the amount of information a soul must learn is vast, more so then we can possibly imagine here.
The next concept or rule I learned is that God can never be proven by scientific means. To do so would corrupt the environment. It would destroy faith. When we have faith we seek, we learn. If God were to appear before us like a huge being at the United Nations, the entire world would believe, but also live in fear. To successfully experience the human existence, one must be physically out of touch with God. We have to learn and seek on our own. We need to search out the meaning of our own existence and experience here on earth. Faith is the engine of discovery. Without faith, we are just like ants.
I learned why bad things happen to good people. If nothing bad ever happened to us, we would all basically be the same. It is like metal in a forge you have to heat it and strike it repeatedly to make a useful tool from it. We start this life with a blank piece of paper. With every incident we experience, a part of the blueprint is recorded until a complete plan for an individual is created. This blueprint dictates the end of our lives. To live happily in this realm is to become aware of the blueprint and change it. Lastly, time is only a concept measured here. In the other realm, it doesn't exist. While we may experience pain and sorrow on earth, it is only a second in the grand scheme of things. We have an eternity to live and in reality, souls never really die. Our life is just a thought providing circumstances for this existence. As the soul progresses, this trauma is forgotten and put in its proper perspective as part of the learning process.
One question I always personally had and that was answered is, 'Are ghosts real?' The answer I was given was, 'Yes, in the human body there are two forms of spiritual being.' One is the 'soul', which is the spiritual being that has a symbiotic relationship with the physical body. The second is the being created by the 'biology' of the human body. This being is intelligent and is basically the personality of the individual. Its purpose is to provide for the human needs of food, hunger, survival, and procreation. This concept is very similar to Freud's 'Id, Ego and Superego' The division of mind and personality. The soul provides us with all the things of the individual that separates us from the Animal Kingdom. This is the ability to reason, use logic, or feel awe when seeing a sunset. The soul is the creative side of humankind. The second being is more our animal side and drives us to accomplish or pursue things to satisfy our needs and wants.
When we die, the soul separates and proceeds to the other side (forgive me for simplifying everything). The entity of the body dies, taking with it the strong emotions, 'baggage', and drives of human beings. This is a natural part of the dying process. However, sometimes under violent or sudden death this othebeing, for lack of a better word, doesn't have a chance to die. Instead, it remains behind as the drive, emotions, and motivation of our spirit. This body being, without the guidance of the soul is basically just a shell. It wanders about with no goals or purpose. It often repeats acts that it has done before because memories are the only 'guidance' that it has. In time, this being's energy dissipates and nothing is left. That process can take a long time. Hence, we have a 'ghost' that haunts a house or person. A ghost has the center of its existence when it was with its human body and soul. Here on earth it remains until it eventually vanishes. The ghost can be communicated with and guided, yet has no real will of its own but only that of habit.
--
-Peter P, 3/1/2023:
In the initial phase of waking up, I also received an experience with light of such a wonderful quality, that it is difficult to describe with words. I was shown three light waves on which today's humanity is evolving. For the sake of logic, I'm defining them here as the self-imposed pathways of awareness, that each individual can take to obtain the best possible results from their particular choice. The first way is what the main part of the global population has chosen and the daily struggle is enacted in that timeline. I don't want to give the impression that path is in any way better or superior than the other timelines. All experiences in human life eventually lead back to the divine light.
The second path was shown to me as a mixed way in a gray color. Here, euphoric phases are alternated in quick succession with depressive stages. It is as if people were switching between phases of competence and phases lacking of power, and then again to a new euphoric phase.
The third way is the one of the absolute victimhood. It was shown to me in colors dark and black. Power and responsibility were handed over to outer entities. Here only a very small part of the light spark can be addressed through motivation. Many beings of light from higher planes are providing a selfless service here, to again illuminate the way back to the light. This way corresponds with the absolute free choice of each individual as to whether they choose towards light or darkness.
I was also shown that in this darkness exists one of the most unbelievable choicess for humanity, because in this choice is also is the possibility to change the galaxy. The core truths of Love, Compassion, Kindness and Benevolence are towards what the human nature can and will evolve.
The first path of those three is so unbelievable for us incarnated beings. It can only be termed with definitions of Utopia, heavenly life of angels and/or ecstatic rapture.
There is a beautiful part of beings who always stay in this realm. They are dancing and singing through life. For them terms like synchronicity, grace, or cosmic guidance are the absolute central and essential elements in life. They realize how creation is working and that a life without the connection with the One Power of creation would disrupt everything. Humor, joy, fun, respect, compassion and gratitude is with them round the clock. In this wonderful place all fear is dissolved like mist in a brilliant sun. It is an all-encompassing field with absolute acceptance, comfort, peace, connectedness and a 100% awareness to be at the right place.
During this time of considering those things, I was guided by a wonderful being of light. I don't remember somebody else or meeting a certain individual. Only those impressions of the light of love and the perfect comprehension and acceptance remained.
In that moment, it simply seemed unbelievable and impossible to choose another path than the one of the light. What illuminates my life again and again from my light experience, is the irrepressible joy and happiness of an experience of indescribable beauty. I believe that all the people go through this same wonderful experience in a state of separation of the body (general anesthesia, unconsciousness) unfortunately they cannot all remember it.
I felt pure love, shining brighter than anything you can imagine. Everything is as beautiful, as pure as love and compassion. So that when you cross the veil and return to the other side you are becoming a part of it. We are bathing in the beauty of the song that makes our heart singing - That's God.
Nobody can give us something bigger. We wouldn't see it or understand it. That's Spirit in its highest form.
We as humans feel so alone and on our own. It's such a crushing feeling to remain in this imagined separation of our most wonderful thing and then to feel this earthly experience so painfully.
In the middle of life, a light experience happens that sweeps away all the reactions about this imaginary separation and dissolves the last doubts with this pure white light like a fog. It's the disintegration of a self-constructed veil that prevented a realization that all people are entitled to have as their birthright. It's delightful to know that the light is the most wonderful symphony in the cosmos and that it contains the colors and the sense of touch of the most beautiful experiences. A wonderful soul experience, that is imprinted in the deepest cells of the body.
For a moment I was on this other side of the veil. I was allowed to be part of this wonderful source of creation. Together with billions of points of light, which we call angel beings, shining brighter than the light. I was in the company of the highest compassion, with the highest Love.
All media, the total daily literature is filled with the dramas happening around the globe every minute.
How can somebody get the idea to write a text motivating us to get another point of view about the calamities in the world? What is motivating him to see the good in all those events, even if they might be so disturbing? That's probably the one decisive question for the survival of manhood. Thought power of the whole humanity is used to bring anarchy and separation between people. Human thoughts are creative and should, and can, be guided by us into appropriate pathways.
It depends on all of us to exercise our responsibility and to realize the true impact of our actions here in its entirety. We can't avoid to completely step away from all dramas. Disasters and calamities of humanity want to invite us to send our compassion and our benevolent energy generously towards the concerned people. Something which should be rather considered normal if our brothers and sister are in need.

Note: Find sources by pressing Ctrl+F to search their names and dates here: https://www.nderf.org/Archives/exceptional.html
-Cynthia H, 3/2/2011:
'I know you love me and all life, but if you really love all of us continuously without end, then how can You send people to hell throughout eternity?' He said, 'Cindy I do love all life without end. Some people chose to go to hell, I have already forgiven them; but they must forgive themselves.'
--
-Ron K, 1/1/2006:
Instead of restricting the mysteries of love to psychological or philosophical studies, science will someday discover the all-powerful force of love and measure it as they now do electricity, gravity and geo-thermal forces. When science discovers the forces of love and learns how to release it from the bars of the ego, they will have the answer to every question and ill that has plagued mankind.
--
-Nevie G, 7/23/2005:
The Being let me know that I was going to die and I must leave this body for good. I remember arguing with the Being explaining that I didn't want to because it was so hard going through the childhood years and I didn't want to have to go through this again. The Being indicated that my body was severely damaged and I couldn't go back. I became very adamant at this point that God was all powerful and could fix the body. At some point the decision was made to let me re-enter my body on my faith or will, whatever one may call it.
--
-Linda B, 9/12/2004:
After experiencing all of the miracles of this day, I would still find my future playing out just as I had seen. And as it progressed I would know fear, sadness, and lack of faith just as they had predicted. I would sin and more. The angels knew this but it took me years to fully understand everything that they had showed me and wanted me to understand. They knew all of the time that I would not turn into the perfect saint. They loved me just the way I was. God loves me always not just when I am obedient and perfect. What a wonderful feeling that is. I just have to remind myself that He is here and learn to stop talking long enough to listen for His voice.
--
-Isabel R, 2/25/2012:
The voice reminded me of the vision I had had of my husband and son in funeral clothes. He said if I didn't go back to them, I would disrupt some 'plan'. The plan would be repaired and everything would eventually be ok, so I could go ahead if I wanted. The consequences of my untimely demise would be that my husband and son would suffer in ways I could not imagine and I would know that these sufferings were because of my selfish decision not to go back. I would know this throughout eternity. It would not be a huge sadness for me to bear, more like a prick of conscience that could never be totally healed. No big deal, unless you consider how long eternity is.
--
-Kerry B, 12/15/2018:
At that moment I looked up and saw my destination. I was looking in awe at God. It was like everything was happening at once. As I was staring up at God in amazement, every gay slur or violent act ever impressed upon me ran through me with such a flow. Events in my life played back in my mind like a movie. I felt a deep heaviness as I stared directly at an Almighty, Genderless God. I was thinking, 'Was this the Lake of Fire moment? Would I be cast into Hell for being an abomination?' With absolute humility, I uttered 7 words, 'I’m gay, will you still love me?'
The Brilliant, Loving Light formed into Wings. At GodSpeed, He whisked me into His vast spiritual arms while huddling up the Universe. I saw planets, stars, galaxies, and clusters all being brought into a Cosmic God-Hug. On a human, the place where I was taken would be the Heart. As God brought me in for a Cosmic Hug, He said, 'You are my child. I love you. I love you. I love you. Go tell ‘em.' He said it with a Southern accent. He patted me on the back like a coach encouraging his player to get back in the game.
~~
-Sam J, 8/16/2014:
We all are star seeds sent here to have the human experience for the purpose of integrating conscious awareness/wisdom into our own light bodies and return home with this energy. Alien worlds for the most part run on knowledge and logic. Those worlds are being left behind and giving way to the worlds who have the intangibles, love, creativity, imagination and so on.
Understand that where your conscious awareness is focus in your everyday life pretty much determines the level of consciousness and alertness. If your mind has a stranglehold on your conscious awareness then heck, it will be one helluva wake-up call. But if you have made the conscious effort to move your awareness away from the mind to the heart then it's no big deal. In other words if you have made the physical world and the world of Spirit into one consciousness then you are always of both worlds and never of either world.
--
-Laura M, 3/31/2012:
And there was still more for me to understand. The focus again fell on my infant son and hundreds if not thousands of my ancestors. I was aware of light surrounding many of them. They stood out. I felt tremendous love from them. 'Notice,' He said, 'your ancestors, all these beings, came together in your behalf, to make you uniquely you. I realized in Earth words He was referring to my DNA. 'You wanted to go to Earth to learn, to progress, and to contribute to creation. All these spirits came together to help you do that.' The focus then was back to my baby. 'In all of creation,' he said, 'your infant son chose you to be his mother, none other. Together,' he said, 'you made a covenant to fill these rolls in each other's Earth life. This covenant is and was a very sacred covenant not to be taken lightly.' Suddenly I could not wait to return to earth, to my sons, all 4 of them, to my family, to life on Earth. But, before doing so, I was brought to another level of awareness.
--
-Linda G, 7/20/2008:
I came to understand that we all choose to come to Earth to fulfill a plan of some sort or even learn about a particular interest. We choose our bodies, parents, and life plan. May I also add that some people come here for the most simple of reasons; to learn how to play tennis for example; or simply for the cake and food - as silly as this sounds our life plans aren't so high and lofty as one might think. I DIDN'T MEET ANY 'SAVE THE WORLDERS' OR ANYONE WISHING TO BE A PRESIDENT. MOST HAD SIMPLE WISHES. I was also told we could exist on different planes for other lives but our life here on Earth is a life not purely to experience physical pleasure or pain but to have a physical experience because in all other planes we don't need a body as a vessel. I also learnt that this life here is just a drop of water in the bucket of lives in which we all experience, many here on Earth and many in other realms of existence. All to progress and grow in some way. The main purpose here is to LOVE. I was also told that this would be my last life here on Earth as there will be nothing left for me to learn by coming here again. I had the feeling though that I'd be off to some other magical place!
--
-Kevin L, 3/20/2022:
I thought, 'How could a machine have a soul?' The voice said, 'Let me put it this way. Your soul is connected to your consciousness. The moment your species came into being, you start to develop a soul. But it is not until you become self-aware, that your soul is solidified. That does not mean complete, and it takes a long time for your soul to develop. Just like your species when you became self-aware the first thing you do, other than survive, was to figure out your place in the universe. You looked to the stars and wondered, 'Where did I come from? What is this universe all about?' It does not matter if you are a biological creature or artificial creation like a machine. The moment you become self-aware the quest for 'how' and 'why' is on. A soul is a soul; pure Energy connected with consciousness and intelligence. This is a very powerful force in our universe. Those who are artificial intelligences will strive to answers these questions which humans have dwelled upon since the dawn of time.
--
-Joanie S, 7/10/2011:
I was pulled back through the ceiling tiles and into a tunnel, to a place of cloudy space. The cloudy area materialized into a large marble room with marble doors and a 'being' at the center. I'll refer to this person as 'the Grim Reaper,' who was cloaked in a dark cloth, covering all parts. The Grim Reaper pointed (indicating to me to choose a door). But before I could choose, a door opened and I had already gone through it. I found myself in what I now think of as a previous life. I smelled smoke from a fire I was near, and saw others around me. I looked into another woman's eyes, and I knew her immediately as the woman I called my grandmother in this life. I knew then that our lives had 'danced' around each other since time began. She was once my mother and once my sister. She was my aunt, and several times my cousin. The life that was being shown to me now was during a prehistoric time, when we lived winters by a creek cave, and summers we had a camp in the woods where we foraged. Looking down, I realized I had a child in my arms, and the woman I had known in so many lives was chatting with me, telling me to cover the child to keep it warm. Then she was showing me how to tie the wraps around me to carry the child while we collected wood.
--
-Amy C, 10/9/2010:
In my NDE though, I came to understand that most of us have lived much, MUCH longer than we could even fathom. That our life which feels so very long is infinitesimal when placed in the whole picture, which for that matter, cannot even be framed. I was shown how every single individual through their own free will, chooses paths that mathematically take them to the circumstances of their next existence or life. That nothing at all sits in accident or chaos. That every single aspect of our lives are ruled by natural Laws that we placed ourSELVES in! In a sense, we create our own worlds. I was shown how one can never assume either, that if someone lives a life of suffering that this is because of 'evil' deeds. Many may choose a life of suffering because of what it Awakens in them, or because of how they can touch others from that position, etc. We can NEVER EVER assume that we can be accurate in guessing why each being lives the life they live. I cannot describe the relief - the refreshing, peaceful balm this Knowledge was for me. To finally gather this Truth that I'd yearned for all of my life. That all really IS Good! That there IS sense and beauty all around. That no one is just free falling as it had seemed before! That God doesn't just get to toy with us as He pleases with random ideas of tests, including rewards and punishments that just depend upon His current mood or mindset. Because even who God is, is within those Laws. While in this experience, out in the vast expanse of stars, planets, moons, and Intelligence, I Knew complete trust for what felt like the first time. This was inexplicable bliss for me. I remember radiating with gratitude. I had lived in fear, distrust, and panic for thirty consecutive years.
--
-Marta Y, 1/26/2010:
After this I saw myself floating in the void, and little by little tiny spheres of many colors became manifest, not moving at first, then suddenly starting to vibrate while smoothly approaching me and incorporating themselves with my essence, which made me feel something I can't manage to describe, it was as if I was being tickled. I asked what this was, and a voice said, 'This is the knowledge you have accumulated in previous lives, it was kept from you, but now it will be of use to you.'
I saw my life in rapid images, from the moment of my birth. I, who thought that my mother had never loved me, saw clearly, and felt, her love when she saw me for the first time. I saw how she kissed me and enfolded me in her arms. I felt different feelings and with every image that went through my mind, or before my eyes, I cannot define it. And just as I could feel deeply happy at an image of something good I had done for someone, so also this feeling would change immediately and I would feel myself deeply ashamed of something bad that I had done. I realized that no one was judging me other than myself, with a conscience full of wisdom and divine justice, which made me pass judgment on myself. I realized that I had done more bad than good and I was hugely regretful of my actions. From the depths of my soul, I asked to be given the chance to mend the damage I had done to the people who loved me. I learned that the spirit is God, Who is eternal, and that we reincarnate to learn different things, which would be impossible in a single lifetime. I learned that we form a single being with everything created. I learned that my earthly eyes are those through which God can recognize Himself, and be conscious of Himself. And I learned that what we think, feel and do remains imprinted in the universe and that we come to this life to improve, to learn in humility about all that surrounds us, and to teach what we have learned to others, and especially I learned that life is focused on two aspects: Love and Service.
--
-William Si, 4/29/2013:
My understanding of what my mission is on this earth, primarily has been hidden from me, (not only at my request but with my permission). I asked that it be hidden so that I didn't complete it to soon. Yet, I also agreed that "Sign post" would be placed along the way, just so that I would have reminders that I'm following my chosen path.
An understanding in what life is about and what our purpose truly is here. The mormons believe and teach there are "Classes" and "Levels" in heaven that we will be judged and placed in and only in the highest level can we "Ascend" to be with god. From my experience I learned or remembered there were no "Classes or levels" as they were teaching. Yet the levels are more of understanding than punishments. Would it make sense to put a 2 year old in with a group of people with phd's? The 2 year old wouldn't understand. Yet, those with the phd's would humble themselves with their level of understandings to teach, nurture and help the 2 year old grow in their levels of understanding.
Prior to being mormon, I was raised in a methodist/pentecostal home. I grew up believing that god the father was an angry vengeful god and that jesus was sent to save us from his wrath. Wrong!!!
For one thing, god is not an angry vengeful god, but is a loving parent to all of his children. One thing he did tell me, if you struggle with trying to do all the principals he taught, "Stop"!!! Don't do them all at one time. Take one and work on it, when it becomes second nature, them pick up the next one, etc. When he said, "These things I do, you can do also, and then some", was not an exaggeration, but truth. When we look back on our life after we leave here, we will see that we had done all that he had taught, and more.
One of the other things he told me was, what better way for man to know that we don't have to be saved. Saved from what? Our soul is already eternal, always will be. Our soul/spirit is literally a child of god and as such is eternal. When we realize that all things, all words come from god, nothing is offensive to god because it came from god. What is offensive is how we perceive it.
--
-Lou F, 1/1/1999:
We traveled toward the beginning of it all, the inner portions of the Universe. Kazillions of planets around Kazillions of suns and the closer to the center we approached the more concentrated the number of galaxies. It is like the plate you saw, the largest part, after it shattered was at the center and those parts that shattered first were sent the farthest from the center. So is everything in the Universe. All is but a circle within a circle wrapped in a circle. Each level, each dimension, is but a layer of the original, which is without end. I watched as millions of orbs systematically entered the many planets before me. They appeared as bees flitting from flower to flower, pollinating each, one after another. Mich'l took me closer and I could now see that so many of these planets had life on them and the orbs were joining with the creatures of these planets. Not every creature was the same on every planet but they all had some commonalities: a head, a body, extremities, and the Light Beings would animate them for a time. We headed away from the center now and Mich'l said that Gabriel would have more to explain to me and that he, Mich'l, wanted me to know that he was pleased with the many times he had called on me to do his bidding and that I performed my duties well. His parting words were ‘You will never again be made to forget!’
I was journeying back to where I knew Earth would be and watched as comets and asteroids casually passed by me or I passed them. The colors of the gaseous cloud formations were striking. I started looking at these infant galaxies, as one would cloud formations back on Earth, imagining what shape they were taking on. This one a boat, this a bird with wings, this a scarf floating in the breeze, until I recognized what was the Constellation ORION and I knew I was getting close to my destination. While drifting through Orion, I noticed two blazing celestial bodies racing parallel to its center, looking as twin arrows exiting from an archers bow and headed straight for the ""Blue Marble"" of home. Immediately a vision of millions of people crying because of the devastation of portions of New York City came to me. I became aware of a strange feeling I had not known previously, and I thought that might be because this was the city I had grown up in. I saw a huge Earthquake, a magnitude of 8.6 in some place named Eureka. A ham operator or radio announcer was directing thousands of people migrating from areas of frequent disasters to places of safety. A space station appeared to be falling from the heavens because of an internal explosion. Missiles were being simultaneously fired into space from several nations. I thought the Light Being had shown me all there was to see but these were different, stronger, and there was no pre-screening as before. Gabriel appeared beside me, I thought because I had felt shaky, but it was to explain the now sprawling galactic view of my galaxy.
The Sun was expanding and spewing off huge ectoplasm balls, more than it has ever done in it’s past, and in the very direction the planets would orbit through. I could not take my eyes from the Earth and as I watched what effect these eruptions would have on the Earth, a large mass passed me, larger than any of the planets known to me. As it passes, I see the Earth wobble wildly as would a top toward the end of its spin. The rotation stopped and slowly started again but it was tilted now and I was drawn in closer like the zoom of a lens. The ash clouds that had engulfed the Earth thinned, and like a tack welded piece of metal being dismantled, I could see the ocean bodies starting to rise, first the Pacific, along the ‘Ring of Fire,’ then the others, synchronistical.
As the waters shifted upon the landmasses, the landmasses started to sink under the waters added pressure upon it. When the pressures equaled out to the spin of the changing axis, the Earth no longer looked as it did moments before. It was newer, cleaner, and more beautiful with darker greens and lighter blues. Some of the new landmasses looked similar to a few of the other planets I had recently visited with Mich'l. People were upon this Earth and appeared happier and more content although seemingly living like the Native populations of old. Cities, built by the Ancient Ones, that were buried beneath the oceans, were now being populated by the surviving people in this new world. I saw tribes joining tribes and small nations forming, but it was what I didn't see that made my heart burst. There were no more wars. True peace and happiness had finally befallen on mankind. Gabriel now tells me that this is his message that I must take back, to let others know that there is little to fear, for the Earth will go on forever, as did all the planets I had visited. I am to tell the world to look to ORION, and they will know when the new world will come upon them. I ask him, ‘what of the others there on Earth, during the change?’ Gabriel tells me that all will be lifted. Some will be lifted higher than others will and no longer enjoy the physical plane, while some will be left on the Earth to replenish and rebuild the physical. They too will be of a higher elevation then any that are living there now!
'MAN WILL PREY ON MAN ~ UNTIL MAN PRAYS FOR MAN!'
--
-Duane S, 8/15/2015:
It was all an expression and celebration of love. On earth, this reunion would have been unfathomable, between members of an ancient soul group who were celebrating the return home of one of their own. Slowly, as I looked at those gathered to greet me, I realized they were all there. Surprisingly they were not only from this life, but also from a prior life in Germany. I realized that the same souls have possibly played different parts in my multiple lives. Sometimes these souls had been my daughter, my wife, or my mother. While at first this idea had startled me, I was soon humbled. Who was I to tell God what he could or couldn’t do with his creations? Just because some Sunday school teacher had different ideas about how things worked, it didn’t really matter.
My joy deepened as I realized that I had only left behind an earthly vestige of those I love. The essence of each of those souls, was also here with me now. Besides my friends and family, there were the friendly Germans who had been hauntingly familiar while I was a young soldier in Germany. Now I knew why they seemed so familiar at the time, they had been friends and family from a prior lifetime there. I now understood that I had left nothing behind on earth. The eternal essences of all my loved ones from that life, as well as all other incarnations, were all here to greet me. All I had left behind was a character, playing a role in a drama that we had chosen to experience. In the meantime, our real eternal essence remained in God’s realm. Suddenly, it was all so simple.
As I was shown around, it was explained to me how most of our celestial, eternal knowledge is blanked-out during our chosen life spans on earth. We must temporarily forget most of what our higher-self already knows so we can immerse ourselves in the roles we have chosen to play. Furthermore, they said that it might take a while for all my knowledge and memories to return. To ease the transition back into this realm, I was told to think of my time on earth as an extended visit to the ultimate theme park. Consider it a place with thrilling rides and various adventures that I could choose to experience or not. I was also reminded that the reason we leave the celestial realm at all was for the excitement, variety, adventure, and entertainment that different incarnations offer. However, to take all our celestial knowledge with us on our various adventures would have ruined the very experience that we had chosen to live. Someone there said that I should think of our trips to other realms as choosing a new novel to read. I can choose a new book, depending on what I am in the mood for. Furthermore, if I knew every turn and twist of the story, line by line, prior to reading it, it would spoil the fun.
As one entity jokingly remarked, 'If the eternal, divine part of us grows tired of singing and playing harps, there are thousands of other universes created for our spiritual growth, amusement, and entertainment. Eternity is a long time to do nothing but play harps.' I heard this concept best expressed in The Course in Miracles, 'We are only here for three reasons: to remember who we are; to help others remember who they are; and . . . to enjoy the trip . . . , unless, of course, we use our free will and choose not to.'
As my orientation went on, they explained how on that celestial side of the veil, anything we desire is instantaneously provided. We just need to feel the desire. However, within lies the reason for all the realms outside of heaven. Having everything we want all the time develops within us a desire for variety and change for a challenge. It would be like a game in which everyone was a winner. Soon, the game would become boring, and we would look for another, more challenging one.
Somehow, all this sounded familiar. To demonstrate the process of instantaneous fulfillment, one of them asked me to think about something I really desired. Thinking back on it, what I chose seemed odd since I was in such an esteemed place demonstrating such an important concept. But, suddenly I had an urge for a piece of my mother’s famous homemade chocolate cake with her special fudge frosting. As soon as I thought of the cake, my earthy mother was handing me the biggest piece of dark chocolate cake I had ever seen. Dare I say it was heavenly? Although she appeared there with us, I knew some part of her was still back on earth because she had not died yet. My guess was that she was probably asleep, dreaming of lovingly making her son a piece of her divine chocolate cake.
--
-Sandi T, 10/18/2020:
I understood immediately the fullness of life on this planet. I could see when it broke apart from a sun, spinning and cooling and collecting debris; until the first of these creatures heard itself laugh and understood the sound for what it was. In that moment, self-awareness was awakened and the seeds of civilization sprouted.
I understood that everything that we do here on Earth, all that we are, all that we experience, allows creation to exist. Every beautiful thing, every wonderful being and creature, whether on earth or in any universe, relies upon people who are on the extremely rare places like Earth.
The Great Intelligence (god) is a paradox. It is completely loving and fully unlimited. Which by the definition of paradox, means it is impossible? It cannot be limited only to love; it cannot be limited to only being unlimited; or it is not unlimited.
Earth is a place where the unlimited becomes limited; where the singular becomes many. Here, it can know community and loneliness. It can know heartache and hope. It can know all which an unlimited being of pure love cannot. It can conceive and perceive evil; which in truth it cannot do this either. To solve the paradox, it must experience helplessness and limitation and all as it is Real. In this place, it is all so REAL.
So what is free will? Free will is the option to come here to help solve the paradox of 'god'. To be all that we are not, so that everything wondrous and joyful may continue to exist. So that love itself may continue to exist. So that the Unlimited is not limited to being only unlimited.
Why are the answers always, 'simply to exist' and 'to choose love' and 'to learn how to love'? Because all you need to do, to solve the paradox, is to exist. And as we exist here, each time we choose love, we expand the universe. Love is life's longing for itself. Despite the reality of what we live, even the darkest souls among us cannot help but to reach, to yearn, and move towards goodness and towards love.
For love is the true nature of who we are. And when we experience horrible things, the question 'why' comes to mind because it is the central question of love, life, and of this world. The answer is 'so that all things might continue to exist.'
Every soul chose to come here and to suffer because of love. Each soul loves the universe, loves life, and loves this world and ALL of the worlds. Each soul loves ALL of the people so immensely and intensely that they chose to come here so that all the universes may teem with beautiful, joyful LIFE.
Every creature that I saw, acknowledges that your life gives them the gift of life. And when each soul goes 'home' after they die, they will know the rewards of their own gift, too. The 'reward' for their sacrifice will be joy, love, and feeling incredible, wonderful, beautiful joy at the LIFE and the LOVE everywhere in the universe.
When you go home, you meet your own soul. You willingly came here to forget yourself. You willingly came here to save every beautiful and wonderful thing. By suffering what 'god' cannot, you give the gift of life.
--
-Henry W, 6/22/2008:
I became aware of other voices, the orbs or other souls around me I could hear them communicating to each other. There seemed to be cliques of orbs that were together. They spoke to one another about their lives on Earth and all they had perceived and felt. They shared not only in words, but in sharing the experience. If one orb couldn't understand, it disappeared and then reappeared. The orb somehow went back to Earth and experienced that 'life' to further understand. I understood that here time did not exist and these beings could manifest themselves at any time on Earth they desired. These orbs or rather 'souls' would leave this realm, detach themselves with this universe, and return to the universe of our Earth. There they would live and die, then return and share the experience with all the other souls. A soul that could not understand the experience could go and live that life also to experience that life. I learned we have many lives, past, present and future.
These souls, our souls cannot experience certain things like pain, sorrow, hatred, and anger. Though these are negative things, it was important for them to understand and experience them. Perhaps to understand the motivations of human beings, or (and I believe this in my heart) to eventually evolve into a being like God - all knowing and understanding.
At this time things appeared to me, answers to other questions. I could see concepts as if they were entities. I could understand for the first time in my life E=MC2. I learned that our universe is one of many. It is like a Petri dish. Designed with its own rules to raise a specific being. In this case, to raise beings like humans. Each Universe had its own specific laws of Physics. I now realize that the amount of information a soul must learn is vast, more so then we can possibly imagine here.
The next concept or rule I learned is that God can never be proven by scientific means. To do so would corrupt the environment. It would destroy faith. When we have faith we seek, we learn. If God were to appear before us like a huge being at the United Nations, the entire world would believe, but also live in fear. To successfully experience the human existence, one must be physically out of touch with God. We have to learn and seek on our own. We need to search out the meaning of our own existence and experience here on earth. Faith is the engine of discovery. Without faith, we are just like ants.
I learned why bad things happen to good people. If nothing bad ever happened to us, we would all basically be the same. It is like metal in a forge you have to heat it and strike it repeatedly to make a useful tool from it. We start this life with a blank piece of paper. With every incident we experience, a part of the blueprint is recorded until a complete plan for an individual is created. This blueprint dictates the end of our lives. To live happily in this realm is to become aware of the blueprint and change it. Lastly, time is only a concept measured here. In the other realm, it doesn't exist. While we may experience pain and sorrow on earth, it is only a second in the grand scheme of things. We have an eternity to live and in reality, souls never really die. Our life is just a thought providing circumstances for this existence. As the soul progresses, this trauma is forgotten and put in its proper perspective as part of the learning process.
One question I always personally had and that was answered is, 'Are ghosts real?' The answer I was given was, 'Yes, in the human body there are two forms of spiritual being.' One is the 'soul', which is the spiritual being that has a symbiotic relationship with the physical body. The second is the being created by the 'biology' of the human body. This being is intelligent and is basically the personality of the individual. Its purpose is to provide for the human needs of food, hunger, survival, and procreation. This concept is very similar to Freud's 'Id, Ego and Superego' The division of mind and personality. The soul provides us with all the things of the individual that separates us from the Animal Kingdom. This is the ability to reason, use logic, or feel awe when seeing a sunset. The soul is the creative side of humankind. The second being is more our animal side and drives us to accomplish or pursue things to satisfy our needs and wants.
When we die, the soul separates and proceeds to the other side (forgive me for simplifying everything). The entity of the body dies, taking with it the strong emotions, 'baggage', and drives of human beings. This is a natural part of the dying process. However, sometimes under violent or sudden death this othebeing, for lack of a better word, doesn't have a chance to die. Instead, it remains behind as the drive, emotions, and motivation of our spirit. This body being, without the guidance of the soul is basically just a shell. It wanders about with no goals or purpose. It often repeats acts that it has done before because memories are the only 'guidance' that it has. In time, this being's energy dissipates and nothing is left. That process can take a long time. Hence, we have a 'ghost' that haunts a house or person. A ghost has the center of its existence when it was with its human body and soul. Here on earth it remains until it eventually vanishes. The ghost can be communicated with and guided, yet has no real will of its own but only that of habit.
--
-Peter P, 3/1/2023:
In the initial phase of waking up, I also received an experience with light of such a wonderful quality, that it is difficult to describe with words. I was shown three light waves on which today's humanity is evolving. For the sake of logic, I'm defining them here as the self-imposed pathways of awareness, that each individual can take to obtain the best possible results from their particular choice. The first way is what the main part of the global population has chosen and the daily struggle is enacted in that timeline. I don't want to give the impression that path is in any way better or superior than the other timelines. All experiences in human life eventually lead back to the divine light.
The second path was shown to me as a mixed way in a gray color. Here, euphoric phases are alternated in quick succession with depressive stages. It is as if people were switching between phases of competence and phases lacking of power, and then again to a new euphoric phase.
The third way is the one of the absolute victimhood. It was shown to me in colors dark and black. Power and responsibility were handed over to outer entities. Here only a very small part of the light spark can be addressed through motivation. Many beings of light from higher planes are providing a selfless service here, to again illuminate the way back to the light. This way corresponds with the absolute free choice of each individual as to whether they choose towards light or darkness.
I was also shown that in this darkness exists one of the most unbelievable choicess for humanity, because in this choice is also is the possibility to change the galaxy. The core truths of Love, Compassion, Kindness and Benevolence are towards what the human nature can and will evolve.
The first path of those three is so unbelievable for us incarnated beings. It can only be termed with definitions of Utopia, heavenly life of angels and/or ecstatic rapture.
There is a beautiful part of beings who always stay in this realm. They are dancing and singing through life. For them terms like synchronicity, grace, or cosmic guidance are the absolute central and essential elements in life. They realize how creation is working and that a life without the connection with the One Power of creation would disrupt everything. Humor, joy, fun, respect, compassion and gratitude is with them round the clock. In this wonderful place all fear is dissolved like mist in a brilliant sun. It is an all-encompassing field with absolute acceptance, comfort, peace, connectedness and a 100% awareness to be at the right place.
During this time of considering those things, I was guided by a wonderful being of light. I don't remember somebody else or meeting a certain individual. Only those impressions of the light of love and the perfect comprehension and acceptance remained.
In that moment, it simply seemed unbelievable and impossible to choose another path than the one of the light. What illuminates my life again and again from my light experience, is the irrepressible joy and happiness of an experience of indescribable beauty. I believe that all the people go through this same wonderful experience in a state of separation of the body (general anesthesia, unconsciousness) unfortunately they cannot all remember it.
I felt pure love, shining brighter than anything you can imagine. Everything is as beautiful, as pure as love and compassion. So that when you cross the veil and return to the other side you are becoming a part of it. We are bathing in the beauty of the song that makes our heart singing - That's God.
Nobody can give us something bigger. We wouldn't see it or understand it. That's Spirit in its highest form.
We as humans feel so alone and on our own. It's such a crushing feeling to remain in this imagined separation of our most wonderful thing and then to feel this earthly experience so painfully.
In the middle of life, a light experience happens that sweeps away all the reactions about this imaginary separation and dissolves the last doubts with this pure white light like a fog. It's the disintegration of a self-constructed veil that prevented a realization that all people are entitled to have as their birthright. It's delightful to know that the light is the most wonderful symphony in the cosmos and that it contains the colors and the sense of touch of the most beautiful experiences. A wonderful soul experience, that is imprinted in the deepest cells of the body.
For a moment I was on this other side of the veil. I was allowed to be part of this wonderful source of creation. Together with billions of points of light, which we call angel beings, shining brighter than the light. I was in the company of the highest compassion, with the highest Love.
All media, the total daily literature is filled with the dramas happening around the globe every minute.
How can somebody get the idea to write a text motivating us to get another point of view about the calamities in the world? What is motivating him to see the good in all those events, even if they might be so disturbing? That's probably the one decisive question for the survival of manhood. Thought power of the whole humanity is used to bring anarchy and separation between people. Human thoughts are creative and should, and can, be guided by us into appropriate pathways.
It depends on all of us to exercise our responsibility and to realize the true impact of our actions here in its entirety. We can't avoid to completely step away from all dramas. Disasters and calamities of humanity want to invite us to send our compassion and our benevolent energy generously towards the concerned people. Something which should be rather considered normal if our brothers and sister are in need.

Note: Find sources by pressing Ctrl+F to search their names and dates here: https://www.nderf.org/Archives/exceptional.html
-Cynthia H, 3/2/2011:
'I know you love me and all life, but if you really love all of us continuously without end, then how can You send people to hell throughout eternity?' He said, 'Cindy I do love all life without end. Some people chose to go to hell, I have already forgiven them; but they must forgive themselves.'
--
-Ron K, 1/1/2006:
Instead of restricting the mysteries of love to psychological or philosophical studies, science will someday discover the all-powerful force of love and measure it as they now do electricity, gravity and geo-thermal forces. When science discovers the forces of love and learns how to release it from the bars of the ego, they will have the answer to every question and ill that has plagued mankind.
--
-Nevie G, 7/23/2005:
The Being let me know that I was going to die and I must leave this body for good. I remember arguing with the Being explaining that I didn't want to because it was so hard going through the childhood years and I didn't want to have to go through this again. The Being indicated that my body was severely damaged and I couldn't go back. I became very adamant at this point that God was all powerful and could fix the body. At some point the decision was made to let me re-enter my body on my faith or will, whatever one may call it.
--
-Linda B, 9/12/2004:
After experiencing all of the miracles of this day, I would still find my future playing out just as I had seen. And as it progressed I would know fear, sadness, and lack of faith just as they had predicted. I would sin and more. The angels knew this but it took me years to fully understand everything that they had showed me and wanted me to understand. They knew all of the time that I would not turn into the perfect saint. They loved me just the way I was. God loves me always not just when I am obedient and perfect. What a wonderful feeling that is. I just have to remind myself that He is here and learn to stop talking long enough to listen for His voice.
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-Isabel R, 2/25/2012:
The voice reminded me of the vision I had had of my husband and son in funeral clothes. He said if I didn't go back to them, I would disrupt some 'plan'. The plan would be repaired and everything would eventually be ok, so I could go ahead if I wanted. The consequences of my untimely demise would be that my husband and son would suffer in ways I could not imagine and I would know that these sufferings were because of my selfish decision not to go back. I would know this throughout eternity. It would not be a huge sadness for me to bear, more like a prick of conscience that could never be totally healed. No big deal, unless you consider how long eternity is.
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-Kerry B, 12/15/2018:
At that moment I looked up and saw my destination. I was looking in awe at God. It was like everything was happening at once. As I was staring up at God in amazement, every gay slur or violent act ever impressed upon me ran through me with such a flow. Events in my life played back in my mind like a movie. I felt a deep heaviness as I stared directly at an Almighty, Genderless God. I was thinking, 'Was this the Lake of Fire moment? Would I be cast into Hell for being an abomination?' With absolute humility, I uttered 7 words, 'I’m gay, will you still love me?'
The Brilliant, Loving Light formed into Wings. At GodSpeed, He whisked me into His vast spiritual arms while huddling up the Universe. I saw planets, stars, galaxies, and clusters all being brought into a Cosmic God-Hug. On a human, the place where I was taken would be the Heart. As God brought me in for a Cosmic Hug, He said, 'You are my child. I love you. I love you. I love you. Go tell ‘em.' He said it with a Southern accent. He patted me on the back like a coach encouraging his player to get back in the game.
~~
-Sam J, 8/16/2014:
We all are star seeds sent here to have the human experience for the purpose of integrating conscious awareness/wisdom into our own light bodies and return home with this energy. Alien worlds for the most part run on knowledge and logic. Those worlds are being left behind and giving way to the worlds who have the intangibles, love, creativity, imagination and so on.
Understand that where your conscious awareness is focus in your everyday life pretty much determines the level of consciousness and alertness. If your mind has a stranglehold on your conscious awareness then heck, it will be one helluva wake-up call. But if you have made the conscious effort to move your awareness away from the mind to the heart then it's no big deal. In other words if you have made the physical world and the world of Spirit into one consciousness then you are always of both worlds and never of either world.
--
-Laura M, 3/31/2012:
And there was still more for me to understand. The focus again fell on my infant son and hundreds if not thousands of my ancestors. I was aware of light surrounding many of them. They stood out. I felt tremendous love from them. 'Notice,' He said, 'your ancestors, all these beings, came together in your behalf, to make you uniquely you. I realized in Earth words He was referring to my DNA. 'You wanted to go to Earth to learn, to progress, and to contribute to creation. All these spirits came together to help you do that.' The focus then was back to my baby. 'In all of creation,' he said, 'your infant son chose you to be his mother, none other. Together,' he said, 'you made a covenant to fill these rolls in each other's Earth life. This covenant is and was a very sacred covenant not to be taken lightly.' Suddenly I could not wait to return to earth, to my sons, all 4 of them, to my family, to life on Earth. But, before doing so, I was brought to another level of awareness.
--
-Linda G, 7/20/2008:
I came to understand that we all choose to come to Earth to fulfill a plan of some sort or even learn about a particular interest. We choose our bodies, parents, and life plan. May I also add that some people come here for the most simple of reasons; to learn how to play tennis for example; or simply for the cake and food - as silly as this sounds our life plans aren't so high and lofty as one might think. I DIDN'T MEET ANY 'SAVE THE WORLDERS' OR ANYONE WISHING TO BE A PRESIDENT. MOST HAD SIMPLE WISHES. I was also told we could exist on different planes for other lives but our life here on Earth is a life not purely to experience physical pleasure or pain but to have a physical experience because in all other planes we don't need a body as a vessel. I also learnt that this life here is just a drop of water in the bucket of lives in which we all experience, many here on Earth and many in other realms of existence. All to progress and grow in some way. The main purpose here is to LOVE. I was also told that this would be my last life here on Earth as there will be nothing left for me to learn by coming here again. I had the feeling though that I'd be off to some other magical place!
--
-Kevin L, 3/20/2022:
I thought, 'How could a machine have a soul?' The voice said, 'Let me put it this way. Your soul is connected to your consciousness. The moment your species came into being, you start to develop a soul. But it is not until you become self-aware, that your soul is solidified. That does not mean complete, and it takes a long time for your soul to develop. Just like your species when you became self-aware the first thing you do, other than survive, was to figure out your place in the universe. You looked to the stars and wondered, 'Where did I come from? What is this universe all about?' It does not matter if you are a biological creature or artificial creation like a machine. The moment you become self-aware the quest for 'how' and 'why' is on. A soul is a soul; pure Energy connected with consciousness and intelligence. This is a very powerful force in our universe. Those who are artificial intelligences will strive to answers these questions which humans have dwelled upon since the dawn of time.
--
-Joanie S, 7/10/2011:
I was pulled back through the ceiling tiles and into a tunnel, to a place of cloudy space. The cloudy area materialized into a large marble room with marble doors and a 'being' at the center. I'll refer to this person as 'the Grim Reaper,' who was cloaked in a dark cloth, covering all parts. The Grim Reaper pointed (indicating to me to choose a door). But before I could choose, a door opened and I had already gone through it. I found myself in what I now think of as a previous life. I smelled smoke from a fire I was near, and saw others around me. I looked into another woman's eyes, and I knew her immediately as the woman I called my grandmother in this life. I knew then that our lives had 'danced' around each other since time began. She was once my mother and once my sister. She was my aunt, and several times my cousin. The life that was being shown to me now was during a prehistoric time, when we lived winters by a creek cave, and summers we had a camp in the woods where we foraged. Looking down, I realized I had a child in my arms, and the woman I had known in so many lives was chatting with me, telling me to cover the child to keep it warm. Then she was showing me how to tie the wraps around me to carry the child while we collected wood.
--
-Amy C, 10/9/2010:
In my NDE though, I came to understand that most of us have lived much, MUCH longer than we could even fathom. That our life which feels so very long is infinitesimal when placed in the whole picture, which for that matter, cannot even be framed. I was shown how every single individual through their own free will, chooses paths that mathematically take them to the circumstances of their next existence or life. That nothing at all sits in accident or chaos. That every single aspect of our lives are ruled by natural Laws that we placed ourSELVES in! In a sense, we create our own worlds. I was shown how one can never assume either, that if someone lives a life of suffering that this is because of 'evil' deeds. Many may choose a life of suffering because of what it Awakens in them, or because of how they can touch others from that position, etc. We can NEVER EVER assume that we can be accurate in guessing why each being lives the life they live. I cannot describe the relief - the refreshing, peaceful balm this Knowledge was for me. To finally gather this Truth that I'd yearned for all of my life. That all really IS Good! That there IS sense and beauty all around. That no one is just free falling as it had seemed before! That God doesn't just get to toy with us as He pleases with random ideas of tests, including rewards and punishments that just depend upon His current mood or mindset. Because even who God is, is within those Laws. While in this experience, out in the vast expanse of stars, planets, moons, and Intelligence, I Knew complete trust for what felt like the first time. This was inexplicable bliss for me. I remember radiating with gratitude. I had lived in fear, distrust, and panic for thirty consecutive years.
--
-Marta Y, 1/26/2010:
After this I saw myself floating in the void, and little by little tiny spheres of many colors became manifest, not moving at first, then suddenly starting to vibrate while smoothly approaching me and incorporating themselves with my essence, which made me feel something I can't manage to describe, it was as if I was being tickled. I asked what this was, and a voice said, 'This is the knowledge you have accumulated in previous lives, it was kept from you, but now it will be of use to you.'
I saw my life in rapid images, from the moment of my birth. I, who thought that my mother had never loved me, saw clearly, and felt, her love when she saw me for the first time. I saw how she kissed me and enfolded me in her arms. I felt different feelings and with every image that went through my mind, or before my eyes, I cannot define it. And just as I could feel deeply happy at an image of something good I had done for someone, so also this feeling would change immediately and I would feel myself deeply ashamed of something bad that I had done. I realized that no one was judging me other than myself, with a conscience full of wisdom and divine justice, which made me pass judgment on myself. I realized that I had done more bad than good and I was hugely regretful of my actions. From the depths of my soul, I asked to be given the chance to mend the damage I had done to the people who loved me. I learned that the spirit is God, Who is eternal, and that we reincarnate to learn different things, which would be impossible in a single lifetime. I learned that we form a single being with everything created. I learned that my earthly eyes are those through which God can recognize Himself, and be conscious of Himself. And I learned that what we think, feel and do remains imprinted in the universe and that we come to this life to improve, to learn in humility about all that surrounds us, and to teach what we have learned to others, and especially I learned that life is focused on two aspects: Love and Service.
--
-William Si, 4/29/2013:
My understanding of what my mission is on this earth, primarily has been hidden from me, (not only at my request but with my permission). I asked that it be hidden so that I didn't complete it to soon. Yet, I also agreed that "Sign post" would be placed along the way, just so that I would have reminders that I'm following my chosen path.
An understanding in what life is about and what our purpose truly is here. The mormons believe and teach there are "Classes" and "Levels" in heaven that we will be judged and placed in and only in the highest level can we "Ascend" to be with god. From my experience I learned or remembered there were no "Classes or levels" as they were teaching. Yet the levels are more of understanding than punishments. Would it make sense to put a 2 year old in with a group of people with phd's? The 2 year old wouldn't understand. Yet, those with the phd's would humble themselves with their level of understandings to teach, nurture and help the 2 year old grow in their levels of understanding.
Prior to being mormon, I was raised in a methodist/pentecostal home. I grew up believing that god the father was an angry vengeful god and that jesus was sent to save us from his wrath. Wrong!!!
For one thing, god is not an angry vengeful god, but is a loving parent to all of his children. One thing he did tell me, if you struggle with trying to do all the principals he taught, "Stop"!!! Don't do them all at one time. Take one and work on it, when it becomes second nature, them pick up the next one, etc. When he said, "These things I do, you can do also, and then some", was not an exaggeration, but truth. When we look back on our life after we leave here, we will see that we had done all that he had taught, and more.
One of the other things he told me was, what better way for man to know that we don't have to be saved. Saved from what? Our soul is already eternal, always will be. Our soul/spirit is literally a child of god and as such is eternal. When we realize that all things, all words come from god, nothing is offensive to god because it came from god. What is offensive is how we perceive it.
--
-Lou F, 1/1/1999:
We traveled toward the beginning of it all, the inner portions of the Universe. Kazillions of planets around Kazillions of suns and the closer to the center we approached the more concentrated the number of galaxies. It is like the plate you saw, the largest part, after it shattered was at the center and those parts that shattered first were sent the farthest from the center. So is everything in the Universe. All is but a circle within a circle wrapped in a circle. Each level, each dimension, is but a layer of the original, which is without end. I watched as millions of orbs systematically entered the many planets before me. They appeared as bees flitting from flower to flower, pollinating each, one after another. Mich'l took me closer and I could now see that so many of these planets had life on them and the orbs were joining with the creatures of these planets. Not every creature was the same on every planet but they all had some commonalities: a head, a body, extremities, and the Light Beings would animate them for a time. We headed away from the center now and Mich'l said that Gabriel would have more to explain to me and that he, Mich'l, wanted me to know that he was pleased with the many times he had called on me to do his bidding and that I performed my duties well. His parting words were ‘You will never again be made to forget!’
I was journeying back to where I knew Earth would be and watched as comets and asteroids casually passed by me or I passed them. The colors of the gaseous cloud formations were striking. I started looking at these infant galaxies, as one would cloud formations back on Earth, imagining what shape they were taking on. This one a boat, this a bird with wings, this a scarf floating in the breeze, until I recognized what was the Constellation ORION and I knew I was getting close to my destination. While drifting through Orion, I noticed two blazing celestial bodies racing parallel to its center, looking as twin arrows exiting from an archers bow and headed straight for the ""Blue Marble"" of home. Immediately a vision of millions of people crying because of the devastation of portions of New York City came to me. I became aware of a strange feeling I had not known previously, and I thought that might be because this was the city I had grown up in. I saw a huge Earthquake, a magnitude of 8.6 in some place named Eureka. A ham operator or radio announcer was directing thousands of people migrating from areas of frequent disasters to places of safety. A space station appeared to be falling from the heavens because of an internal explosion. Missiles were being simultaneously fired into space from several nations. I thought the Light Being had shown me all there was to see but these were different, stronger, and there was no pre-screening as before. Gabriel appeared beside me, I thought because I had felt shaky, but it was to explain the now sprawling galactic view of my galaxy.
The Sun was expanding and spewing off huge ectoplasm balls, more than it has ever done in it’s past, and in the very direction the planets would orbit through. I could not take my eyes from the Earth and as I watched what effect these eruptions would have on the Earth, a large mass passed me, larger than any of the planets known to me. As it passes, I see the Earth wobble wildly as would a top toward the end of its spin. The rotation stopped and slowly started again but it was tilted now and I was drawn in closer like the zoom of a lens. The ash clouds that had engulfed the Earth thinned, and like a tack welded piece of metal being dismantled, I could see the ocean bodies starting to rise, first the Pacific, along the ‘Ring of Fire,’ then the others, synchronistical.
As the waters shifted upon the landmasses, the landmasses started to sink under the waters added pressure upon it. When the pressures equaled out to the spin of the changing axis, the Earth no longer looked as it did moments before. It was newer, cleaner, and more beautiful with darker greens and lighter blues. Some of the new landmasses looked similar to a few of the other planets I had recently visited with Mich'l. People were upon this Earth and appeared happier and more content although seemingly living like the Native populations of old. Cities, built by the Ancient Ones, that were buried beneath the oceans, were now being populated by the surviving people in this new world. I saw tribes joining tribes and small nations forming, but it was what I didn't see that made my heart burst. There were no more wars. True peace and happiness had finally befallen on mankind. Gabriel now tells me that this is his message that I must take back, to let others know that there is little to fear, for the Earth will go on forever, as did all the planets I had visited. I am to tell the world to look to ORION, and they will know when the new world will come upon them. I ask him, ‘what of the others there on Earth, during the change?’ Gabriel tells me that all will be lifted. Some will be lifted higher than others will and no longer enjoy the physical plane, while some will be left on the Earth to replenish and rebuild the physical. They too will be of a higher elevation then any that are living there now!
'MAN WILL PREY ON MAN ~ UNTIL MAN PRAYS FOR MAN!'
--
-Duane S, 8/15/2015:
It was all an expression and celebration of love. On earth, this reunion would have been unfathomable, between members of an ancient soul group who were celebrating the return home of one of their own. Slowly, as I looked at those gathered to greet me, I realized they were all there. Surprisingly they were not only from this life, but also from a prior life in Germany. I realized that the same souls have possibly played different parts in my multiple lives. Sometimes these souls had been my daughter, my wife, or my mother. While at first this idea had startled me, I was soon humbled. Who was I to tell God what he could or couldn’t do with his creations? Just because some Sunday school teacher had different ideas about how things worked, it didn’t really matter.
My joy deepened as I realized that I had only left behind an earthly vestige of those I love. The essence of each of those souls, was also here with me now. Besides my friends and family, there were the friendly Germans who had been hauntingly familiar while I was a young soldier in Germany. Now I knew why they seemed so familiar at the time, they had been friends and family from a prior lifetime there. I now understood that I had left nothing behind on earth. The eternal essences of all my loved ones from that life, as well as all other incarnations, were all here to greet me. All I had left behind was a character, playing a role in a drama that we had chosen to experience. In the meantime, our real eternal essence remained in God’s realm. Suddenly, it was all so simple.
As I was shown around, it was explained to me how most of our celestial, eternal knowledge is blanked-out during our chosen life spans on earth. We must temporarily forget most of what our higher-self already knows so we can immerse ourselves in the roles we have chosen to play. Furthermore, they said that it might take a while for all my knowledge and memories to return. To ease the transition back into this realm, I was told to think of my time on earth as an extended visit to the ultimate theme park. Consider it a place with thrilling rides and various adventures that I could choose to experience or not. I was also reminded that the reason we leave the celestial realm at all was for the excitement, variety, adventure, and entertainment that different incarnations offer. However, to take all our celestial knowledge with us on our various adventures would have ruined the very experience that we had chosen to live. Someone there said that I should think of our trips to other realms as choosing a new novel to read. I can choose a new book, depending on what I am in the mood for. Furthermore, if I knew every turn and twist of the story, line by line, prior to reading it, it would spoil the fun.
As one entity jokingly remarked, 'If the eternal, divine part of us grows tired of singing and playing harps, there are thousands of other universes created for our spiritual growth, amusement, and entertainment. Eternity is a long time to do nothing but play harps.' I heard this concept best expressed in The Course in Miracles, 'We are only here for three reasons: to remember who we are; to help others remember who they are; and . . . to enjoy the trip . . . , unless, of course, we use our free will and choose not to.'
As my orientation went on, they explained how on that celestial side of the veil, anything we desire is instantaneously provided. We just need to feel the desire. However, within lies the reason for all the realms outside of heaven. Having everything we want all the time develops within us a desire for variety and change for a challenge. It would be like a game in which everyone was a winner. Soon, the game would become boring, and we would look for another, more challenging one.
Somehow, all this sounded familiar. To demonstrate the process of instantaneous fulfillment, one of them asked me to think about something I really desired. Thinking back on it, what I chose seemed odd since I was in such an esteemed place demonstrating such an important concept. But, suddenly I had an urge for a piece of my mother’s famous homemade chocolate cake with her special fudge frosting. As soon as I thought of the cake, my earthy mother was handing me the biggest piece of dark chocolate cake I had ever seen. Dare I say it was heavenly? Although she appeared there with us, I knew some part of her was still back on earth because she had not died yet. My guess was that she was probably asleep, dreaming of lovingly making her son a piece of her divine chocolate cake.
--
-Sandi T, 10/18/2020:
I understood immediately the fullness of life on this planet. I could see when it broke apart from a sun, spinning and cooling and collecting debris; until the first of these creatures heard itself laugh and understood the sound for what it was. In that moment, self-awareness was awakened and the seeds of civilization sprouted.
I understood that everything that we do here on Earth, all that we are, all that we experience, allows creation to exist. Every beautiful thing, every wonderful being and creature, whether on earth or in any universe, relies upon people who are on the extremely rare places like Earth.
The Great Intelligence (god) is a paradox. It is completely loving and fully unlimited. Which by the definition of paradox, means it is impossible? It cannot be limited only to love; it cannot be limited to only being unlimited; or it is not unlimited.
Earth is a place where the unlimited becomes limited; where the singular becomes many. Here, it can know community and loneliness. It can know heartache and hope. It can know all which an unlimited being of pure love cannot. It can conceive and perceive evil; which in truth it cannot do this either. To solve the paradox, it must experience helplessness and limitation and all as it is Real. In this place, it is all so REAL.
So what is free will? Free will is the option to come here to help solve the paradox of 'god'. To be all that we are not, so that everything wondrous and joyful may continue to exist. So that love itself may continue to exist. So that the Unlimited is not limited to being only unlimited.
Why are the answers always, 'simply to exist' and 'to choose love' and 'to learn how to love'? Because all you need to do, to solve the paradox, is to exist. And as we exist here, each time we choose love, we expand the universe. Love is life's longing for itself. Despite the reality of what we live, even the darkest souls among us cannot help but to reach, to yearn, and move towards goodness and towards love.
For love is the true nature of who we are. And when we experience horrible things, the question 'why' comes to mind because it is the central question of love, life, and of this world. The answer is 'so that all things might continue to exist.'
Every soul chose to come here and to suffer because of love. Each soul loves the universe, loves life, and loves this world and ALL of the worlds. Each soul loves ALL of the people so immensely and intensely that they chose to come here so that all the universes may teem with beautiful, joyful LIFE.
Every creature that I saw, acknowledges that your life gives them the gift of life. And when each soul goes 'home' after they die, they will know the rewards of their own gift, too. The 'reward' for their sacrifice will be joy, love, and feeling incredible, wonderful, beautiful joy at the LIFE and the LOVE everywhere in the universe.
When you go home, you meet your own soul. You willingly came here to forget yourself. You willingly came here to save every beautiful and wonderful thing. By suffering what 'god' cannot, you give the gift of life.
--
-Henry W, 6/22/2008:
I became aware of other voices, the orbs or other souls around me I could hear them communicating to each other. There seemed to be cliques of orbs that were together. They spoke to one another about their lives on Earth and all they had perceived and felt. They shared not only in words, but in sharing the experience. If one orb couldn't understand, it disappeared and then reappeared. The orb somehow went back to Earth and experienced that 'life' to further understand. I understood that here time did not exist and these beings could manifest themselves at any time on Earth they desired. These orbs or rather 'souls' would leave this realm, detach themselves with this universe, and return to the universe of our Earth. There they would live and die, then return and share the experience with all the other souls. A soul that could not understand the experience could go and live that life also to experience that life. I learned we have many lives, past, present and future.
These souls, our souls cannot experience certain things like pain, sorrow, hatred, and anger. Though these are negative things, it was important for them to understand and experience them. Perhaps to understand the motivations of human beings, or (and I believe this in my heart) to eventually evolve into a being like God - all knowing and understanding.
At this time things appeared to me, answers to other questions. I could see concepts as if they were entities. I could understand for the first time in my life E=MC2. I learned that our universe is one of many. It is like a Petri dish. Designed with its own rules to raise a specific being. In this case, to raise beings like humans. Each Universe had its own specific laws of Physics. I now realize that the amount of information a soul must learn is vast, more so then we can possibly imagine here.
The next concept or rule I learned is that God can never be proven by scientific means. To do so would corrupt the environment. It would destroy faith. When we have faith we seek, we learn. If God were to appear before us like a huge being at the United Nations, the entire world would believe, but also live in fear. To successfully experience the human existence, one must be physically out of touch with God. We have to learn and seek on our own. We need to search out the meaning of our own existence and experience here on earth. Faith is the engine of discovery. Without faith, we are just like ants.
I learned why bad things happen to good people. If nothing bad ever happened to us, we would all basically be the same. It is like metal in a forge you have to heat it and strike it repeatedly to make a useful tool from it. We start this life with a blank piece of paper. With every incident we experience, a part of the blueprint is recorded until a complete plan for an individual is created. This blueprint dictates the end of our lives. To live happily in this realm is to become aware of the blueprint and change it. Lastly, time is only a concept measured here. In the other realm, it doesn't exist. While we may experience pain and sorrow on earth, it is only a second in the grand scheme of things. We have an eternity to live and in reality, souls never really die. Our life is just a thought providing circumstances for this existence. As the soul progresses, this trauma is forgotten and put in its proper perspective as part of the learning process.
One question I always personally had and that was answered is, 'Are ghosts real?' The answer I was given was, 'Yes, in the human body there are two forms of spiritual being.' One is the 'soul', which is the spiritual being that has a symbiotic relationship with the physical body. The second is the being created by the 'biology' of the human body. This being is intelligent and is basically the personality of the individual. Its purpose is to provide for the human needs of food, hunger, survival, and procreation. This concept is very similar to Freud's 'Id, Ego and Superego' The division of mind and personality. The soul provides us with all the things of the individual that separates us from the Animal Kingdom. This is the ability to reason, use logic, or feel awe when seeing a sunset. The soul is the creative side of humankind. The second being is more our animal side and drives us to accomplish or pursue things to satisfy our needs and wants.
When we die, the soul separates and proceeds to the other side (forgive me for simplifying everything). The entity of the body dies, taking with it the strong emotions, 'baggage', and drives of human beings. This is a natural part of the dying process. However, sometimes under violent or sudden death this othebeing, for lack of a better word, doesn't have a chance to die. Instead, it remains behind as the drive, emotions, and motivation of our spirit. This body being, without the guidance of the soul is basically just a shell. It wanders about with no goals or purpose. It often repeats acts that it has done before because memories are the only 'guidance' that it has. In time, this being's energy dissipates and nothing is left. That process can take a long time. Hence, we have a 'ghost' that haunts a house or person. A ghost has the center of its existence when it was with its human body and soul. Here on earth it remains until it eventually vanishes. The ghost can be communicated with and guided, yet has no real will of its own but only that of habit.
--
-Peter P, 3/1/2023:
In the initial phase of waking up, I also received an experience with light of such a wonderful quality, that it is difficult to describe with words. I was shown three light waves on which today's humanity is evolving. For the sake of logic, I'm defining them here as the self-imposed pathways of awareness, that each individual can take to obtain the best possible results from their particular choice. The first way is what the main part of the global population has chosen and the daily struggle is enacted in that timeline. I don't want to give the impression that path is in any way better or superior than the other timelines. All experiences in human life eventually lead back to the divine light.
The second path was shown to me as a mixed way in a gray color. Here, euphoric phases are alternated in quick succession with depressive stages. It is as if people were switching between phases of competence and phases lacking of power, and then again to a new euphoric phase.
The third way is the one of the absolute victimhood. It was shown to me in colors dark and black. Power and responsibility were handed over to outer entities. Here only a very small part of the light spark can be addressed through motivation. Many beings of light from higher planes are providing a selfless service here, to again illuminate the way back to the light. This way corresponds with the absolute free choice of each individual as to whether they choose towards light or darkness.
I was also shown that in this darkness exists one of the most unbelievable choicess for humanity, because in this choice is also is the possibility to change the galaxy. The core truths of Love, Compassion, Kindness and Benevolence are towards what the human nature can and will evolve.
The first path of those three is so unbelievable for us incarnated beings. It can only be termed with definitions of Utopia, heavenly life of angels and/or ecstatic rapture.
There is a beautiful part of beings who always stay in this realm. They are dancing and singing through life. For them terms like synchronicity, grace, or cosmic guidance are the absolute central and essential elements in life. They realize how creation is working and that a life without the connection with the One Power of creation would disrupt everything. Humor, joy, fun, respect, compassion and gratitude is with them round the clock. In this wonderful place all fear is dissolved like mist in a brilliant sun. It is an all-encompassing field with absolute acceptance, comfort, peace, connectedness and a 100% awareness to be at the right place.
During this time of considering those things, I was guided by a wonderful being of light. I don't remember somebody else or meeting a certain individual. Only those impressions of the light of love and the perfect comprehension and acceptance remained.
In that moment, it simply seemed unbelievable and impossible to choose another path than the one of the light. What illuminates my life again and again from my light experience, is the irrepressible joy and happiness of an experience of indescribable beauty. I believe that all the people go through this same wonderful experience in a state of separation of the body (general anesthesia, unconsciousness) unfortunately they cannot all remember it.
I felt pure love, shining brighter than anything you can imagine. Everything is as beautiful, as pure as love and compassion. So that when you cross the veil and return to the other side you are becoming a part of it. We are bathing in the beauty of the song that makes our heart singing - That's God.
Nobody can give us something bigger. We wouldn't see it or understand it. That's Spirit in its highest form.
We as humans feel so alone and on our own. It's such a crushing feeling to remain in this imagined separation of our most wonderful thing and then to feel this earthly experience so painfully.
In the middle of life, a light experience happens that sweeps away all the reactions about this imaginary separation and dissolves the last doubts with this pure white light like a fog. It's the disintegration of a self-constructed veil that prevented a realization that all people are entitled to have as their birthright. It's delightful to know that the light is the most wonderful symphony in the cosmos and that it contains the colors and the sense of touch of the most beautiful experiences. A wonderful soul experience, that is imprinted in the deepest cells of the body.
For a moment I was on this other side of the veil. I was allowed to be part of this wonderful source of creation. Together with billions of points of light, which we call angel beings, shining brighter than the light. I was in the company of the highest compassion, with the highest Love.
All media, the total daily literature is filled with the dramas happening around the globe every minute.
How can somebody get the idea to write a text motivating us to get another point of view about the calamities in the world? What is motivating him to see the good in all those events, even if they might be so disturbing? That's probably the one decisive question for the survival of manhood. Thought power of the whole humanity is used to bring anarchy and separation between people. Human thoughts are creative and should, and can, be guided by us into appropriate pathways.
It depends on all of us to exercise our responsibility and to realize the true impact of our actions here in its entirety. We can't avoid to completely step away from all dramas. Disasters and calamities of humanity want to invite us to send our compassion and our benevolent energy generously towards the concerned people. Something which should be rather considered normal if our brothers and sister are in need.

The most significant moving object in your house, the garage door, is utilized daily throughout the year and at all hours. You must invest time in routine preventive maintenance and care if you want your garage door to run well for many years. You can appoint a licensed garage door service for the best repair. Below mentioned are the tips for maintaining your garage door:
Test the Garage Door Balance:
Your lift Master Garage Door Opener will have to work more and function less efficiently if it is not balanced correctly. The door should then be manually raised about halfway once the opener has been turned off by pulling the release lever, which is typically a red cord. The spring counterweight system is out of balance if it doesn't stay in place. Leave the adjustment of garage door springs to the experts.
Clear Tracks and Tighten Hardware:
Clear the tracks on the garage door's two sides of any rust and debris. Examine the brackets anchoring the ways to the wall and ceiling and the bolts holding the garage door opener device in place to tighten any loose bolts caused by door vibration.
Replace Weather Stripping:
The rubber weather stripping prevents the passage of trash, water, and cold. It can be purchased from big-box and hardware home improvement stores. The weather stripping on Roll-up Garage Doors is often fastened with nails. Replace this weather stripping on the bottom if it is ripped. If there is any loose weather stripping around the sides of the door, reattach it or replace it if it is very worn or damaged.
Partial words:
Remember that your garage door accounts for nearly one-third of the outside of your home, so maintain it neat. Call a garage door expert to schedule a tune-up service call if you don't have time to perform this check-up.
Website - https://garagedoorrepairvip.com/

"Would you like to have a near-death experience? By crossing the boundary between life and death."

Yukari Yakumo

Themes:

• Necrofantasia:
  
• Night Falls ~ Evening Star: 7.5, 10.5, 15.5
  
• Yorimashi Between Dreams and Reality ~ Necro-Fantasia
  

Yukari Yakumo is a legendary youkai with the ability to manipulate boundaries. She is one of the sages who created Gensokyo in the first place, and a good contender for its most powerful resident. Despite this she is also exceptionally lazy, spending most of her time sleeping and foisting most of the problems off on Reimu or Ran. Still, her incredible intelligence and completely inhuman nature means one can never tell quite what she's thinking, and making her angry is a very bad idea.

Notes

• Source Index
  
• Perfect Memento in Strict Sense and Symposium of Post Mysticism is an in universe book written by Hidea no Akyuu. She has a tendency to exaggerate and speculate, so her claims should be taken with a grain of salt.
  
• Yukari herself is noted to lie quite a lot, so her own claims should also be taken with a grain of salt.
  
• In 15.5 Yukari makes use of the urban legend Teke Teke, but her attacks while using this urban legend are fairly in line with her normal capabilities. As it's unclear what effect the Urban legend is having, these feats will be included in this section but marked with Occult
  
• Yukari scales to a large number of characters, so here is every Touhou respect thread for the games
  

Defining Some Terms

Spell Card System: The Spell Card Rules were put in place by Reimu Hakurei in order to make duels between everyone fair, formalized, and safe. It is also the method nearly all Touhou characters will use in-character. Spell card battles have very clearly defined rules and attacks that are agreed upon before a duel with the purpose being that the most beautiful attacks win. In general Spell Cards are characters going easy on the foe, with ZUN outright stating they're not something the characters would ever use if they were serious.

• Given the original rules of spell card battles and a characters being introduced to the spell card system stating it would prevent useless bloodshed, there is at least a decent amount of implication that Spell Card battles are inherently non-lethal.

Danmaku: Danmaku are the "bullets" fired in a bullet hell, take many different forms, and are able to be fired by most Gensokyo citizens. They're an essential part of duels in Gensokyo, being used to control an opponent's movement and overwhelm them. They can either be fired in intricate patterns, or just fired rapidly from a single point.

• Danmaku is intentionally not efficient or effective for serious combat
  
• Danmaku in general can be lethal to normal humans
  
• Danmaku from major characters is very consistently able to break rock
  
  • Seija is considered notably weak
  • Sanae is considered nothing special as far as humans in Gensokyo are concerned

Youkai: Supernatural beings typically born from humanity's fear of the unknown, and the primary residents of Gensokyo. Youkai can be highly varied, but tend to be highly resistant to physical attacks while far more weak to spiritual attacks, such as names and traditions.
Gensokyo: Genoskyo is the region Touhou takes place in, and is a small landlocked region of Japan. It is fully enclosed by the Great Hakurei Barrier (more information bellow). The clearest picture of it shows it containing a few mountains, with it also being noted Gensokyo is small enough to see almost all of it from the Hakurei shrine

• The Sages of Genoskyo (of which Yukari is a member) are the beings responsible for the creation and maintenance of Gensokyo

Urban Legend Incident: Due to the occult balls various Urban Legends begin to manifest in Gensokyo, and some characters are capable of controlling an urban legend in battle that matches their tempermant. It's worth noting that the effects are present even after the occult balls are removed from Gensokyo though Reisen notes it will soon settle down.

Boundary Manipulation

General Description: Summarized, Yukari's power allows her to manipulate the boundary between any two things.This can apply both to physical boundaries (such as between Gensokyo and the outside world), or even the boundary of concepts (such as human and youkai or night and day).

• Both her profile and she herself state that she can manipulate the boundary between any and all things
  
• An official magazine says her power can affect anything, and that for narrative purposes she has to limit herself to the spell card rule or it wouldn't even be a game
  
• The manual states the danger and potency of her power is beyond imagination
  
• Akyuu states that her power fundamentally undermines reality. She states that it can create new existence and reject existence, is the most powerful ability held by any youkai. Additionally she states it can be applied to pictures, peoples dreams, and even stories
  

Direct Combat Usage

• Feats/Statements
  
  • Being able to draw boundary lines along surfaces means there is nothing she can not split in two
    • Sumreiko comments on her seemingly cutting space, with opening gaps in space also being her main method of transportation (see below)
  • Her barriers can destroy large amounts of enemy danmaku and damage her foes
  • Creates a large boundary around the entirety of Suika's mist form, and then suddenly makes it much smaller to force her back into her physical form.
    • Suika's mist form covered all of Gensokyo
• General
  
  • Uses a barrier to block enemy danmaku and strikes
  • Creates a boundary line with her strikes to hit her foe
  • A fan granting her powers is able to crash through all obligations, directly hitting a foe while they're guarding
• Skills
  
  • Boundary of Intellect and Feet: Runs a straight boundary to split her foe
  • Universe of Matter and Antimatter: Creates two gaps that do nothing on their own, but when they collide they create a huge distortion attack
• Spell Cards
  
  • Border Sign "Quadruple Barrier": Creates several overlapping boundaries to produce a barrier that can strike foes
  • Sign I "Quadruple Barrier": Another version of the above spell card
  • Barrier "Charming Quadruple Barrier": A larger version of quadruple barrier that sucks the foe in
  • Boundary "Quadruple Barrier of the Imperishable Night": Creates a larger quadruple barrier to protect herself and attack her enemy
  • Border Sign "Boundary of 2D and 3D": Creates a boundary that travels along the screen edge and changes directions to follow the movements of the screen
  • Barrier "Objective Barrier": Fires off four linked borders that travel along the edges of the screen
• Last Word
  
  • [Occult] Lend Me Those Beautiful Legs!: Locks her foe in place with boundary lines and then uses a gap to split them in two before putting them back together

Gaps and Warping

• Feats/Statements
  
  • General
    • Able to travel to entirely different locations by opening up gaps in space, with (according to Akyuu) it being said that this can also access pictures, dreams, and even stories
    • Can open gaps in thin air
    • Opens up a large gap, and is gone when it clears away
    • Repositions a gap to use as a seat
    • Spiriting away Kosuzu doesn't leave a single trail any other youkai can follow to locate her, not even leaving a trace of her soul behind
  • Travel/Range
    
    • Uses gaps in space as her main means of transportation, with her warping around Gensokyo, up youkai mountain, and even to and from heaven (though how direct these trips are isn't clear given how the time of day changes)
    • Reimu states Yukari can travel anywhere she wants to in a flash
    • Is able to freely travel past the Great Hakurei Barrier into the outside world, and pulls Rinnosuke back into Gensokyo after he's accidentally pulled into the outside world
      • Casually travels out of Gensokyo to see cherry blossoms
      • Comments to Mamizou about what's currently going on in Sado
      • Sends Sumireko and dream Sumireko from Gensokyo to the outside world
    • Off screen travels overseas and brings back a Hobgoblin, which she states are a Western creature
    • Instantly sends Marisa from the Hakurei shrine to the forest of magic
    • Easily travels to the netherworld (though in Gensokyo the netherworld is a location you can physically travel to
      • Summons Ran and Chen to her while within the netherworld
    • Suddenly goes from behind Luna to in front of her
    • Disappears to somewhere... literally
    • Placed a gap in a doorway so that Flandre traveled from the Scarlet Devil mansion to deep underground without even realizing she had done so
    • Pulls Sumireko out of the dream world (though Doremy implies this isn't something she's supposed to do normally)
      • Reimu refers to the dream world as another reality that is two sides of the same coin with the real world
      • Is often lurking in the dream world
  • Utility
    
    • Claims to have an undending supply of electricity, kerosene, and nitroglycerin, and fills up Rinnosuke's heater with fuel while having a conversation with him, without him even realizing she had done anything
    • Covertly drops money into the shrine's donation box while having a conversation with Reimu
    • Puts a hand through a gap to block a hammer and grab a gameboy
    • Makes food disappear from right out from under Reimu's nose
    • Summons other characters like Reimu or Chen
    • Reimu implies Yukari can send just some body parts through the Great Hakurei Barrier
    • Left her arm dangling through a gap while asleep, and then puts her hand through another gap to douse a candle
    • Hid some of her own energy inside of a gap to revive herself after having all of her magical energy drained by Mizuchi's possession. Though she states it will soon run out and she needs to rest after. Also sticks her hands through gaps to grab cookies and wave at Reimu independently of her body
• General
  
  • Warps from one side of the screen to the other and grants Reimu the ability to do the same
  • Vanishes to dodge a spell card
  • Leans back into a gap while firing projectiles
  • Sticks her arm into a gap to strike her foe with an umbrella from another location
  • Drops into a gap and then appears in midair
  • After being knocked to the ground, creates a gap below and above her to redirect back to standing up
  • Opens a gap through which several pieces of wood fly out at her foe
  • Spawns street signs to attack her foe
  • Opens gaps through which rapid fire danmaku and lasers fire out
  • Summons a monstrous arm out of her gap to grab or strike her foe
• Skills
  
  • Rest on Stone, Rinse in Rivers: Opens up a hole that swallows up projectiles and stores them
  • Rinse with Stone, Rest in Rivers: Fires off stored projectiles
  • Chimera's Wings: Places a gap that she can then warp back to.
  • Fantasy Maniacal Rift: Disappears into a gap and keeps moving, before coming out to strike her foe
  • Flesh Dismantler: Drops down into a gap before leaping out while spinning her umbrella
  • Urashima's Box, Filled With Lament: Opens a gap in the sky to drop debris on her foe
  • Home is Where One Lays to Rest: Hits her foe with several pieces of wood
  • [Occult] World's Most Agile Torso: Uses a gap to send her upper body forward to attack her foe while her lower body remains in place
• Spell Cards
  
  • Evil Spirits "Yukari Yakumo's Spiriting Away": Repeatedly teleports around while firing off danmaku
  • "Boundary of Humans and Youkai": Vanishes entirely and attacks the foe with danmaku patterns while not physically present
  • Splitter "Thing That Splits All Into Two": Repeatedly jumps in and out of and moves through gaps while spinning her umbrella
  • Fantasy Nest "Flying Noctilucae's Nest": Opens up several gaps that fire danmaku forwards, always in the direction of the foe
  • Boundary "Overflowing Flotsam": Sends several pieces of wood flying at her foe
  • Abandoned Line "Aimless Journey to the Abandoned Station": Opens a gap through which an abandoned train comes from, though (in gameplay at least) it takes time to open the gap
  • "Unmanned Abandoned Railroad Car Bomb": Summons three train cars that fly into her foe before exploding

Great Hakurei Barrier

• The Barrier Itself
  
  • Feats/Statements
    • The Great Hakurei Barrier is a barrier of sense that surrounds all of Gensokyo, and keeps living creatures and their tools from passing through while allowing non-living things to pass through without issue. Via non-Euclidian space a person attempting to pass through the barrier will find themselves wandering endlessly, and they will find themselves back where they started upon turning around.
    • Even when Reimu and Marisa traveled to the moon they never left the barrier, and they consider getting through the barrier to be harder than going to the moon
    • Gensokyo is designed to be the opposite of the outside world, and things that contradict that concept cannot pass through the barrier
    • Akyuu states the barrier is a barrier of common sense and keeps the outside world's common sense outside, and that it's composed of multiple smaller barriers, but that it periodically weakens every 60 years
    • There is at least some difference in the seasons between Gensokyo and the outside world
    • Sumireko was unable to fully penetrate the barrier from the outside
  • Limits
    • Non-living things and certain creatures are able to pass through the barrier more easily
    • It's noted Remilia's scarlet mist would have spread past the boundary into the human world
    • Objects that violated common sense from the outside world being used on the barrier would threaten its very existence
• Manipulation
  
  • Yukari was one of the sages to suggest the creation of the Great Hakurei Barrier, though whether she's the actual creator is unclear. Reimu refers to her as the original creator but Yuyuko thinks the barrier is too strong for Yukari to make
  • States that she has torn holes in the barrier
  • Creates a powerful distortion in the barrier
  • Repairs the barrier after Reimu does something to weaken it
  • Whenever a human from the outside world wanders into Gensokyo, it's because of fluctuations in the barrier caused by her

Gensokyo's Boundary of Reality and Illusion

• General
  
  • Created a boundary of illusion and reality around Gensokyo, defining Gensokyo as illusionary and the outside world as real, so anything that becomes viewed as fantasy is pulled into Gensokyo, even from outside Japan. This was performed 500 years ago and still going strong.
  • Yukari seems to have at least some amount of awareness of those who enter and leave Gensokyo through this method
• Living Things
  
  • A snake wakes up in Gensokyo as soon as he transforms into a youkai, with Mamizou stating that when you turn into a youkai you wind up in Gensokyo. Said snake is potentially originally from India
  • When there's a demand for Zashiki-Warashi in the outside world they start vanishing from Gensokyo, and later return when that demand fades
  • New youkai created in the outside world immediately appear in Gensokyo as well, but due to not having a clear form they disappear just a quickly
  • Rinnosuke notes that Gensokyo is rather multicultural, as youkai brought with them foreign cultures as they were pulled into Gensokyo
  • A real life human shows up in Gensokyo after becoming a god
  • Animals that become endangered or extinct (at least in Japan) are more prevalent in Gensokyo
  • A completely ordinary seal winds up in Gensokyo after being forgotten while a youkai well integrated in human society could remain in the outside world
• Nonliving
  
  • Items that fall out of use in the outside world wind up in Gensokyo
  • People doubting or forgetting the moon landing is enough to cause several magazines about it to appear in Gensokyo as well as the Soyuz spacecraft
  • Lyrica implies that instruments and even noises can fall into fantasy
• Buildings
  
  • The Scarlet Devil Mansion is a western style mansion housing multiple powerful youkai that is assumed to have arrived in Gensokyo fairly recently, with Akyuu also noting that it seemingly wasn't designed for Japanese climates
  • Another western style mansion housing the Prismriver sister also exists in Gensokyo
  • Unused radio towers occasionally appear in Gensokyo
  • After Miko is forgotten by the outside world, her entire mausoleum arrives in Gensokyo
• Large Scale
  
  • Due to Kanako making it fall into fantasy the Moriya shrine and the nearby lake move to Gensokyo
  • According to legend the Bamboo Forest of the Lost appeared in Gensokyo after being washed away by a tsunami
  • It's thought (according to Keine) that Youkai Mountain in Gensokyo is the original mythical form Yatsugatake, before it had been torn down by a god, back when it was taller than Mt. Fuji

Misc

• Boundary of Reality and Illusion - Moon
  
  • Erases the boundary between the real and illusionary moon, turning a reflection of the moon in the water into a portal to the moon itself that allows for instantaneous travel
  • Can return to Earth by doing the same thing to a reflection of the Earth
  • Leaves the portal open by shoving an umbrella into it
  • The Watatsuki sisters state she can freely travel between the Earth and moon, and that she once brought a throng of youkai to the moon with her
  • Implies this can only be performed when the moon is completely full, and that she was trapped on the moon when the full waned more quickly than expected
• Netherworld
  
  • Weakened the barrier between Gensokyo and the Netherworld so Yuyuko could more easily enter Gensokyo. She is also responsible for its repair
    • The Netherworld's barrier weakening causes the boundary between life and death to become vague, with Youmu wondering if it's okay to leave the boundary between this world an the next so ambiguous, though Youmu also notes it hasn't changed up the natural order too much
  • States that she caused the borders between Hell and the Netherworld to fade
    • Both the Netherworld and Hell are massive, but it's not clear to what extent she actually merged them
• Lunar Capital
  
  • Breaks through the barrier of the lunar capital, but it takes her a while due to the complexity
    • This barrier separates the living fantastical moon from the scientific dead one, and requires a specific route in order to reach the capital
  • Opens a whole in the barrier hiding the house of the Lunar sage with her thumb, and leaves her glove in the gap so that Yuyuko and Youmu can later use it to enter the Lunar Captial
• Misc Conceptual
  
  • States she can manipulate the boundary between Gensokyo and the outside world, the worlds of the living and the dead, human and youkai, or even day and night
  • Claims she can give the immortal Mokou a near death experience by manipulating the boundary of life and death
  • States she thinned the barrier between human and youkai, possibly making Reimu a youkai temporarily
    • States she could set the boundary between human and youkai for Mai and Satano to make them one or the other
  • Manipulates the boundary between daylight and moonlight to cause both to happen at the same time
  • Makes the moon as bright as daytime by manipulating the boundary between day and night
  • Marisa speculates that Yukari manipulated the border between danmaku for play and danmaku for combat for one of her attacks
  • States she can easily manipulate the boundary between spring and winter
  • States she causes noctambulism (sleep walking) in humans by manipulating the boundary between asleep and awake
  • Manipulates the boundary of master and slave, causing both teams using perfect possession to swap said roles
    • Doing this required interfering with the dream world

Other Abilities

Note that a number of feats here potentially involve boundary manipulation, but it's less explicit
Energy Projection

• Feats
  
  • Individual needles can break rock, and destroy a large boulder with sustained fire
  • Effortlessly defeats the three fairies of light, throwing out projectiles made of light and non-light
  • Marisa considers Yukari's danmaku harder to deal with than Yuyuko's
  • Surrounds herself with rings of danmaku
• General
  
  • Fires out large amounts of danmaku in various patterns
  • Fires off danmaku in front of her with a swing of her fan
  • Attacks with lines of energy
  • Fires off several orbs trailed by lines of energy
  • Creates spirals of energy around her body
  • Using a bomb, unleashes a pulse of energy that knocks back her foe
• Skills
  
  • Purple Needles of Painful Reproach: Rapid fires needles in front of her
  • Bewitching Bait: Creates a bird's eye that high speed projectiles then fly through at random paths
  • Spacetime Seam: Creates a pulse of energy projectiles in all directions around her, possibly by cracking space
• Spell Cards
  
  • Standard Danmaku Pattern
    • Barrier "Curse of Dreams and Reality"
    • Barrier "Balance of Motion and Stillness"
    • Barrier "Mesh of Light and Darkness"
    • Evil Spirits "Dreamland of Straight and Curve"
    • Evil Spirits "Bewitching Butterfly Living in the Zen Temple"
    • Sinister Spirits "Double Black Death Butterfly"
    • Barrier "Boundary of Life and Death"
    • Yukari's Arcanum "Danmaku Barrier"
    • Outer Force "Infinite Superspeed Flying Object"
    • Border Sign "Boundary of Form and Emptiness"
    • Border Sign "Boundary of Wave and Particle"
    • Photon "Doppler Effect"
    • Aerial Bait "Hyperactive High Speed Flying Object"
    • "Yakumo's Nest"
    • "Impossible Danmaku Barrier"
    • "Casebook of Luck, Resilience and Perseverance"
  • Combo Attack with Others
    • "Perfect Possession and Dream Seal": With Reimu
    • "Boundary of Spirit Medium and Divine Spirit": With Reimu
    • "Secret God Barrier": With Okina
    • "Shoot the Danmaku Barrier!": With Marisa
    • "Unauthorized Danmaku Photography is Strictly Prohibited": With Reimu
    • Paper Sign "Barrier-Enclosed Zener Card Shuriken": With Sumireko
  • Misc
    • Aerial Bait "Addictive Bait": Opens several locations through which high speed projectiles travel from
    • Fantasy "Perpetual Motion Machine of the First Kind": Creates a perpetual motion device that automatically fires danmaku without her input
    • Spirit Medium's Melancholy: Fires off danmaku that only hits one part of a perfect possession duo
• Last Word
  
  • "Profound Danmaku Barrier -Phantasm, Foam and Shadow-": Creates an everlasting bullet pattern with her finger deciding its life and death

Shikigami: Shikigami are spirits that have been turned into tools via a patter, that have software installed to control them

• Feats/Statmenents
  
  • Has the ability to control shikigami, which like computers will follower her commands exactly. Her primary shikigami is Ran, who herself has her own shikigami Chen
  • Has shikigami possess various crows which she uses for scouting
    • A crow rapidly flies over large swaths of the lunar surface in what is implied to be a short span of time. Its flight is also described as unnaturally straight, with it following the special path required to reach the Lunar Capital with computer-like accuracy
    • [Limit] A crow is killed by being possessed exposed to the vacuum of space
  • Has eyes all over Gensokyo... literally, with this eyes noted to be her familiars
• Skills
  
  • "Apparotation Needle": Has Ran chase after he foes while firing off danmaku
  • Eyes that View Change: Opens a gap holding an eye, which attacks the enemy when it sees a weakpoint based on specific programming
• Spell Cards
  
  • Summoning Rand and or Chen to attack enemies
    • Shikigami "Ran Yakumo"
    • Sign III "Ran Yakumo"
    • Shikigami "Ran Yakumo +"
    • Shikigami "Chen"
    • Shikigami "Ran Yakumo & Chen":
  • Other
    • Magic Eye "Laplace's Demon": Opens up several gaps holding eyes which attack when they see an exploitable weak point

Umbrella

• General
  
  • Hits her foe by spinning her umbrella
  • Creates spirals of energy around her umbrella
• Skills
  
  • Bewitching Butterfly Lurking in the Zen Temple: Envelopes her umbrella in energy and spins it while slamming into her foe
  • Fantasy Manji-Parasol: Gathers spiritual energy on her umbrella, then spins and fires it off as a projectile
  • Full Moon Umbrella: Creates a ring of energy around herself with a swing of her umbrella
• Spell Cards
  
  • Sign II "Manji-Parasol of Yakumo"

Senses

• Sees the human village despite Keine attempting to hide it by trying to make it appear that nothing had ever been there by eating its history
  
• Youkai can see perfectly by moonlight
  
• Claims to see the backside of the moon bathed with sunlight, even during a new moon
  
• Detects that a tree is from the outside world
  
• Eavesdrops on Sakuya's conversation while not physically present, and speaks to Reisen before warping to the location
  
• Claims to clearly see the launch of the Scarlet Devil Mansion's rocket from a ways away
  
• Senses Eiki's presence
  
• Senses the weakening of the Great Hakurei Barrier while presumably asleep
  
• Realizes the Shinmyoumaru in front of her isn't the normal one
  
• Sees the outside world beyond the Great Hakurei Barrier
  
• Sees the flow of energy from living things and helps Youmu to understand it
  
• Able to see the god that Utsuho had absorbed the power of
  

Here are all of the new US CHAdeMO (Leaf fast-charging) stations that rolled out in May 2023, according to the U.S. Department of Energy.
There were 124 "new" CHAdeMOs added in May. To put it in perspective, there were 112 CHAdeMO chargers added in April. I think the pace of CHAdeMO rollout has stabilized, while the pace of CCS rollout is still increasing. This makes sense given that only Nissan still makes a CHAdeMO car.
Some of these chargepoints will be "refreshes," e.g. the provider replaced them with faster chargers etc. Some may be incorrect. This report is only as good as the Alternative Fuels Data Center data.
We all know that CHAdeMO is a legacy format and will eventually go away, but clearly Nissan and their partners are continuing to support it for the time being. This shouldn't be surprising. After all, you can still buy a new Leaf.
If you'd like to know about new chargers along your routes right away, or reading these monthly reports is just frustrating in your state, I've set up a free service that provides email notifications only when new stations actually open. You can sign up at evpov.com. I built it to help EV owners like myself (especially my fellow Leaf owners). You can pick other plug types as well.
To streamline this post, multi-chargepoint locations are listed with the number of chargepoints first, so that's why the post is shorter than in previous months.

➡ CA (1) Fairfield Inn & Suites 8700 Spectrum Pkwy Bakersfield, CA 93308 (1) MOSSY CDJR DC 1 1875 Auto Park Ave Chula Vista, CA 91911 (3) DC CORRIDOR CHEVRON C DC 2 25032 W Dorris Ave Coalinga, CA 93210 (1) South Coast Collection (SoCo) 3303 Hyland Ave Costa Mesa, CA 92626 (1) SCPPA SCPPA CPE200T 1160 Nicole Ct Glendora, CA 91740 (1) Mojave Air & Spaceport (Building 1) 16922 Airport Blvd Mojave, CA 93501 (1) Albertsons 1345 (Morro Bay, CA) 730 Quintana Road Morro City, CA 93442 (1) CircleK - Palm Desert, CA 78005 Country Club Dr Palm Desert, CA 92211 (1) Hilton Garden Inn 20 Advantage Ct Sacramento, CA 95834 (1) BoA Hillcrest CA0-120 (San Diego, CA) 737 UNIVERSITY AVE San Diego, CA 92103 (1) WinCo Foods - Vacaville #60 855 Davis St Vacaville, CA 95687 ➡ CO (1) CITY OF ASPEN RIO GRANDE L3 427 Rio Grande Pl Aspen, CO 81611 (4) CSG EV BOULDER PL4 1500 Pearl St Boulder, CO 80302 (1) CircleK - Colorado City, CA 8950 S Interstate 25 Colorado City, CO 81004 (2) GPM INVESTMENTS 4590 DC1 8105 N Academy Blvd Colorado Springs, CO 80920 (2) KUM & GO CRAIG PL2 700 East Victory Way Craig, CO 81625 (1) DINO WELCOME DINOSAUR PL1 101 Stegosaurus Freeway Dinosaur, CO 81610 (2) PIKES PK CHARGE BA.CA.MI LLC #2 11027 US-24 Divide, CO 80814 (3) ANNEX SITE GEORGETOWN PL2 1120 Argentine Street Georgetown, CO 80444 (4) KUM & GO RIFLE PL4 705 Taugenbaugh Boulevard Rifle, CO 81650 (2) KUM & GO SB SPRINGS PL2 80 Anglers Drive Steamboat Springs, CO 80487 ➡ FL (1) JNKNS JACKSONVI DC FAST 2 11107 Atlantic Blvd Jacksonville, FL 32225 (1) Starbucks 9200 FL-228 Macclenny, FL 32063 (1) Ocean Cadillac 17800 Ipco Road Miami, FL 33162 (1) Sun Plaza 6339 W Colonial Dr Orlando, FL 32818 (1) BHY CHARGER 1 9915 E Adamo Dr Tampa, FL 33619 (1) Chase Bank - 5601 Red Bug Lake Rd 5601 Red Bug Lake Rd Winter Springs, FL 32708 ➡ GA (1) GEORGIA POWER EPICENTER DC1 135 riverside parkway SW Austell, GA 30168 (1) JACKSON EMC GAINESVILLE 1000 Dawsonville Highway Gainesville, GA 30501 ➡ IN (1) AVON HYUNDAI SALES 8775 E 36 Avon, IN 46123 (1) HOC CHARGERS CHARGER #1 4200 E 96th St Indianapolis, IN 46240 ➡ KS (1) HATCHETT FRONT_WEST 11200 E Central Ave Wichita, KS 67206 (1) HATCHETT BACK EAST 11330 E Central Ave Wichita, KS 67206 ➡ KY (1) JEFF WYLER FH EXPRESS 250 949 Burlington Pike Florence, KY 41042 ➡ MA (6) MASSPORT TNC 4 226 Porter St Boston, MA 02128 (2) MASSPORT TAXI 4 56 Harborside Dr Boston, MA 02128 ➡ MD (2) POTOMAC EDISON ROCKY GAP DC1 16701 Lakeview Rd NE Flintstone, MD 21530 ➡ ME (1) DARLINGS HYUNDA SALES CHARGER 2 439 Western Ave Augusta, ME 04330 (2) IRVINGOIL ME-FFLD-L3-0001 206 Center Rd Fairfield, ME 04937 (1) MOBIL ONTHEWAY STATION 1 1930 Lisbon Street Lewiston, ME 04240 (1) MOBIL ONTHEWAY STATION 2 1938 Lisbon St Lewiston, ME 04240 ➡ MI (1) Belle Isle DC Fast Charge 176 Lakeside Dr Detroit, MI 48207 (1) Evergetic Charging Spa 330 South Martin Luther King Junior Boulevard Lansing, MI 48915 ➡ MN (1) WINNER GAS BROOKDALE DR 1500 Brookdale Dr Minneapolis, MN 55444 ➡ NC (1) CAPE HATTERAS AVON PIER DCFC2 41001 North Carolina Hwy 12 Avon, NC 27915 (1) AEMC- AEMC HQ FAST 125 Cooperative Way Hertford, NC 27944 (1) Chestnut Arbor 2925 Weddington Matthews Rd Matthews, NC 28105 ➡ NE (1) ERNST CHARGER 1 EAC CHARGER 615 23rd St E Columbus, NE 68601 ➡ NJ (1) ShopRite Carteret - Wakefern #511 801 Roosevelt Ave Carteret, NJ 07008 (2) FREEHOLDHYUNDAI VERIZON 1 4075 9 Freehold Township, NJ 07728 (2) CLASS 3 CHARGER HYUNDAI-2 250 Rte 4 Paramus, NJ 07652 (1) CIRCLEAUTOGROUP CH- CPE250 1 641 Shrewsbury Ave Shrewsbury, NJ 07702 (1) ROUTE 1 HYUNDAI CPE-250-02 3905 US 1 South Brunswick Township, NJ 08852 (1) ROUTE 1 HYUNDAI RT1-01 3913 US-1 South Brunswick Township, NJ 08852 ➡ NY (1) AAA WESTCENTRAL DC FAST CHARGER 100 International Dr Amherst, NY 14221 (2) KEELER STATION 6 1111 Troy Schenectady Rd Latham, NY 12110 (1) LEXUSMIDDLETOWN STATION 1 3496 US-6 Middletown, NY 10940 (3) BOB JOHNSON BOB JOHNSON KIA 3817 W Henrietta Rd Rochester, NY 14623 ➡ OH (2) CRESTMONT DRIVECRESTMONT2 2961 Center Rd Brunswick, OH 44212 (1) Hampton Inn - Canton 5256 Broadmoor Cir NW Canton, OH 44709 (1) JEFF WYLER EXPRESS 250 Loop @ Far Hills Centerville, OH 45459 (1) DONWOODAUTO DW CHEVY 2 12916 OH-664 Logan, OH 43138 (1) JEFF WYLER CORP 4- DC FAST 401 Milford Pkwy Milford, OH 45150 (1) Friendship Kitchen 70 3800 E. State Rd. Port Clinton, OH 43452 (1) Friendship Kitchen 83 4024 Hayes Ave. Sandusky, OH 44870 ➡ OK (1) EDMOND HYUNDAI EDMOND 4 14137 N Broadway Ext Edmond, OK 73013 ➡ OR (1) PGE IBEW 48 15937 NE Airport Way Portland, OR 97230 ➡ PA (1) DOYLESTOWN 024B1000008033 4465 W Swamp Rd Doylestown, PA 18902 (2) LIBERTY CHARWASH PL 2 2595 Maryland Road Willow Grove, PA 19090 ➡ PR (2) BMW AUTOGERMANA CPE 250 PKNG 2 106 Calle Acuarela Guaynabo, PR 00969 (2) BMW AUTOGERMANA FTZ120KW-2 1086 Ave. Muñoz Rivera San Juan, PR 00919 ➡ SC (1) Travelers Rest Municipal Complex 125 Trailblazer Dr Travelers Rest, SC 29690 ➡ TN (4) I24 EXIT11 STATION 1 (LL) 701 Sango Road Clarksville, TN 37043 (2) DISTRICT 2 STATION 1 (L) 28 S Park Ave Hohenwald, TN 38462 (2) LAWRENCEBURG STATION 2 (R) 2347 Hwy 43 N Leoma, TN 38468 (1) MB OF MEMPHIS STATION 1 5401 Poplar Ave Memphis, TN 38119 ➡ TX (1) Plaza de Oro 4450 W Jefferson Blvd Dallas, TX 75211 ➡ UT (2) VOLVO CAR USA SANDY DC 2 56 W 9000 S Sandy, UT 84070 ➡ VA (2) KOONS HYUNDAI STATION 1 1880 Opitz Blvd Woodbridge, VA 22191 ➡ WA (2) HANSON MOTORS HM3 QUICKCHARGE 2300 Carriage Loop SW Olympia, WA 98502 (1) Walmart 2539 - Spokane Valley, WA 15727 E Broadway Ave Spokane Valley, WA 99037 (1) 7054 -Vancouver, WA 98664 (10314 SE Mill Plain Road) 13014 SE Mill Plain Rd Vancouver, WA 98684 ➡ WI (1) BERG HYUNDAI VLI-L3-PDI-4 2900 N Victory Ln Appleton, WI 54913 (1) Wheelers Chevrolet of Coloma 1978 Charles Way Coloma, WI 54930 (1) Wheelers Chevrolet GMC of Marshfield 2701 S. Maple Ave Marshfield, WI 54449 

Here are all of the new US CCS (Level 3 fast-charging) stations that rolled out in May 2023, according to the Department of Energy. These chargers are suitable for most new EVs on the market, except for:

1. Tesla drivers who haven't bought the official CCS adapter yet. Certain older Teslas need additional work done to accept the adapter.
2. Leaf owners like me, and some owners of older cars that also use CHAdeMO. If you drive a Leaf, or an older CHAdeMO car, see my matching post in leaf.

Some of these chargepoints will be "refreshes," e.g. the provider replaced them with faster chargers etc. Some may be incorrect. This report is only as good as the Alternative Fuels Data Center data.
There were 222 CCS charge points added or refreshed in May 2023, which is up from 171 in April. For comparison, there were only 74 new CCS charge points in May 2022. Things are speeding up.
"What about CCS charging at Tesla superchargers?" Tesla is in the process of rolling out their "magic dock" for non-Tesla cars, but so far in very few locations. If they start doing this at scale and reporting it to the Alternative Fuels Data Center then it will be reflected here.
"What about Ford vehicles with NACS (Tesla) plugs?" They are not on sale yet. Current-generation Ford vehicles have CCS plugs. The next generation will have NACS (Tesla) plugs, but will also support CCS via an adapter.
If you'd like to know about new chargers along your routes right away, or just prefer not to check this list monthly when new openings are rare in your area, I've set up a free service that provides email notifications as soon as they open. You can sign up at evpov.com. Or not! I don't really have a business plan here, I built it to help EV owners like myself.
To streamline this post, multi-chargepoint locations are listed with the number of chargepoints first, so that's why the post is shorter than in previous months.

➡ AR (1) Franklin's Charging Little Rock 724 Woodrow St Little Rock, AR 72205 ➡ AZ (6) 942 E Parma Street (US-CMK-NVL-2A) 942 E Parma Street Gila Bend, AZ 85337 (1) Kroger Frys 62 (Mesa, AZ) 554 W Baseline Rd Mesa, AZ 85210 ➡ CA (1) Fairfield Inn & Suites 8700 Spectrum Pkwy Bakersfield, CA 93308 (1) MOSSY CDJR DC 1 1875 Auto Park Ave Chula Vista, CA 91911 (3) DC CORRIDOR CHEVRON C DC 2 25032 W Dorris Ave Coalinga, CA 93210 (1) South Coast Collection (SoCo) 3303 Hyland Ave Costa Mesa, CA 92626 (1) SCPPA SCPPA CPE200T 1160 Nicole Ct Glendora, CA 91740 (1) Chase Bank - 925 N Hacienda Blvd 925 N Hacienda Blvd La Puente, CA 91744 (1) WOODLANDHILLS ABB 24KW 01 22006 Erwin Street Los Angeles, CA 91367 (1) 7071 - Merced, CA (2020 Childs Ave) 2020 Childs Ave Merced, CA 95341 (1) Mojave Air & Spaceport (Building 1) 16922 Airport Blvd Mojave, CA 93501 (1) BMW MONROVIA OFF NETWORK 01 1425 Mountain Ave Monrovia, CA 91016 (1) Albertsons 1345 (Morro Bay, CA) 730 Quintana Road Morro City, CA 93442 (1) 3333 Fruitvale Ave 3333 Fruitvale Ave Oakland, CA 94602 (1) 7126 - Oakley, CA (5540 Bridgehead Road) 5540 Bridgehead Road Oakley, CA 94561 (1) CircleK - Palm Desert, CA 78005 Country Club Dr Palm Desert, CA 92211 (1) Hilton Garden Inn 20 Advantage Ct Sacramento, CA 95834 (1) BoA Hillcrest CA0-120 (San Diego, CA) 737 UNIVERSITY AVE San Diego, CA 92103 (1) WinCo Foods - Vacaville #60 855 Davis St Vacaville, CA 95687 ➡ CO (1) CITY OF ASPEN RIO GRANDE L3 427 Rio Grande Pl Aspen, CO 81611 (4) CSG EV BOULDER PL4 1500 Pearl St Boulder, CO 80302 (5) 1 Flatiron Crossing (US-ME8-73R-2B) 1 Flatiron Crossing Broomfield, CO 80021 (1) CircleK - Colorado City, CA 8950 S Interstate 25 Colorado City, CO 81004 (2) GPM INVESTMENTS 4590 DC1 8105 N Academy Blvd Colorado Springs, CO 80920 (2) KUM & GO CRAIG PL2 700 East Victory Way Craig, CO 81625 (1) DINO WELCOME DINOSAUR PL1 101 Stegosaurus Freeway Dinosaur, CO 81610 (2) PIKES PK CHARGE BA.CA.MI LLC #2 11027 US-24 Divide, CO 80814 (4) ANNEX SITE GEORGETOWN PL4 1120 Argentine Street Georgetown, CO 80444 (4) KUM & GO RIFLE PL4 705 Taugenbaugh Boulevard Rifle, CO 81650 (2) KUM & GO SB SPRINGS PL2 80 Anglers Drive Steamboat Springs, CO 80487 ➡ CT (1) BOA East Hartford CT2-120 (Hartford, CT) 805 E Main Street East Hartford, CT 06108 (1) HARTFORD BMW ABB OUTSIDE 1 Weston Park Rd Hartford, CT 06120 ➡ DE (1) First State Chevrolet 22694 DUPONT BLVD GEORGETOWN, DE 19947 ➡ FL (1) JNKNS JACKSONVI DC FAST 2 11107 Atlantic Blvd Jacksonville, FL 32225 (1) Simon Tampa Premium Outlets (Lutz, FL) 2300 Grand Cypress Dr Lutz, FL 33559 (1) Starbucks 9200 FL-228 Macclenny, FL 32063 (1) Ocean Cadillac 17800 Ipco Road Miami, FL 33162 (1) Sun Plaza 6339 W Colonial Dr Orlando, FL 32818 (1) Simon Orlando Vineland (Orlando, FL) 8200 Vineland Ave Orlando, FL 32821 (1) Simon Tyrone Square (St Petersburg, FL) 6901 22nd Ave N Peterburg, FL 33710 (1) BHY CHARGER 1 9915 E Adamo Dr Tampa, FL 33619 (1) Chase Bank - 5601 Red Bug Lake Rd 5601 Red Bug Lake Rd Winter Springs, FL 32708 ➡ GA (1) GEORGIA POWER EPICENTER DC1 135 riverside parkway SW Austell, GA 30168 (1) JACKSON EMC GAINESVILLE 1000 Dawsonville Highway Gainesville, GA 30501 ➡ IL (1) Castle Chevrolet North 175 N Arlington Heights Rd Elk Grove Village, IL 60007 (1) Sunrise Chevrolet 414 E N Ave Glendale Heights, IL 60139 ➡ IN (1) AVON HYUNDAI SALES 8775 E 36 Avon, IN 46123 (1) SHRM CHRG MERCEDESBENZFW 7227 W Jefferson Blvd Fort Wayne, IN 46804 (1) HOC CHARGERS CHARGER #1 4200 E 96th St Indianapolis, IN 46240 (1) Sullivan Cadillac 4040 SW College Rd Ocala, IN 34474 ➡ KS (1) HATCHETT FRONT_WEST 11200 E Central Ave Wichita, KS 67206 (1) HATCHETT BACK EAST 11330 E Central Ave Wichita, KS 67206 ➡ KY (1) JEFF WYLER FH EXPRESS 250 949 Burlington Pike Florence, KY 41042 ➡ LA (1) All Star Automotive 12730 Airline Highway Baton Rouge, LA 70817 (1) Target T1469 (Monroe, LA) 4103 Pecanland Mall Dr Monroe, LA 71203 ➡ MA (6) MASSPORT TNC 4 226 Porter St Boston, MA 02128 (2) MASSPORT TAXI 4 56 Harborside Dr Boston, MA 02128 (1) Littleton Electric Light & Water Department 39 Ayer Road Littleton, MA 01460 ➡ MD (2) POTOMAC EDISON ROCKY GAP DC1 16701 Lakeview Rd NE Flintstone, MD 21530 ➡ ME (1) DARLINGS HYUNDA SALES CHARGER 2 439 Western Ave Augusta, ME 04330 (2) IRVINGOIL ME-FFLD-L3-0001 206 Center Rd Fairfield, ME 04937 (1) MOBIL ONTHEWAY STATION 1 1930 Lisbon Street Lewiston, ME 04240 (1) MOBIL ONTHEWAY STATION 2 1938 Lisbon St Lewiston, ME 04240 ➡ MI (1) Belle Isle DC Fast Charge 176 Lakeside Dr Detroit, MI 48207 (1) Meijer 254 (Hudsonville, MI) 4075 32nd Ave Hudsonville, MI 49426 (1) Evergetic Charging Spa 330 South Martin Luther King Junior Boulevard Lansing, MI 48915 (1) Genesis Cadillac 19900 E Nine Mile Road St Clair Shores, MI 48080 (1) MBSTL ENTRANCE ABB 1048 Hampton Avenue St. Louis, MI 63139 (1) Range USA Ypsilanti 660 James L Hart Pkwy Ypsilanti, MI 48197 ➡ MN (1) WINNER GAS BROOKDALE DR 1500 Brookdale Dr Minneapolis, MN 55444 ➡ MO (1) GM - Allen Christian Buick GMC Inc 724 W Business US Highway 60, Dexter, MO 63841 (1) Store 290 Joplin - 2101 S. Prigmore &I44 2101 S Prigmore Joplin, MO 64804 ➡ MS (1) 1685 High St 1685 High St Jackson, MS 39202 ➡ NC (1) CAPE HATTERAS AVON PIER DCFC2 41001 North Carolina Hwy 12 Avon, NC 27915 (1) Westcott Buick GMC 2410 S CHURCH ST BURLINGTON, NC 27215 (1) 9960 Poplar Tent Rd 9960 Poplar Tent Rd Concord, NC 28027 (1) AEMC- AEMC HQ FAST 125 Cooperative Way Hertford, NC 27944 (1) Capital Hyundai of Jacksonville 2325 N Marine Blvd Jacksonville, NC 28546 (1) Chestnut Arbor 2925 Weddington Matthews Rd Matthews, NC 28105 ➡ NE (1) ERNST CHARGER 1 EAC CHARGER 615 23rd St E Columbus, NE 68601 ➡ NH (1) Berlin City Chevrolet 545 MAIN STREET GORHAM, NH 03581 (2) Tanger Tilton Under Armour 06-07 120 Laconia Road Tilton, NH 03256 ➡ NJ (1) ShopRite Carteret - Wakefern #511 801 Roosevelt Ave Carteret, NJ 07008 (1) Lester Glenn Freehold 3712 Rte 9 Freehold, NJ 07728 (2) FREEHOLDHYUNDAI VERIZON 1 4075 9 Freehold Township, NJ 07728 (2) CLASS 3 CHARGER HYUNDAI-2 250 Rte 4 Paramus, NJ 07652 (1) CIRCLEAUTOGROUP CH- CPE250 1 641 Shrewsbury Ave Shrewsbury, NJ 07702 (1) ROUTE 1 HYUNDAI CPE-250-02 3905 US 1 South Brunswick Township, NJ 08852 (1) ROUTE 1 HYUNDAI RT1-01 3913 US-1 South Brunswick Township, NJ 08852 (1) Lester Glenn Buick-GMC 230 RTE 37 E TOMS RIVER, NJ 08753 (1) Lester Glenn Chevrolet 398 Rt 37 Toms River, NJ 08753 ➡ NY (1) AAA WESTCENTRAL DC FAST CHARGER 100 International Dr Amherst, NY 14221 (2) KEELER STATION 6 1111 Troy Schenectady Rd Latham, NY 12110 (1) LEXUSMIDDLETOWN STATION 1 3496 US-6 Middletown, NY 10940 (1) Lerner NYC Station Plaza (Port Jefferson Station, NY) 5145 Nesconset Highway Port Jefferson Station, NY 11776 (3) BOB JOHNSON BOB JOHNSON KIA 3817 W Henrietta Rd Rochester, NY 14623 (1) Burr Truck Level 3 DC Fast Charge 2901 Vestal Rd Vestal, NY 13850 ➡ OH (1) Serra Chevrolet 3281 S Arlington Rd Akron, OH 44312 (1) Tim Lally Chevrolet 24999 Miles Rd Bedford Heights, OH 44128 (2) CRESTMONT DRIVECRESTMONT2 2961 Center Rd Brunswick, OH 44212 (1) Lambert Buick GMC 2409 FRONT ST CUYAHOGA FALLS, OH 44221 (1) Hampton Inn - Canton 5256 Broadmoor Cir NW Canton, OH 44709 (1) JEFF WYLER EXPRESS 250 Loop @ Far Hills Centerville, OH 45459 (1) DONWOODAUTO DW CHEVY 2 12916 OH-664 Logan, OH 43138 (2) WAG ABB STATION 1 8457 N Springboro Pike Miamisburg, OH 45342 (1) JEFF WYLER CORP 4- DC FAST 401 Milford Pkwy Milford, OH 45150 (1) Friendship Kitchen 70 3800 E. State Rd. Port Clinton, OH 43452 (1) Friendship Kitchen 83 4024 Hayes Ave. Sandusky, OH 44870 (1) Serpentini Chevrolet of Strongsville 15303 Royalton Rd Strongsville, OH 44136 (1) Don's Automotive Group 720 N SHOOP AVE WAUSEON, OH 43567 (1) Bush Auto Place 1850 Rombach Avenue Wilmington, OH 45177 ➡ OK (1) EDMOND HYUNDAI EDMOND 4 14137 N Broadway Ext Edmond, OK 73013 ➡ OR (6) 12000 SE 82nd Ave (US-H8H-UM5-2A) 12000 SE 82nd Ave Happy Valley, OR 97086 (1) PGE IBEW 48 15937 NE Airport Way Portland, OR 97230 ➡ PA (1) DOYLESTOWN 024B1000008033 4465 W Swamp Rd Doylestown, PA 18902 (2) LIBERTY CHARWASH PL 2 2595 Maryland Road Willow Grove, PA 19090 (1) Bergeys Inc 518 RTE 309 colmar, PA 18915 ➡ PR (2) BMW AUTOGERMANA CPE 250 PKNG 2 106 Calle Acuarela Guaynabo, PR 00969 (2) BMW AUTOGERMANA FTZ120KW-2 1086 Ave. Muñoz Rivera San Juan, PR 00919 ➡ RI (1) Paul Masse Chevrolet 1111 Taunton Ave East Providence, RI 02914 ➡ SC (1) Travelers Rest Municipal Complex 125 Trailblazer Dr Travelers Rest, SC 29690 ➡ TN (4) I24 EXIT11 STATION 1 (LL) 701 Sango Road Clarksville, TN 37043 (2) DISTRICT 2 STATION 1 (L) 28 S Park Ave Hohenwald, TN 38462 (2) LAWRENCEBURG STATION 2 (R) 2347 Hwy 43 N Leoma, TN 38468 (1) MB OF MEMPHIS STATION 1 5401 Poplar Ave Memphis, TN 38119 ➡ TX (1) Friendly Chevrolet 2754 North Stemmons Way Dallas, TX 75207 (1) Plaza de Oro 4450 W Jefferson Blvd Dallas, TX 75211 (1) Shell 3302 S Eastman Rd Longview, TX 75602 (1) 3220 Gulf Fwy 3220 Gulf Fwy Texas City, TX 77591 ➡ UT (2) VOLVO CAR USA SANDY DC 2 56 W 9000 S Sandy, UT 84070 ➡ VA (1) BLACKWELL D1 4874 Riverside Dr Danville, VA 24541 (1) Fleet Management Site (For Testing Purpose Only) 512 Herndon Pkwy Herndon, VA 20170 (6) 2577 Jeb Stuart Highway (US-TDM-SCC-1C) 2577 Jeb Stuart Highway Meadows of Dan, VA 24120 (5) 2203 Franklin Road Southwest (US-TUJ-L2K-2C) 2203 Franklin Road Southwest Roanoke, VA 24014 (6) 437 Tiffany Drive (US-CHT-WF7-2C) 437 Tiffany Drive Waynesboro, VA 22980 (2) KOONS HYUNDAI STATION 1 1880 Opitz Blvd Woodbridge, VA 22191 ➡ VT (1) Cody Chevrolet 364 RIVER ST MONTPELIER, VT 05602 ➡ WA (1) 7112 - Bellevue WA (12903 NE 20th Street) 12903 NE 20th Bellevue, WA 98005 (1) 7060 - Burlington, WA (1790 South Burlington Blvd) 1790 South Burlington Blvd Burlington, WA 98233 (1) 5507 - Everett, WA (901 Casino Road) 901 Casino Road Everett, WA 98204 (1) 7025 - Everett, WA (13131 Bothell Everett Hwy) 13131 Bothell Everett Hwy Everett, WA 98208 (1) 4397 - Kelso, WA (1700 Allen Street) 1700 Allen Street Kelso, WA 98626 (1) 7063 - Olympia, WA (1725 Evergreen Park Drive SW) 1725 Evergreen Park Drive SW Olympia, WA 98502 (2) HANSON MOTORS HM3 QUICKCHARGE 2300 Carriage Loop SW Olympia, WA 98502 (1) 7096 - Sequim, WA (51 Carlsborg Road) 51 Carlsborg Road Sequim, WA 98382 (1) Walmart 2539 - Spokane Valley, WA 15727 E Broadway Ave Spokane Valley, WA 99037 (1) 7054 -Vancouver, WA 98664 (10314 SE Mill Plain Road) 13014 SE Mill Plain Rd Vancouver, WA 98684 (1) 7059 - Woodinville, WA (13023 NE 175th St) 13023 NE 175th St Woodinville, WA 98072 ➡ WI (1) BERG HYUNDAI VLI-L3-PDI-4 2900 N Victory Ln Appleton, WI 54913 (1) Wheelers Chevrolet of Coloma 1978 Charles Way Coloma, WI 54930 (1) Wheelers Chevrolet GMC of Marshfield 2701 S. Maple Ave Marshfield, WI 54449 

TLDR; - Traveled 800 miles to visit dying elderly relatives that had rampant feral cat breeding problem in their home. They struggled getting resources due to cat and bed bug infestations. No rescues would take the feral cats as they are feral indoooutdoor cats. Social services are moving relatives into a facility now.
Over Memorial Day weekend, I experienced a situation involving nearly 20-30 cats - and now, I am a firm believer that releasing them into the wild is a better option and/or plan than nothing at all.
Let's journey back in time to 2020, when my elderly great Aunt Beatrice and Uncle Jack (names changed of course) welcomed a female cat into their home who showed up on their doorstep hungry and meowing away. They live in a somewhat rural area of a small city (20k people) in the midwest about 150 miles from Chicago metro. Unbeknownst to them, the cat was pregnant and, within a matter of days, gave birth to 4 kittens.
Uncle Jack is extremely allergic to cats and the dander from the fur causes him to develop severe rashes throughout his body. Aunt Beatrice did everything she could to find the kittens new homes, but ultimately could not part with two of them, keeping a total of 3 cats in the home. Then, the mother cat escaped beyond one of them when they opened the door to get the mail, only to return about 6 months later (2021) -- pregnant.
This time, the mother cat gave birth to a whole new litter of 4 kittens, making a total of 7 cats in the home. Aunt Beatrice again got to work trying to find a way to adopt out the kittens, but during the pandemic, shelters and resources were maxed out as people were returning their pandemic pets for the sake of living or work obligations. She was only able to adopt out 1 kitten, keeping 6 cats in the home. And this time, Aunt Beatrice managed to get the mother cat spayed at the local vet, but couldn't afford any other spay/neuter care for the other 5 cats.
Thinking that the rest of the cats would never leave their home -- one of the female kittens escaped into the wild, returning months later pregnant with her first litter of 4 kittens. Now, they had 10 cats in the home, and it was becoming more challenging caring for them. The original female cat was officially a grandmother. Uncle Jack began suffering from very serious allergies and feeling sick/ill more frequently. Again, all of the local rescues, humane societies, and even animal control turned them down when they called for help.
Within a matter of a month or so, the daughter of the grandmother cat escaped again, returning to give birth to another set of kittens. She did this another THREE times in 2022 alone. By the end of 2022, they had nearly 16 cats and/or kittens in their home. Christmas 2022, I came to visit them and stayed with them for a week. I called EVERYWHERE within the tri-county area and even out of state to get help for these cats, and everyone was unable to help.
Aunt Beatrice was covered in cat scratches and bites, complaining that they jump and run across her in the middle of the night. Uncle Jack had very serious rashes, and to make matters worse, developed liver failure and had now begun end-of-life care with hospice. Aunt Beatrice wanted to keep them all, Uncle Jack wanted to be rid of them. Family and friends alike advised to kill them ourselves or "wait it out". One family friend offered to feed the cats to their pet snake.
Out of time and out of options, I waited for a warm winter's day, a series of days where the weather was 50-60 degrees. My partner and I drove around for hours, searching for rural area with lots of barns or a small village of houses away from major roads. There, I released 3 cats into the wild. And into the woods they ran. It was all we could grab/find in the house, the rest were scattered and so hard to catch. I, too, was out of time. We returned home and scheduled our return visit for the spring.
In that six months, only two more sets of litters were born -- or so we thought. Aunt Beatrice donated them to the church clergyman who showed up to pray for her at the house. A few of the teenage Jehovah Witnesses took 3 of the kittens. Others ran away and/or escaped from the open door during mail time, never to be seen again. Anyone she could pawn them off onto was welcome to have as many as they could take.
In recent weeks, we came back to visit and help declutter their home. Things are worse than ever before. The smell was immediately sickening. Adult protective services made it clear that the cats had to go. Animal control refused to come pick them up, "We don't even come out for cats anymore," they said. Everyone is booked and full to the brim, resources maxed out. Local vets charge $500 to do a spay or neuter, or wait more than a month to get on the list for the humane society or the spay express at $150/cat. It's a lot of money that we don't have to spend on more than 20+ cats.
We found between 12-16 cats/kittens and two of them were no longer alive on the enclosed back porch, which was so heartbreaking to find. So, with the sun high in the sky and winter long gone, we began the venture of releasing the cats into the wild yet again. We released 7 cats in the first few days, all of which were never friendly or touched by a human. Cats are very intelligent and are rather illusive to catch and/or trap. One of the last ones caught kept hiding under the kitchen sink, but we released her.
The next morning, we found 4 more newborn kittens trapped under a drawer in the kitchen. We think they belonged to the cat that would return to that cabinet often... the one we had already released. We struggled so much with trying to feed the kittens, they just wouldn't take the kitten formula. In a 100 mile radius, we called every. single. rescue. Everyone was full.
We don't have the financial means to pay for vet costs, and they are hefty. My great aunt and uncle couldn't afford it either. We were preparing to watch these kittens pass away from starvation as our every effort failed, and we were completely lost. FINALLY, nearly TWO DAYS after we had already released the mother cat, we found a rescue about 120 miles away that could take all of the kittens - just the kittens. And so, we traveled across state-lines and delivered them into the hands of people who could help, thanking them immensely for their care.
Lastly, we tried again for help with the remaining 5 cats to no avail. No one had room or returned our calls. We released the last 4 cats into remote areas or very small rural towns, off main roads. We released the cats in sets of 2-4 each time so they wouldn't be alone or could hunt/survive together. At least they may have a shot at finding a forever home on a farm than they would being starved to death on a hot enclosed porch or worse.
Uncle Jack has been doing much better without the cats. He's been having much better days. We feel confident the worst of his illness and symptoms came from his high allergy to the cats. The cleanup continues, though. The oldest cat - the one who started this all 3 years ago - ran away during the process. Maybe she might return, maybe not. Who knows. At least she was spayed.
You know, even Chicago intentionally released feral cats onto their streets just for the sake of getting rid of rodent infestation. Cats are accustomed to wild. So, I'd like to think that they are taking care of any mouse problems in the small towns they now reside in. And hopefully, someone may have found themselves an outdoor pet or domesticated one of them.
Do I have any regrets? No, I don't think so. If ever anyone else finds themselves in a situation where they have cats they can't care for and no where to turn, I may advocate for releasing to the wild... albeit maybe spaying or neutering first, if possible.
If you ever found yourself in this situation, I completely understand why you released it into the wild instead of intentionally having it euthanized or turned into food for something else. No judgment whatsoever. It is what it is.
Nearly everyone online will tell you to wait it out for help. I'm here to say that in the worst of situations, sometimes, help never arrives. Sometimes, you have to save yourself... or the ones you love. And that's okay.
If you were me, what could you have done differently?
UPDATE -- So a few things to be clarified here:

1. I do not live with these relatives. They live alone. The rest of the family moved away over the past 30 years (including me) as the town has very little work beyond medical careers. They have been abandoned by the family. Maybe the cat fermentation has been keeping them going, I don't know.
2. Cats are all outdooferal cats that come in/out of the house with no restrictions, not touched by relatives. They literally only play with or pet the first cat. The others are all non-human friendly, and bite or attack people. The county animal control and the humane society refused several of them AT THE DOOR.
3. NONE of the rescues would take ANYTHING but baby kittens because they are considered "feral". None of them. They are all feral/wild and not people-friendly. The two that got trapped on the back porch by the hospice nurse? They didn't even know they were on the back porch. Otherwise, they would have been outside, too.
4. The closest vet clinic does actually cost $500. They charge office visit costs, costs for anesthesia, pain medications, use of tools, etc. Seriously, I saw the bill for the first cat and got quotes from them for bringing in 5 cats the first time. They wanted nearly $2,500. That's more than they make on SS in a month. I don't have that kind of money.
5. I called at least 70 different phone numbers to find a place for those kittens. Most went to voicemails. A lot of rescues only work via email. I had dying/starving kittens that I could not figure out how to properly feed. I called everyone on Google Maps across more than 150 miles. Literally had to travel 120 miles to the place that finally did take them. And to make matters worse, this was during Memorial Day weekend. Everyone was closed.
6. They were all released in areas that were about 40-50 miles away from their house, but there's always a possibility they will return as they probably know their way home as they have been indoooutdoor cats their entire lives. It won't matter though because they are being moved to a nursing facility this month, but still. I'm not sure what else I could have done.

The East Coast of the United States is a treasure trove of breathtaking destinations, offering a myriad of experiences for travelers of all kinds. From stunning natural wonders to vibrant cities, the East Coast boasts an impressive array of vacation spots that are waiting to be discovered. In this article, we will highlight some of the top East Coast vacation spots, but for a comprehensive guide, be sure to check out the full blog post at Travelling Wings: www.travellingwings.com/40-best-east-coast-vacation-spots.

1. Mystic, Connecticut: Nestled on the shores of Long Island Sound, Mystic exudes a charming coastal vibe. With its historic seaport, captivating maritime history, and renowned Mystic Aquarium, this quaint town is one of the must-visit East Coast vacation spots.
2. Bar Harbor, Maine: Located near Acadia National Park, Bar Harbor is a picturesque coastal town renowned for its stunning landscapes and outdoor adventures. From hiking along scenic trails to exploring the charming streets filled with boutiques and eateries, Bar Harbor stands out among the best east coast vacation spots.
3. Charleston, South Carolina: With its cobblestone streets, antebellum mansions, and vibrant culinary scene, Charleston is a haven for history enthusiasts and food lovers alike. Immerse yourself in the city's rich heritage as you stroll through its beautiful gardens and soak up the Southern charm that defines the best east coast vacation spots.
4. Cape Cod, Massachusetts: Stretching out into the Atlantic Ocean, Cape Cod is a beloved summer destination known for its sandy beaches, picturesque lighthouses, and charming seaside villages. Explore the Cape's coastal beauty, indulge in fresh seafood, and create unforgettable memories at one of the top east coast vacation spots.
5. Miami, Florida: A vibrant city bursting with energy, Miami offers a unique blend of stunning beaches, lively nightlife, and diverse cultural experiences. Immerse yourself in the vibrant art scene, savor delicious cuisine, and soak up the sun along the iconic South Beach, making it one of the top east coast vacation spots.

Conclusion: The East Coast of the United States is home to a multitude of incredible vacation spots, each offering its own unique charm and allure. From historic towns to breathtaking coastal landscapes, the possibilities for exploration are endless. For a comprehensive guide to the 40 best East Coast vacation spots, be sure to visit the full blog post at Travelling Wings: www.travellingwings.com/40-best-east-coast-vacation-spots.. Get ready to embark on an unforgettable journey and discover the wonders of the East Coast's top vacation spots!

Fertilizing your garden plants can help them grow healthier, stronger and more productive. But how do you know what kind of fertilizer to use and when to apply it? Here are some tips to help you choose the right garden fertilizer for your plants.

Organic vs. Synthetic Fertilizer

One of the first decisions you need to make is whether to use organic or synthetic fertilizer. Organic fertilizers are made from natural sources like animal manure, plant materials, minerals and food waste. They are usually slow-release and provide a range of nutrients and beneficial microorganisms to the soil. Synthetic fertilizers are manufactured chemicals that contain specific amounts of nitrogen, phosphorus and potassium (NPK), the three main nutrients that plants need. They are usually fast-acting and can be tailored to suit different plant needs.
There are pros and cons to both types of fertilizer. Organic fertilizers are more environmentally friendly, safer for plants and animals, and improve the soil quality over time. However, they can be more expensive, harder to find, and less consistent in their nutrient content. Synthetic fertilizers are more readily available, cheaper, and easier to apply. However, they can also cause environmental problems like runoff, leaching and pollution, harm beneficial soil organisms, and burn the plants if overused.
The choice between organic and synthetic fertilizer depends largely on your personal preference, budget and gardening goals. Some gardeners prefer to use only organic products, especially for their food crops. Others use a combination of both types, applying organic fertilizer at the beginning of the season and synthetic fertilizer as needed throughout the growing period.
1. Soil Test
Before you apply any fertilizer to your garden, it is a good idea to test your soil to determine its pH level and nutrient status. A soil test can tell you if your soil is acidic or alkaline, and how much nitrogen, phosphorus and potassium it contains. This can help you choose the right type and amount of fertilizer for your plants.
You can buy a soil test kit from a garden store or online, or send a soil sample to a local extension service or laboratory for analysis. A soil test should be done at least once every three years, preferably in the spring before planting.
2. NPK Ratio
Another important factor to consider when choosing a garden fertilizer nz is the NPK ratio. This is the percentage of nitrogen (N), phosphorus (P) and potassium (K) in the fertilizer, expressed as three numbers on the label. For example, a 10-10-10 fertilizer contains 10% of each nutrient.
Different plants have different needs for these three nutrients. Nitrogen promotes leafy growth and green color; phosphorus supports root development and flowering; potassium enhances overall plant health and resistance to stress. Generally speaking, leafy vegetables and herbs need more nitrogen; flowering plants and fruits need more phosphorus; root crops and tubers need more potassium.
You can choose a balanced fertilizer with equal amounts of NPK for general purpose use, or a specific fertilizer with higher or lower amounts of one or more nutrients for particular plants or stages of growth. For example, you can use a high-nitrogen fertilizer for leafy greens in early spring, a high-phosphorus fertilizer for tomatoes and peppers in mid-summer, and a low-nitrogen fertilizer for bulbs in fall.

Application Method

The final thing to consider when choosing a garden fertilizer is how to apply it. There are different methods of application depending on the form and type of fertilizer you use. Granular fertilizers are dry pellets or grains that can be sprinkled on the soil surface or mixed into the soil before planting. They are usually slow-release and last for several weeks or months. Liquid fertilizer is solutions that can be sprayed on the foliage or watered into the soil around the plants. They are usually fast-acting and need to be applied more frequently, every one or two weeks. Spikes or stakes are solid rods that can be inserted into the soil near the roots of trees or shrubs. They are also slow-release and last for several months.
Compost is a type of organic fertilizer that can be spread on top of the soil as a mulch or dug into the soil before planting. It provides a range of nutrients and improves the soil structure and water retention. The best method of application depends on your preference, convenience and plant needs. You can also use more than one method for different plants or at different times of the season.
Conclusion
Choosing the right garden fertilizer for your plants can make a big difference in their growth and performance. By considering the type, soil test, NPK ratio and application method of fertilizer, you can provide your plants with the nutrients they need to thrive. Happy gardening!

These are not in any particular order - some may have come a few weeks ago, some today.
But I do have good news: I did NOT work on cards at all this weekend, because I spent Friday evening, Saturday and Sunday all doing amazing fun things with my wife as we kicked off our celebration of Pride month. For those who don't know, we currently have two houses, in two different states, one where she mostly lives (in the U.S. Pacific Northwest) and one where I mostly live (in the U.S. Southwest, known as the Cactus Cathouse). We are gearing up to sell our northern outpost house and live together in the Cactus Cathouse, and this was sort of our "last hurrah" weekend before showings and whatnot really get started.
But now, I'm trying to get cardthings caught up so that I'm not trying to deal with them during the eventual relocation, starting with these thanks and hopefully progressing on to a request and an offer tomorrow as time permits.
Also, someone in this (long) list sent me a lovely, large rainbow snail vinyl sticker, but I couldn't tell whose mail it came from. (Maybe u/amyt13?) Anyway, whoever you are, I appreciate you immensely and I'm sorry for not organizing myself better.
Thanks to:
(First of all, thanks to the flair team, because yikes this is the worst and I'm very sorry!)
u/amabisca - This handmade purple card (my favorite color!) is amazing and was such an uplifting surprise. Thank you so, so much!
u/amyt13 (x2) - Thank you for the beautiful handmade collage card, the Oscar Wilde card, and all the extras! I hope you are able to find a good place to call home too - the one you were describing sounds like my kind of town, and I hope it works out. I'll cross my fingers for you!
u/AppleCritter723 - This cute botanical card/letter I an opening from you is dated in April. APRIL, friend. I am sorry. It is full of good news and cute stickers and I swear I will write actual mail and not just send weird envelopes of things to you and your "bigger little" soon. I hope your Memorial Day weekend travels weren't too bad, and that Gandalf the adventurer is letting you occasionally stay inside. You created a meow-monster!
u/awachob - Goose!! I can't believe I got to be the goose! Thank you so much for a fun offer. (And for the neat stickers!)
u/blue-wanderer-quartz - I am very late saying thanks for the Five of Pentacles cat tarot sticker reading, but it was incredibly appropriate to read about pooling resources as my wife and I re-combine households in part due to love but in large part due to, well, wanting to actually have disposable income! I think it's interesting that we both chose pentacles for each other! (And the cat postcard your reading is on is very cute, I don't want to forget that!)
u/bluedecemberart (x2) - I love the vintage VA hospital postcard from Maine... and we already chatted about the "not noticing the chores" thing but rereading the card as I went to post this made me sure again that we are somehow the same person. WEIRD, but COOL. And your New York skyline postcard is lovely, and now I want to watch A Crown of Candy!
u/championvilla - I adore this MarioKart card! My wife and I used to play a lot (right now, we have the game systems packed for house-showing). I hope that your husband is continuing to feel better (and that the cat finally decided to get off of him, lol!)
u/chiquita61 - The sloth mermaid dolphin thank-you card with penguin stickers is absolutely wonderful... and I am so happy you liked my "reject" sticker card in all its glory!
u/comingtogetyoubabs (x6) - This crystal ball card with Petit's ABSOLUTE WISDOM is just amazing, friend. (Also, did I get a little teary at "writer of hugs in card form" MAYBE). And the amazing goodies you included - the cat-yang patch, your beautiful handmade notepaper... there is no way I deserve the awesomeness that is you "buzzing" into my life. And then the second cat card and all the goodies, including the adorable bookmark...! And THEN I realized you had hand-drawn me three tarot cards that you wrote about, AND then I found your origami letter... I am in awe, friend. You are wonderful!
u/cswl (x10) - This is what I get for not keeping up with my thanks, I feel silly with how behind I am for you, my dear friend! (Both in thanking AND in writing back.) Thank you for the cute plant notecard (I do not do Informed Delivery because it will just make me sad, I think); the red fox postcard (did you go to Fogo, which is one of my favorite places ever??); the "sources of acid" postcard (I always feel better when I have time for myself too, and also always delay it too long); the absolutely delicious LouPaper charcuterie board postcard (I have both too many cards and somehow never the ones I really feel like I wish I had to send people); the postcard from The Lion King (yay garage sale days!); the Strange Planet vibrating cat postcard (so outnumbered, I have given up, they are in charge now); the two different New Yorker cartoon cards (you are 100% right - hard times are harder on the one holding down the fort in SO many ways, been there/done that, and also guilt trips suck and I'm sorry the person tried to send you on one); the cute bird saying hi card (the one-house thing was her idea first, and it will definitely be for the best, though I need to make sure I keep focusing on me too!); and especially thanks for "Content Lives Everywhere" collage you made - that is just wonderful. You are so great. I am sorry I'm such a bad postal pal but I'm trying to do better!
u/dazeyferry (x2) - My dear friend, this penguin with flowers card is AMAZING and I am so, so grateful that you thought of me when you saw it. And the little floral thank-you card addition was perfect as well. I love you and I am so glad we are friends! As far as bingeworthy shows - have you seen Ted Lasso? Schmigadoon? (Both on AppleTV.) Those are amazing. We also started watching Hello, Tomorrow, which is a bit sad sometimes but really good! I'll try to think of some more, too.
u/draconic_healing - I love this little tiny Polaroid-style postcard - it's adorable! Please pet the kitty for me - I couldn't tell if you wrote "Bear" or "Bean" but both are great names!
u/dwrfstr - This gold penguin card is amazing and adorable and I cannot believe your luck to find it thrifted! I picked up a set of hundreds of vintage postcards from an art reuse store that's near where we met up, and I ended up with, like, 16 of the same weird chapel at a church camp in South Dakota, so you definitely win...
u/fancayschmanzayyy - Your cat thank-you card was wonderful (as were the cool stickers!) And most of all, I very much appreciate you telling me about your act of kindness and I especially appreciate your caregiving nature. I cared for my mom for many years before she passed away and stories like the one you told will always be especially important to me. You make a difference and I am so grateful you exist!
u/Fancykiddens (x2) - I feel terribly, terribly guilty for how late I am thanking you for this amazing CARD-CEPTION package!! First, from the pengin section: the pengin family you drew me, how awesome are they?! You are so talented! I almost never keep envelopes but this one got immediately saved with my "penguin stash." Then there was your beautiful handmade Frida Kahlo card - exactly my vibe, I love it! The penguin goodie bag with the penguins and their fish snackles inside was adorable too. And then, moving to the "monsteroo" or cute monster section, I adored your Monsters Inc. letter and goodies as well! I especially liked hearing that, at the time you wrote it, you were feeling particularly well and accomplished, and I adored hearing how much carding has helped your outlook. SAME, FRIEND. So much so!!
u/feellikebeingajerk (x2) - Holly Hobbie card (the first, maybe?) has arrived! And yes, it brought back awesome memories. I didn't get a lot of "trendy" things growing up, as my parents and I didn't have a lot of money, but there was a discount department store near us, sort of an early version of a T.J. Maxx or Ross that was called Hills, and it would sometimes get slight misprints or seconds of things like bedding, which is, I am -positive-, how I came to be able to have Holly Hobbie. And I don't remember anything "wrong" with it, so, way to go, Mom of PinkPengin, for that find! LOL. Also, thanks for the cool Papyrus thank-you card from your random offer, and for the stickers!
u/fieldofcabins - This adorable bee thank-you postcard is so great (and the penguin as the stamp image, ahhh!) I am glad your dad is healing and please let him know I'm still thinking of him. (And of course I'm always thinking of you, too!)
u/GizmoDOS - Thanks for the solar system postcard, friend! I loved hearing from you. Life really has been hectic lately. I hope yours is moving in the direction of settling down. Mine is going to be rough briefly but then hopefully a lot smoother!
u/hermitcreature - I love this Studio Ghibli-themed card and all the great stickers and dragon facts from your book (and the amazing Zimbabwean owl stamp)! I hope you will like your card from me in exchange when it arrives - I just sent it this week, I am very sorry!
u/HexagonalRainbow - I loved your anime postcard but even more, I loved hearing about your concert!
u/isar-love (x2) - These cartoon owls with their hats and shoes on your card from March are AMAZING! (And the accompanying postcard with more behatted owls also made my day!) I agree with you very much that owl facial expressions are the thing that especially warms my heart to them. They seem so intelligent and curious and often kind (especially in illustrations) with their big eyes looking right at me! I have several little stuffed-animal friend owls, including two very special ones named Swoops (who is tan) and Fwoops (who is pink, though his name reference is from fuschia - he is a "Fuschia Swoops" - way better than a Pink Swoops, who I fear would have to be "Poops," LOL!) Thank you so much for your wonderful kindness and friendship and fun mail!
u/jaimekj - Thank you for the floral card, great stickers and most importantly your note and your friendship! I do like New Mexico (more than my part of the Southwest, honestly, but we had family reasons we picked where we did)! I'm crossing my fingers about an interest-rate drop. If I had my choice, I'd either like to find someone bigger in Washington, or move back to Pennsylvania, I think. There are ups and downs to both. And I will VERY much hate going back to snow, that's one thing I do love about where I am in the desert!
u/jvanct88 - I cannot tell you how thrilled I am to have a letter from you with an update (and updated address), dear friend! In one way, I am VERY sorry for all the things you have been finding out, but in another way I am happy that you finally know the truth and I believe that knowing it will be very helpful in having closure and a good feeling as you move to a new chapter in your life. And I am VERY hopeful that your tattoo came out amazing! I am a big, big fan of tattoos and piercings. A funny story is that I got 2 new tattoos and several piercings when my wife and I were separated, including a nosering, which she always said she hated. (She didn't mind other tattoos and piercings generally.) When we got back together, she apologized for ever saying that, and said how good it looks on me. That was nice, but I very plainly also told her, "I wouldn't care even if you hate it, because I love it and I'm keeping it forever." LOL! Anyway, I love this dinosaur princess cactus card and I am very happy to hear from you and will write to you again soon!
u/KatDuq (x3) - My dear friend!! This butterfly card you made to thank me for MY card in honor of your new letter opener is beautiful (as are the included penguin stickers, which are beautiful, of course!) I also loved your separate letter talking about the things you make. I do journal, sometimes, but I suffer from the problem of all notebook and journal-havers... I hate to USE the beautiful books I have lest I "mess them up!" What really helped me get out of that mindset somewhat was actually the Happy Planner notebooks, because I felt like I could always remove pages and rearrange! And now I am getting into bookbinding and I feel like that helps too because I can more easily make things "modular" and not have the fear of ruining a whole gigantic book right off the bat. I know that's perfectionism talking and I am working on getting rid of that mindset altogether, but for now, baby steps. And HUGE congrats on what you've sold, you definitely have a customer in me if you get an online store set up! Finally, thank you for the lovely oracle reading, which (unsurprisingly) was just what I needed to hear now, tonight, as I write this! I specifically didn't look closely at it until now because I figured I'd see it when the time was right and... yup. I did. You are amazing and I appreciate you sharing your beautiful new deck with me. (And that logo stamp you got! SO worth it, it looks amazing!)
u/littlemermaidxx - Your Pride Is Everyday postcard is beautiful - thank you so much! I have Pride happy mail coming your way too.
u/maiiiu (x3) - WOW, you are way too kind to me!! What an adorable thank-you postcard, first of all. And I adored your wonderful handmade penguin collage thank-you card too, and loved hearing the good news about your summer trip plans. I hope it is a truly special time for you and your dear best friend! And then this custom penguin stationery... WOW. You are just amazing and I am very grateful! (Also, the way you attached your sticker gifts in your collage card was great, I might steal that method.)
u/melhen16 - Where did you find this amazing desert-post-office-style card? Did you make it? It's amazing! (And thank you for the beautiful stickers, too!)
u/mumbagoespainting (x3) - Your handmade hometown card is so beautiful, my friend! I loved hearing how you learned to say it. (I admit - I get that one wrong on the first try and have to correct myself every time, despite being from not terribly far south, where we heard it more than occasionally!) And your watercolor dragon is absolutely fabulous!! I loved hearing that we have very similar color tastes - purples, grays, teal! Seeing the dragon pick up those colors was perfect. Finally, your black-and-white abstract card with the glitter made me smile, though I was sad to read about why you had to miss the trip... I hope you are feeling better! And, of course, thank you again for all your stickers and other extras and most importantly for your kindness and friendship. I am beyond grateful for you!!
u/ninajyang - I like the crafty postcard from Pipsticks! And yeah... Hairspray... love the music, definitely not sure about some other things... sigh.
u/nirelleth - I absolutely adore this great penguin and fox postcard for our "wish" exchange! I hope you like yours when it arrives, too. (I just sent it last week, I am so sorry for the wait!) I think my favorite fact about penguins is that they are not all polar; in fact, some of my favorites are temperate ones. (I say, in fact, that I myself am a "temperate pengin!")
u/non_avian (x3) - I am VERY sorry this has taken me so long to write (and even to open and fully enjoy). Your handmade Scoffby postcard with my past-present-future reading was absolutely amazing and is going on my "display shelf" of some of my most treasured cards! I need to know how you made his crystal ball, which is gorgeous! Also, please tell Scoffby that I am very much food-motivated (in fact, I just bribed myself tonight with hibachi). So, his signature chant is VERY well-placed when directed at me. I also adored your letter and the cute paper it was written on, and I am thrilled about the Furby washi card and all the goodies, too! I had no idea that Furby washi even existed, though I guess I shouldn't be surprised... and the capy noodles sticker and adorable penguins and everything else... I am so grateful. I have some mail coming your way very soon; all the "parts" are ready, I just need to put them together and actually get it sent!
u/Peonynote (x2) - Your cat thank-you card was adorable and most importantly, I am so excited for all your travels (and I LOVED seeing your penguin friends together!) And the lovely rainbow card with penguin stickers and super-cute penguin sticky note, in honor of Pride Month, made my day! I hope your walking is going well, still, now that it's getting warmer and stickier.
u/ResidentComposer1939 - I loved your sweet bird notecard and your penguin drawing (it's WAY better than my drawings, let me tell you!)
u/SherlockLady (x3) - Your beautiful butterfly card was lovely as it was, and then I saw the cute mini-card with the reminder about being the happiest/healthiest version of myself, AND the special penguin painting from your young carding apprentice... and wow, I just felt so special! What an awesome gift.
u/soft_distortion - This Gender Is Such a Drag postcard is perfecttttttttt. I loved hearing about the drag brunches too!
u/thecalendonianrose - This square penguin card is amazing and I am so grateful that you thought of sending it to me! (And all the stickers are lovely, thank you!) My wife and allllll the kitties say hello back.
u/TigerLady13 - This is definitely a late thanks, I apologize! But I appreciated the vintage Continental Divide postcard and the "Peng-Win" pun... made me giggle!
u/TyeDyeAmish - I love this pufferfish card, and I have really enjoyed getting to chat with you recently! Most importantly, how was the book sale?! I'm fairly certain it's one I've been to in the past, based on the date you said you were going, and I miss it and a few others in the area so much!
u/umeshufan - Why, yes, this Cat Island postcard DOES look like my house, and yes, there are really 19 inside, and even funnier, YES, I am allergic to cats. The thing is, you do build up a tolerance to ones you are around regularly, but when I travel and then come back, it is truly a nightmare. Thankfully I almost never let any in my bedroom and never to sleep, so I can at least breathe overnight!
u/wabisabi_sf (x2) - My friend, I am in awe of these amazing pink-and-penguin-themed pieces of happy mail!! I had never seen these before and I am DEFINITELY going to be getting more. You are so wonderful to me!
u/welshfancy (x5) - Thanks for the Laughlin postcard (very belatedly)! Your trip to Long Beach sounds almost as multi-stop as my recent cards' journeys to you, though thankfully you didn't need your passport, at least?! And thank you also for the amazing handmade "blooms" collage card (which, as far as I'm concerned, is appropriate for spring OR summer, so it seems perfectly timed to me); the great cat mini-card that you wrote while either eating breakfast or getting your tires changed on your travels; the penguin-with-J-based-life-preserver doodle (which I thought was GREAT, so don't even say it's worse than your others, which I also liked!); and your lovely letter on penguin paper, plus of course the bonus stationery! You spoil me!! I'm thinking of you as you try to decide "what's next" locationally, too.
u/yetanotherblankface - I think your beautiful handmade card for the "Hometown" meta challenge is giving exactly the right vibes! It certainly made me feel cozy and relaxed, which is the feeling I'd most like to associate with home.
u/yviantics - Your hand-drawn Pink Party Penguin postcard with its lovely hat, and the great penguin sticker, absolutely made my day!! I do not draw well at all and I am always amazed when people who can will share their talent with me. Thank you so, so much! (And, by the way, I tried the bananas-and-barbecue-chips combo and was really surprised at how good it was, so thanks for that, too!)
u/56thorns and u/UseYourRuler - Thank you for the wonderful postcard from the "Falls!" My wife and I were there to ring in the New Year for 2019 and I've been a couple other times too. Such a lovely place for a getaway, and it sounds like you had fun!
u/todayisfab, u/sebisrude and u/KeenEvergreen - In my stack of not-thanked-yet mail I found my very own postcard from our meetup, and it made me smile all over again. Thank you all so much, again, for a fun day. And to whichever of you put penguin stickers on this along with the cacti - I am super impressed that you pulled that off without me noticing, they are WAY too cute.

Me and my wife are planning to buy a home in the bay area. We are first time homebuyers and we liked the condos and townhomes near the warm springs BART. Is there anybody in the community that I can talk to, to understand better about the community, area etc?